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How do I get over these (possibly sexist) feelings regarding an underqualified labmate?
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Well, this is kind of embarrassing for me and I am judging myself as well.
I have just started my PhD. And there is another girl who has started in the same lab as me. Over the first week, I found out that she does not know how to program well. She does not understand many basic terms and had no publication before while I had several publications. On top of that, she is being paid several thousand dollars more than me.
Now, why I am judging myself? Because of my gender (man). Before starting my PhD, I used to believe that sexism was mostly created by insecure men.
Over the past weeks I have been having difficult feelings:
Did I not work hard enough for my PhD admission?
Could I be in a better university?
Or, is the system biased toward women?
Am I becoming sexist?
I do not know how to get over this. Any suggestions?
graduate-school interpersonal-issues
edited 27 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
asked 2 hours ago
Anonymous Watermelon
63
New contributor
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
add a comment |Â
up vote
1
down vote
favorite
Well, this is kind of embarrassing for me and I am judging myself as well.
I have just started my PhD. And there is another girl who has started in the same lab as me. Over the first week, I found out that she does not know how to program well. She does not understand many basic terms and had no publication before while I had several publications. On top of that, she is being paid several thousand dollars more than me.
Now, why I am judging myself? Because of my gender (man). Before starting my PhD, I used to believe that sexism was mostly created by insecure men.
Over the past weeks I have been having difficult feelings:
Did I not work hard enough for my PhD admission?
Could I be in a better university?
Or, is the system biased toward women?
Am I becoming sexist?
I do not know how to get over this. Any suggestions?
graduate-school interpersonal-issues
edited 27 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
asked 2 hours ago
Anonymous Watermelon
63
New contributor
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
6
It seems that, without any particular evidence, you have jumped to the conclusion that your colleague's higher pay is because of her gender. You're apparently a scientist; is that a scientific conclusion? Correlation is not causation.
– Nate Eldredge
2 hours ago
That is true. To be honest, before coming here, I thought I would see everyone better than me or equal to me. Not someone from the same lab, who constantly asks the similar basic questions over and over again. I thought, I would be one asking questions to the labmats and learn from them. I thought, I would distance myself from her so that I am not asked that many questions. Turns out, we are taking the same courses as well.....
– Anonymous Watermelon
2 hours ago
2
What "system"? What discipline? Academia is not monolithic and, shock horror, varies across both disciplines and countries.
– Yemon Choi
2 hours ago
...and even between different universities in the same country, different departments at the same university, and different research groups in the same department.
– JeffE
1 hour ago
2
I want to gently point out that a couple of your questions sound very insecure.
– Dawn
1 hour ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
1
down vote
favorite
up vote
1
down vote
favorite
Well, this is kind of embarrassing for me and I am judging myself as well.
I have just started my PhD. And there is another girl who has started in the same lab as me. Over the first week, I found out that she does not know how to program well. She does not understand many basic terms and had no publication before while I had several publications. On top of that, she is being paid several thousand dollars more than me.
Now, why I am judging myself? Because of my gender (man). Before starting my PhD, I used to believe that sexism was mostly created by insecure men.
Over the past weeks I have been having difficult feelings:
Did I not work hard enough for my PhD admission?
Could I be in a better university?
Or, is the system biased toward women?
Am I becoming sexist?
I do not know how to get over this. Any suggestions?
graduate-school interpersonal-issues
edited 27 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
asked 2 hours ago
Anonymous Watermelon
63
New contributor
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
Well, this is kind of embarrassing for me and I am judging myself as well.
I have just started my PhD. And there is another girl who has started in the same lab as me. Over the first week, I found out that she does not know how to program well. She does not understand many basic terms and had no publication before while I had several publications. On top of that, she is being paid several thousand dollars more than me.
Now, why I am judging myself? Because of my gender (man). Before starting my PhD, I used to believe that sexism was mostly created by insecure men.
Over the past weeks I have been having difficult feelings:
Did I not work hard enough for my PhD admission?
Could I be in a better university?
Or, is the system biased toward women?
Am I becoming sexist?
I do not know how to get over this. Any suggestions?
graduate-school interpersonal-issues
graduate-school interpersonal-issues
edited 27 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
asked 2 hours ago
Anonymous Watermelon
63
New contributor
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
edited 27 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
asked 2 hours ago
Anonymous Watermelon
63
New contributor
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
edited 27 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
edited 27 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
edited 27 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
7,50531839
asked 2 hours ago
Anonymous Watermelon
63
New contributor
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
asked 2 hours ago
Anonymous Watermelon
63
asked 2 hours ago
Anonymous Watermelon
63
63
New contributor
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
New contributor
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
6
It seems that, without any particular evidence, you have jumped to the conclusion that your colleague's higher pay is because of her gender. You're apparently a scientist; is that a scientific conclusion? Correlation is not causation.
– Nate Eldredge
2 hours ago
That is true. To be honest, before coming here, I thought I would see everyone better than me or equal to me. Not someone from the same lab, who constantly asks the similar basic questions over and over again. I thought, I would be one asking questions to the labmats and learn from them. I thought, I would distance myself from her so that I am not asked that many questions. Turns out, we are taking the same courses as well.....
– Anonymous Watermelon
2 hours ago
2
What "system"? What discipline? Academia is not monolithic and, shock horror, varies across both disciplines and countries.
– Yemon Choi
2 hours ago
...and even between different universities in the same country, different departments at the same university, and different research groups in the same department.
– JeffE
1 hour ago
2
I want to gently point out that a couple of your questions sound very insecure.
– Dawn
1 hour ago
add a comment |Â
6
It seems that, without any particular evidence, you have jumped to the conclusion that your colleague's higher pay is because of her gender. You're apparently a scientist; is that a scientific conclusion? Correlation is not causation.
– Nate Eldredge
2 hours ago
That is true. To be honest, before coming here, I thought I would see everyone better than me or equal to me. Not someone from the same lab, who constantly asks the similar basic questions over and over again. I thought, I would be one asking questions to the labmats and learn from them. I thought, I would distance myself from her so that I am not asked that many questions. Turns out, we are taking the same courses as well.....
– Anonymous Watermelon
2 hours ago
2
What "system"? What discipline? Academia is not monolithic and, shock horror, varies across both disciplines and countries.
– Yemon Choi
2 hours ago
...and even between different universities in the same country, different departments at the same university, and different research groups in the same department.
– JeffE
1 hour ago
2
I want to gently point out that a couple of your questions sound very insecure.
– Dawn
1 hour ago
6
6
It seems that, without any particular evidence, you have jumped to the conclusion that your colleague's higher pay is because of her gender. You're apparently a scientist; is that a scientific conclusion? Correlation is not causation.
– Nate Eldredge
2 hours ago
It seems that, without any particular evidence, you have jumped to the conclusion that your colleague's higher pay is because of her gender. You're apparently a scientist; is that a scientific conclusion? Correlation is not causation.
– Nate Eldredge
2 hours ago
That is true. To be honest, before coming here, I thought I would see everyone better than me or equal to me. Not someone from the same lab, who constantly asks the similar basic questions over and over again. I thought, I would be one asking questions to the labmats and learn from them. I thought, I would distance myself from her so that I am not asked that many questions. Turns out, we are taking the same courses as well.....
– Anonymous Watermelon
2 hours ago
That is true. To be honest, before coming here, I thought I would see everyone better than me or equal to me. Not someone from the same lab, who constantly asks the similar basic questions over and over again. I thought, I would be one asking questions to the labmats and learn from them. I thought, I would distance myself from her so that I am not asked that many questions. Turns out, we are taking the same courses as well.....
– Anonymous Watermelon
2 hours ago
2
2
What "system"? What discipline? Academia is not monolithic and, shock horror, varies across both disciplines and countries.
– Yemon Choi
2 hours ago
What "system"? What discipline? Academia is not monolithic and, shock horror, varies across both disciplines and countries.
– Yemon Choi
2 hours ago
...and even between different universities in the same country, different departments at the same university, and different research groups in the same department.
– JeffE
1 hour ago
...and even between different universities in the same country, different departments at the same university, and different research groups in the same department.
– JeffE
1 hour ago
2
2
I want to gently point out that a couple of your questions sound very insecure.
– Dawn
1 hour ago
I want to gently point out that a couple of your questions sound very insecure.
– Dawn
1 hour ago
add a comment |Â
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
up vote
5
down vote
It seems as if you have two major issues.
1) This person doesn't know how to code
2) This person asks a lot of questions.
First, it would benefit you to remember that there are many skills required to be a good researcher. Examples include the ability to come up with good research problems, to develop theory, to read results in a way that makes connections/insights. This person may have been admitted because they are highly skilled at one of these other areas. The committee may believe that the person can pick up on the skills they lack. I myself started my PhD with horrendous gaps in my knowledge (my friends tell me that they were horrified by the questions I asked first year), but my letter writers were able to assure the committee that I was a quick study (and I was).
Second, you should remember that learning styles vary, and some people learn best by asking questions. It may not be your learning style, but one of the reasons study groups exist is that many people learn well by walking through problems and questions with others. This is the sort of thing that the askees seem to either love or hate. I had faculty tell me that I was their favorite student because I asked great clarifying questions during their courses/departmental seminars. I had other faculty tell me that I would never succeed in academia because "no one likes people who ask questions." If you are in group two, the best thing you can do is put in some headphones so you don't appear to be available for questions.
answered 1 hour ago
Dawn
6,51111740
Yeah this is true. In my undergrad, I used to learn mostly alone would probably go into study group like twice or thrice in the semester [once before the final exam of each subject]. This would usually help to clarify the gaps. I was not from a community that asked lots of question all the time or from day one. Thanks you for clearing that out. I do not think I am in group 2, at least I should not. Because I asked a question a lot of the time. But I usually do an internet search or reference reading before asking questions.
– Anonymous Watermelon
44 mins ago
Another, reason I asked the question, whether I am being over confident by saying the things I said here. Mentoring a grad student in Programming, who is at the same level as me and applied for the same program as me, was definitely not the thing I was looking for when I hopped on that plane....
– Anonymous Watermelon
39 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
I would factorize this into two separate issues.
First, fairness. You seem to think this person is much less qualified than you, and yet she got admitted and is even paid more. A few points to consider:
- Your are not privy to the reason(s) she was admitted. She may be strong in other areas. You do not have enough evidence to say that admitting her was a mistake / unfair.
- In many departments (particularly non-top-tier ones), candidates are admitted in the hope that they will show more aptitude for graduate study than they did as an undergraduate. Sometimes this bet works out, sometimes it doesn't. It may simply be that admitting her was a gamble that didn't pay off (or simply a mistake). In this case, the professors are likely also unhappy, but not much can be done at this point.
- I'd like to think that most departments wouldn't purposefully admit someone who is unqualified. That said, many departments have too many qualified candidates, and choose to give preference to candidates with different backgrounds. For better or for worse, academia in many countries operates this way, and you will have to get used to it at some level.
Second, concern about your own performance. My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear. These are separate issues, and you should treat them as such. However, it may be that there is real reason for concern about your school (in which case you should reconsider your options there), or it may be that this is an irrational but persistent fear (in which case the way to "get over it" may involve counseling, etc.).
answered 30 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
"My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear." This is kind of true, I guess. :
– Anonymous Watermelon
3 mins ago
add a comment |Â
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
2 Answers
2
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
up vote
5
down vote
It seems as if you have two major issues.
1) This person doesn't know how to code
2) This person asks a lot of questions.
First, it would benefit you to remember that there are many skills required to be a good researcher. Examples include the ability to come up with good research problems, to develop theory, to read results in a way that makes connections/insights. This person may have been admitted because they are highly skilled at one of these other areas. The committee may believe that the person can pick up on the skills they lack. I myself started my PhD with horrendous gaps in my knowledge (my friends tell me that they were horrified by the questions I asked first year), but my letter writers were able to assure the committee that I was a quick study (and I was).
Second, you should remember that learning styles vary, and some people learn best by asking questions. It may not be your learning style, but one of the reasons study groups exist is that many people learn well by walking through problems and questions with others. This is the sort of thing that the askees seem to either love or hate. I had faculty tell me that I was their favorite student because I asked great clarifying questions during their courses/departmental seminars. I had other faculty tell me that I would never succeed in academia because "no one likes people who ask questions." If you are in group two, the best thing you can do is put in some headphones so you don't appear to be available for questions.
answered 1 hour ago
Dawn
6,51111740
Yeah this is true. In my undergrad, I used to learn mostly alone would probably go into study group like twice or thrice in the semester [once before the final exam of each subject]. This would usually help to clarify the gaps. I was not from a community that asked lots of question all the time or from day one. Thanks you for clearing that out. I do not think I am in group 2, at least I should not. Because I asked a question a lot of the time. But I usually do an internet search or reference reading before asking questions.
– Anonymous Watermelon
44 mins ago
Another, reason I asked the question, whether I am being over confident by saying the things I said here. Mentoring a grad student in Programming, who is at the same level as me and applied for the same program as me, was definitely not the thing I was looking for when I hopped on that plane....
– Anonymous Watermelon
39 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
5
down vote
It seems as if you have two major issues.
1) This person doesn't know how to code
2) This person asks a lot of questions.
First, it would benefit you to remember that there are many skills required to be a good researcher. Examples include the ability to come up with good research problems, to develop theory, to read results in a way that makes connections/insights. This person may have been admitted because they are highly skilled at one of these other areas. The committee may believe that the person can pick up on the skills they lack. I myself started my PhD with horrendous gaps in my knowledge (my friends tell me that they were horrified by the questions I asked first year), but my letter writers were able to assure the committee that I was a quick study (and I was).
Second, you should remember that learning styles vary, and some people learn best by asking questions. It may not be your learning style, but one of the reasons study groups exist is that many people learn well by walking through problems and questions with others. This is the sort of thing that the askees seem to either love or hate. I had faculty tell me that I was their favorite student because I asked great clarifying questions during their courses/departmental seminars. I had other faculty tell me that I would never succeed in academia because "no one likes people who ask questions." If you are in group two, the best thing you can do is put in some headphones so you don't appear to be available for questions.
answered 1 hour ago
Dawn
6,51111740
Yeah this is true. In my undergrad, I used to learn mostly alone would probably go into study group like twice or thrice in the semester [once before the final exam of each subject]. This would usually help to clarify the gaps. I was not from a community that asked lots of question all the time or from day one. Thanks you for clearing that out. I do not think I am in group 2, at least I should not. Because I asked a question a lot of the time. But I usually do an internet search or reference reading before asking questions.
– Anonymous Watermelon
44 mins ago
Another, reason I asked the question, whether I am being over confident by saying the things I said here. Mentoring a grad student in Programming, who is at the same level as me and applied for the same program as me, was definitely not the thing I was looking for when I hopped on that plane....
– Anonymous Watermelon
39 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
5
down vote
up vote
5
down vote
It seems as if you have two major issues.
1) This person doesn't know how to code
2) This person asks a lot of questions.
First, it would benefit you to remember that there are many skills required to be a good researcher. Examples include the ability to come up with good research problems, to develop theory, to read results in a way that makes connections/insights. This person may have been admitted because they are highly skilled at one of these other areas. The committee may believe that the person can pick up on the skills they lack. I myself started my PhD with horrendous gaps in my knowledge (my friends tell me that they were horrified by the questions I asked first year), but my letter writers were able to assure the committee that I was a quick study (and I was).
Second, you should remember that learning styles vary, and some people learn best by asking questions. It may not be your learning style, but one of the reasons study groups exist is that many people learn well by walking through problems and questions with others. This is the sort of thing that the askees seem to either love or hate. I had faculty tell me that I was their favorite student because I asked great clarifying questions during their courses/departmental seminars. I had other faculty tell me that I would never succeed in academia because "no one likes people who ask questions." If you are in group two, the best thing you can do is put in some headphones so you don't appear to be available for questions.
answered 1 hour ago
Dawn
6,51111740
It seems as if you have two major issues.
1) This person doesn't know how to code
2) This person asks a lot of questions.
First, it would benefit you to remember that there are many skills required to be a good researcher. Examples include the ability to come up with good research problems, to develop theory, to read results in a way that makes connections/insights. This person may have been admitted because they are highly skilled at one of these other areas. The committee may believe that the person can pick up on the skills they lack. I myself started my PhD with horrendous gaps in my knowledge (my friends tell me that they were horrified by the questions I asked first year), but my letter writers were able to assure the committee that I was a quick study (and I was).
Second, you should remember that learning styles vary, and some people learn best by asking questions. It may not be your learning style, but one of the reasons study groups exist is that many people learn well by walking through problems and questions with others. This is the sort of thing that the askees seem to either love or hate. I had faculty tell me that I was their favorite student because I asked great clarifying questions during their courses/departmental seminars. I had other faculty tell me that I would never succeed in academia because "no one likes people who ask questions." If you are in group two, the best thing you can do is put in some headphones so you don't appear to be available for questions.
answered 1 hour ago
Dawn
6,51111740
answered 1 hour ago
Dawn
6,51111740
answered 1 hour ago
Dawn
6,51111740
answered 1 hour ago
Dawn
6,51111740
6,51111740
Yeah this is true. In my undergrad, I used to learn mostly alone would probably go into study group like twice or thrice in the semester [once before the final exam of each subject]. This would usually help to clarify the gaps. I was not from a community that asked lots of question all the time or from day one. Thanks you for clearing that out. I do not think I am in group 2, at least I should not. Because I asked a question a lot of the time. But I usually do an internet search or reference reading before asking questions.
– Anonymous Watermelon
44 mins ago
Another, reason I asked the question, whether I am being over confident by saying the things I said here. Mentoring a grad student in Programming, who is at the same level as me and applied for the same program as me, was definitely not the thing I was looking for when I hopped on that plane....
– Anonymous Watermelon
39 mins ago
add a comment |Â
Yeah this is true. In my undergrad, I used to learn mostly alone would probably go into study group like twice or thrice in the semester [once before the final exam of each subject]. This would usually help to clarify the gaps. I was not from a community that asked lots of question all the time or from day one. Thanks you for clearing that out. I do not think I am in group 2, at least I should not. Because I asked a question a lot of the time. But I usually do an internet search or reference reading before asking questions.
– Anonymous Watermelon
44 mins ago
Another, reason I asked the question, whether I am being over confident by saying the things I said here. Mentoring a grad student in Programming, who is at the same level as me and applied for the same program as me, was definitely not the thing I was looking for when I hopped on that plane....
– Anonymous Watermelon
39 mins ago
Yeah this is true. In my undergrad, I used to learn mostly alone would probably go into study group like twice or thrice in the semester [once before the final exam of each subject]. This would usually help to clarify the gaps. I was not from a community that asked lots of question all the time or from day one. Thanks you for clearing that out. I do not think I am in group 2, at least I should not. Because I asked a question a lot of the time. But I usually do an internet search or reference reading before asking questions.
– Anonymous Watermelon
44 mins ago
Yeah this is true. In my undergrad, I used to learn mostly alone would probably go into study group like twice or thrice in the semester [once before the final exam of each subject]. This would usually help to clarify the gaps. I was not from a community that asked lots of question all the time or from day one. Thanks you for clearing that out. I do not think I am in group 2, at least I should not. Because I asked a question a lot of the time. But I usually do an internet search or reference reading before asking questions.
– Anonymous Watermelon
44 mins ago
Another, reason I asked the question, whether I am being over confident by saying the things I said here. Mentoring a grad student in Programming, who is at the same level as me and applied for the same program as me, was definitely not the thing I was looking for when I hopped on that plane....
– Anonymous Watermelon
39 mins ago
Another, reason I asked the question, whether I am being over confident by saying the things I said here. Mentoring a grad student in Programming, who is at the same level as me and applied for the same program as me, was definitely not the thing I was looking for when I hopped on that plane....
– Anonymous Watermelon
39 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
I would factorize this into two separate issues.
First, fairness. You seem to think this person is much less qualified than you, and yet she got admitted and is even paid more. A few points to consider:
- Your are not privy to the reason(s) she was admitted. She may be strong in other areas. You do not have enough evidence to say that admitting her was a mistake / unfair.
- In many departments (particularly non-top-tier ones), candidates are admitted in the hope that they will show more aptitude for graduate study than they did as an undergraduate. Sometimes this bet works out, sometimes it doesn't. It may simply be that admitting her was a gamble that didn't pay off (or simply a mistake). In this case, the professors are likely also unhappy, but not much can be done at this point.
- I'd like to think that most departments wouldn't purposefully admit someone who is unqualified. That said, many departments have too many qualified candidates, and choose to give preference to candidates with different backgrounds. For better or for worse, academia in many countries operates this way, and you will have to get used to it at some level.
Second, concern about your own performance. My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear. These are separate issues, and you should treat them as such. However, it may be that there is real reason for concern about your school (in which case you should reconsider your options there), or it may be that this is an irrational but persistent fear (in which case the way to "get over it" may involve counseling, etc.).
answered 30 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
"My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear." This is kind of true, I guess. :
– Anonymous Watermelon
3 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
I would factorize this into two separate issues.
First, fairness. You seem to think this person is much less qualified than you, and yet she got admitted and is even paid more. A few points to consider:
- Your are not privy to the reason(s) she was admitted. She may be strong in other areas. You do not have enough evidence to say that admitting her was a mistake / unfair.
- In many departments (particularly non-top-tier ones), candidates are admitted in the hope that they will show more aptitude for graduate study than they did as an undergraduate. Sometimes this bet works out, sometimes it doesn't. It may simply be that admitting her was a gamble that didn't pay off (or simply a mistake). In this case, the professors are likely also unhappy, but not much can be done at this point.
- I'd like to think that most departments wouldn't purposefully admit someone who is unqualified. That said, many departments have too many qualified candidates, and choose to give preference to candidates with different backgrounds. For better or for worse, academia in many countries operates this way, and you will have to get used to it at some level.
Second, concern about your own performance. My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear. These are separate issues, and you should treat them as such. However, it may be that there is real reason for concern about your school (in which case you should reconsider your options there), or it may be that this is an irrational but persistent fear (in which case the way to "get over it" may involve counseling, etc.).
answered 30 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
"My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear." This is kind of true, I guess. :
– Anonymous Watermelon
3 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
up vote
0
down vote
I would factorize this into two separate issues.
First, fairness. You seem to think this person is much less qualified than you, and yet she got admitted and is even paid more. A few points to consider:
- Your are not privy to the reason(s) she was admitted. She may be strong in other areas. You do not have enough evidence to say that admitting her was a mistake / unfair.
- In many departments (particularly non-top-tier ones), candidates are admitted in the hope that they will show more aptitude for graduate study than they did as an undergraduate. Sometimes this bet works out, sometimes it doesn't. It may simply be that admitting her was a gamble that didn't pay off (or simply a mistake). In this case, the professors are likely also unhappy, but not much can be done at this point.
- I'd like to think that most departments wouldn't purposefully admit someone who is unqualified. That said, many departments have too many qualified candidates, and choose to give preference to candidates with different backgrounds. For better or for worse, academia in many countries operates this way, and you will have to get used to it at some level.
Second, concern about your own performance. My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear. These are separate issues, and you should treat them as such. However, it may be that there is real reason for concern about your school (in which case you should reconsider your options there), or it may be that this is an irrational but persistent fear (in which case the way to "get over it" may involve counseling, etc.).
answered 30 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
I would factorize this into two separate issues.
First, fairness. You seem to think this person is much less qualified than you, and yet she got admitted and is even paid more. A few points to consider:
- Your are not privy to the reason(s) she was admitted. She may be strong in other areas. You do not have enough evidence to say that admitting her was a mistake / unfair.
- In many departments (particularly non-top-tier ones), candidates are admitted in the hope that they will show more aptitude for graduate study than they did as an undergraduate. Sometimes this bet works out, sometimes it doesn't. It may simply be that admitting her was a gamble that didn't pay off (or simply a mistake). In this case, the professors are likely also unhappy, but not much can be done at this point.
- I'd like to think that most departments wouldn't purposefully admit someone who is unqualified. That said, many departments have too many qualified candidates, and choose to give preference to candidates with different backgrounds. For better or for worse, academia in many countries operates this way, and you will have to get used to it at some level.
Second, concern about your own performance. My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear. These are separate issues, and you should treat them as such. However, it may be that there is real reason for concern about your school (in which case you should reconsider your options there), or it may be that this is an irrational but persistent fear (in which case the way to "get over it" may involve counseling, etc.).
answered 30 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
answered 30 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
answered 30 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
answered 30 mins ago
cag51
7,50531839
7,50531839
"My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear." This is kind of true, I guess. :
– Anonymous Watermelon
3 mins ago
add a comment |Â
"My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear." This is kind of true, I guess. :
– Anonymous Watermelon
3 mins ago
"My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear." This is kind of true, I guess. :
– Anonymous Watermelon
3 mins ago
"My guess is that you have been concerned for some time about whether your university is "good enough," and this poorly-qualified person has caused you to revisit this fear." This is kind of true, I guess. :
– Anonymous Watermelon
3 mins ago
add a comment |Â
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
Anonymous Watermelon is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
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6
It seems that, without any particular evidence, you have jumped to the conclusion that your colleague's higher pay is because of her gender. You're apparently a scientist; is that a scientific conclusion? Correlation is not causation.
– Nate Eldredge
2 hours ago
That is true. To be honest, before coming here, I thought I would see everyone better than me or equal to me. Not someone from the same lab, who constantly asks the similar basic questions over and over again. I thought, I would be one asking questions to the labmats and learn from them. I thought, I would distance myself from her so that I am not asked that many questions. Turns out, we are taking the same courses as well.....
– Anonymous Watermelon
2 hours ago
2
What "system"? What discipline? Academia is not monolithic and, shock horror, varies across both disciplines and countries.
– Yemon Choi
2 hours ago
...and even between different universities in the same country, different departments at the same university, and different research groups in the same department.
– JeffE
1 hour ago
2
I want to gently point out that a couple of your questions sound very insecure.
– Dawn
1 hour ago