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How to talk to an oblivious boss who takes calls in bathroom unmuted
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My boss has a bad habit of leaving his phone unmuted when on a conference call. Usually, we hear some background keyboard noise or some throat clearing noise, and somebody politely asks everyone to go on mute. Half of the time he ignores the request, probably because he's not fully listening.
Recently, it's gotten to the next level of awkward as he's started taking his headset into the bathroom with him. To give you a sense of how awkward this is, yesterday everybody on the call heard bodily functions accompanied with quiet moaning with the occasional "oh man", followed by a loud flush.
A lot of my peers find this funny, but I'm just embarrassed for my boss. I've tried leaving all sorts of hints like "Hey boss, don't forget to mute your phone!" and "I was hearing some weird noises that might be coming from your phone, do you mind muting next time when you not talking?" But he just smiles and says "thanks for the reminder!", and then forgets again.
I feel like somebody needs to have a blunt conversation with him, but I'm fearful to do so myself because I know it will be very awkward and uncomfortable. Is it my place to have this conversation with him? If so, how can I tactfully bring this up with him? (If I'm vague, I fear he won't understand what I'm saying, but I really don't want to have to tell him "everybody can hear you taking a dump").
professionalism manager meetings conference-call
edited 2 mins ago
jcmack
5,2381931
asked 2 hours ago
Pokeman432
291
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Pokeman432 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
 |Â
show 3 more comments
up vote
5
down vote
favorite
My boss has a bad habit of leaving his phone unmuted when on a conference call. Usually, we hear some background keyboard noise or some throat clearing noise, and somebody politely asks everyone to go on mute. Half of the time he ignores the request, probably because he's not fully listening.
Recently, it's gotten to the next level of awkward as he's started taking his headset into the bathroom with him. To give you a sense of how awkward this is, yesterday everybody on the call heard bodily functions accompanied with quiet moaning with the occasional "oh man", followed by a loud flush.
A lot of my peers find this funny, but I'm just embarrassed for my boss. I've tried leaving all sorts of hints like "Hey boss, don't forget to mute your phone!" and "I was hearing some weird noises that might be coming from your phone, do you mind muting next time when you not talking?" But he just smiles and says "thanks for the reminder!", and then forgets again.
I feel like somebody needs to have a blunt conversation with him, but I'm fearful to do so myself because I know it will be very awkward and uncomfortable. Is it my place to have this conversation with him? If so, how can I tactfully bring this up with him? (If I'm vague, I fear he won't understand what I'm saying, but I really don't want to have to tell him "everybody can hear you taking a dump").
professionalism manager meetings conference-call
edited 2 mins ago
jcmack
5,2381931
asked 2 hours ago
Pokeman432
291
New contributor
Pokeman432 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
1
Are you the only person on the calls with him? Has he ever done this with one of his superiors on the call?
– Kent A.
2 hours ago
4
I'm just waiting for the day when Push To Talk becomes mandatory for all business meetings
– rath
2 hours ago
1
this is amazing
– atxgis
2 hours ago
1
What kind of relationship do you have with your boss? If it's common in your shop to "talk truth to power" then presumably your boss would welcome your bluntness. If not, then you'll just have to bear things as they are.
– Joe Strazzere
2 hours ago
2
@rath - Pushing while he's talking seems to be part of the problem here...
– ItWasLikeThatWhenIGotHere
1 hour ago
 |Â
show 3 more comments
up vote
5
down vote
favorite
up vote
5
down vote
favorite
My boss has a bad habit of leaving his phone unmuted when on a conference call. Usually, we hear some background keyboard noise or some throat clearing noise, and somebody politely asks everyone to go on mute. Half of the time he ignores the request, probably because he's not fully listening.
Recently, it's gotten to the next level of awkward as he's started taking his headset into the bathroom with him. To give you a sense of how awkward this is, yesterday everybody on the call heard bodily functions accompanied with quiet moaning with the occasional "oh man", followed by a loud flush.
A lot of my peers find this funny, but I'm just embarrassed for my boss. I've tried leaving all sorts of hints like "Hey boss, don't forget to mute your phone!" and "I was hearing some weird noises that might be coming from your phone, do you mind muting next time when you not talking?" But he just smiles and says "thanks for the reminder!", and then forgets again.
I feel like somebody needs to have a blunt conversation with him, but I'm fearful to do so myself because I know it will be very awkward and uncomfortable. Is it my place to have this conversation with him? If so, how can I tactfully bring this up with him? (If I'm vague, I fear he won't understand what I'm saying, but I really don't want to have to tell him "everybody can hear you taking a dump").
professionalism manager meetings conference-call
edited 2 mins ago
jcmack
5,2381931
asked 2 hours ago
Pokeman432
291
New contributor
Pokeman432 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
My boss has a bad habit of leaving his phone unmuted when on a conference call. Usually, we hear some background keyboard noise or some throat clearing noise, and somebody politely asks everyone to go on mute. Half of the time he ignores the request, probably because he's not fully listening.
Recently, it's gotten to the next level of awkward as he's started taking his headset into the bathroom with him. To give you a sense of how awkward this is, yesterday everybody on the call heard bodily functions accompanied with quiet moaning with the occasional "oh man", followed by a loud flush.
A lot of my peers find this funny, but I'm just embarrassed for my boss. I've tried leaving all sorts of hints like "Hey boss, don't forget to mute your phone!" and "I was hearing some weird noises that might be coming from your phone, do you mind muting next time when you not talking?" But he just smiles and says "thanks for the reminder!", and then forgets again.
I feel like somebody needs to have a blunt conversation with him, but I'm fearful to do so myself because I know it will be very awkward and uncomfortable. Is it my place to have this conversation with him? If so, how can I tactfully bring this up with him? (If I'm vague, I fear he won't understand what I'm saying, but I really don't want to have to tell him "everybody can hear you taking a dump").
professionalism manager meetings conference-call
professionalism manager meetings conference-call
edited 2 mins ago
jcmack
5,2381931
asked 2 hours ago
Pokeman432
291
New contributor
Pokeman432 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
edited 2 mins ago
jcmack
5,2381931
asked 2 hours ago
Pokeman432
291
New contributor
Pokeman432 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
edited 2 mins ago
jcmack
5,2381931
edited 2 mins ago
jcmack
5,2381931
edited 2 mins ago
jcmack
5,2381931
5,2381931
asked 2 hours ago
Pokeman432
291
New contributor
Pokeman432 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
asked 2 hours ago
Pokeman432
291
asked 2 hours ago
Pokeman432
291
291
New contributor
Pokeman432 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
New contributor
Pokeman432 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
Pokeman432 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
1
Are you the only person on the calls with him? Has he ever done this with one of his superiors on the call?
– Kent A.
2 hours ago
4
I'm just waiting for the day when Push To Talk becomes mandatory for all business meetings
– rath
2 hours ago
1
this is amazing
– atxgis
2 hours ago
1
What kind of relationship do you have with your boss? If it's common in your shop to "talk truth to power" then presumably your boss would welcome your bluntness. If not, then you'll just have to bear things as they are.
– Joe Strazzere
2 hours ago
2
@rath - Pushing while he's talking seems to be part of the problem here...
– ItWasLikeThatWhenIGotHere
1 hour ago
 |Â
show 3 more comments
1
Are you the only person on the calls with him? Has he ever done this with one of his superiors on the call?
– Kent A.
2 hours ago
4
I'm just waiting for the day when Push To Talk becomes mandatory for all business meetings
– rath
2 hours ago
1
this is amazing
– atxgis
2 hours ago
1
What kind of relationship do you have with your boss? If it's common in your shop to "talk truth to power" then presumably your boss would welcome your bluntness. If not, then you'll just have to bear things as they are.
– Joe Strazzere
2 hours ago
2
@rath - Pushing while he's talking seems to be part of the problem here...
– ItWasLikeThatWhenIGotHere
1 hour ago
1
1
Are you the only person on the calls with him? Has he ever done this with one of his superiors on the call?
– Kent A.
2 hours ago
Are you the only person on the calls with him? Has he ever done this with one of his superiors on the call?
– Kent A.
2 hours ago
4
4
I'm just waiting for the day when Push To Talk becomes mandatory for all business meetings
– rath
2 hours ago
I'm just waiting for the day when Push To Talk becomes mandatory for all business meetings
– rath
2 hours ago
1
1
this is amazing
– atxgis
2 hours ago
this is amazing
– atxgis
2 hours ago
1
1
What kind of relationship do you have with your boss? If it's common in your shop to "talk truth to power" then presumably your boss would welcome your bluntness. If not, then you'll just have to bear things as they are.
– Joe Strazzere
2 hours ago
What kind of relationship do you have with your boss? If it's common in your shop to "talk truth to power" then presumably your boss would welcome your bluntness. If not, then you'll just have to bear things as they are.
– Joe Strazzere
2 hours ago
2
2
@rath - Pushing while he's talking seems to be part of the problem here...
– ItWasLikeThatWhenIGotHere
1 hour ago
@rath - Pushing while he's talking seems to be part of the problem here...
– ItWasLikeThatWhenIGotHere
1 hour ago
 |Â
show 3 more comments
3 Answers
3
active
oldest
votes
up vote
4
down vote
It's not your place to be blunt with him. You've given him some kindly reminders. If he embarrasses himself or your company, it's on him. His superiors should deal with it more directly. If they are unaware of it, you might let them know what's going on so they can be more attentive.
answered 2 hours ago
Kent A.
20.2k85878
1
I don't think going above the Bosses head is a good idea.
– SaggingRufus
43 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
Boss or non boss, if anything in the call distracts attention while it can be avoided by simply muting the phone, I would state it out loud when the disturbance happens.
Turning it jokingly, you could say something like:
I'm not sure who we're hearing right now but I would advise to eat some fibers
or
Wow the noises we're hearing right now leave no room for imagination!
Staying professional, you could simply state
Can I please ask to anybody to mute themselves when not speaking cause the background noises are making it hard to stay focussed
Now from where I see it HE should be the one to feel uncomfortable, hence ensuring this doesn't happen in the future. At least I know if it happened to me I would be checking twice I'm on mute the next time I go to the restroom. I happened to burp once thinking I was on mute and while I quickly realized my mistake (because of some quick remarks) I was very glad we were many participants and nobody could know it was me, and very careful afterwards.
answered 2 hours ago
Laurent S.
1,113610
-1 or just kick the guy from the call. Everyone knows what's going on, there's no need to draw attention to it
– rath
1 hour ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
Conference calls have their own etiquette, which some people never seem to pick up or internalize. It sounds like your boss is one of those, and so general reminders are not likely to suddenly become more effective.
My best advice (which, in my experience, doesn't always work) is to mention muting microphones at the start of the call. You can use any lead-in you like, it mostly doesn't matter because you are just reminding people that they can, and should, press the mute button.
Hi everyone! I think I forgot to press "mute" last time, so I'm sorry if anyone heard any clicking or breathing or anything. But I put a post-it on my phone, and I won't forget this time!
It won't work well over extended periods of time, because eventually it will be clear that you, yourself, aren't forgetting. If your boss figures out that it's worthwhile, things might improve. If your boss never figures it out, then there may not be much a subordinate can do.
answered 19 mins ago
Upper_Case
56116
add a comment |Â
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3 Answers
3
active
oldest
votes
3 Answers
3
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
up vote
4
down vote
It's not your place to be blunt with him. You've given him some kindly reminders. If he embarrasses himself or your company, it's on him. His superiors should deal with it more directly. If they are unaware of it, you might let them know what's going on so they can be more attentive.
answered 2 hours ago
Kent A.
20.2k85878
1
I don't think going above the Bosses head is a good idea.
– SaggingRufus
43 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
4
down vote
It's not your place to be blunt with him. You've given him some kindly reminders. If he embarrasses himself or your company, it's on him. His superiors should deal with it more directly. If they are unaware of it, you might let them know what's going on so they can be more attentive.
answered 2 hours ago
Kent A.
20.2k85878
1
I don't think going above the Bosses head is a good idea.
– SaggingRufus
43 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
4
down vote
up vote
4
down vote
It's not your place to be blunt with him. You've given him some kindly reminders. If he embarrasses himself or your company, it's on him. His superiors should deal with it more directly. If they are unaware of it, you might let them know what's going on so they can be more attentive.
answered 2 hours ago
Kent A.
20.2k85878
It's not your place to be blunt with him. You've given him some kindly reminders. If he embarrasses himself or your company, it's on him. His superiors should deal with it more directly. If they are unaware of it, you might let them know what's going on so they can be more attentive.
answered 2 hours ago
Kent A.
20.2k85878
answered 2 hours ago
Kent A.
20.2k85878
answered 2 hours ago
Kent A.
20.2k85878
answered 2 hours ago
Kent A.
20.2k85878
20.2k85878
1
I don't think going above the Bosses head is a good idea.
– SaggingRufus
43 mins ago
add a comment |Â
1
I don't think going above the Bosses head is a good idea.
– SaggingRufus
43 mins ago
1
1
I don't think going above the Bosses head is a good idea.
– SaggingRufus
43 mins ago
I don't think going above the Bosses head is a good idea.
– SaggingRufus
43 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
Boss or non boss, if anything in the call distracts attention while it can be avoided by simply muting the phone, I would state it out loud when the disturbance happens.
Turning it jokingly, you could say something like:
I'm not sure who we're hearing right now but I would advise to eat some fibers
or
Wow the noises we're hearing right now leave no room for imagination!
Staying professional, you could simply state
Can I please ask to anybody to mute themselves when not speaking cause the background noises are making it hard to stay focussed
Now from where I see it HE should be the one to feel uncomfortable, hence ensuring this doesn't happen in the future. At least I know if it happened to me I would be checking twice I'm on mute the next time I go to the restroom. I happened to burp once thinking I was on mute and while I quickly realized my mistake (because of some quick remarks) I was very glad we were many participants and nobody could know it was me, and very careful afterwards.
answered 2 hours ago
Laurent S.
1,113610
-1 or just kick the guy from the call. Everyone knows what's going on, there's no need to draw attention to it
– rath
1 hour ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
Boss or non boss, if anything in the call distracts attention while it can be avoided by simply muting the phone, I would state it out loud when the disturbance happens.
Turning it jokingly, you could say something like:
I'm not sure who we're hearing right now but I would advise to eat some fibers
or
Wow the noises we're hearing right now leave no room for imagination!
Staying professional, you could simply state
Can I please ask to anybody to mute themselves when not speaking cause the background noises are making it hard to stay focussed
Now from where I see it HE should be the one to feel uncomfortable, hence ensuring this doesn't happen in the future. At least I know if it happened to me I would be checking twice I'm on mute the next time I go to the restroom. I happened to burp once thinking I was on mute and while I quickly realized my mistake (because of some quick remarks) I was very glad we were many participants and nobody could know it was me, and very careful afterwards.
answered 2 hours ago
Laurent S.
1,113610
-1 or just kick the guy from the call. Everyone knows what's going on, there's no need to draw attention to it
– rath
1 hour ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
up vote
0
down vote
Boss or non boss, if anything in the call distracts attention while it can be avoided by simply muting the phone, I would state it out loud when the disturbance happens.
Turning it jokingly, you could say something like:
I'm not sure who we're hearing right now but I would advise to eat some fibers
or
Wow the noises we're hearing right now leave no room for imagination!
Staying professional, you could simply state
Can I please ask to anybody to mute themselves when not speaking cause the background noises are making it hard to stay focussed
Now from where I see it HE should be the one to feel uncomfortable, hence ensuring this doesn't happen in the future. At least I know if it happened to me I would be checking twice I'm on mute the next time I go to the restroom. I happened to burp once thinking I was on mute and while I quickly realized my mistake (because of some quick remarks) I was very glad we were many participants and nobody could know it was me, and very careful afterwards.
answered 2 hours ago
Laurent S.
1,113610
Boss or non boss, if anything in the call distracts attention while it can be avoided by simply muting the phone, I would state it out loud when the disturbance happens.
Turning it jokingly, you could say something like:
I'm not sure who we're hearing right now but I would advise to eat some fibers
or
Wow the noises we're hearing right now leave no room for imagination!
Staying professional, you could simply state
Can I please ask to anybody to mute themselves when not speaking cause the background noises are making it hard to stay focussed
Now from where I see it HE should be the one to feel uncomfortable, hence ensuring this doesn't happen in the future. At least I know if it happened to me I would be checking twice I'm on mute the next time I go to the restroom. I happened to burp once thinking I was on mute and while I quickly realized my mistake (because of some quick remarks) I was very glad we were many participants and nobody could know it was me, and very careful afterwards.
answered 2 hours ago
Laurent S.
1,113610
edited 2 hours ago
answered 2 hours ago
Laurent S.
1,113610
answered 2 hours ago
Laurent S.
1,113610
answered 2 hours ago
Laurent S.
1,113610
1,113610
-1 or just kick the guy from the call. Everyone knows what's going on, there's no need to draw attention to it
– rath
1 hour ago
add a comment |Â
-1 or just kick the guy from the call. Everyone knows what's going on, there's no need to draw attention to it
– rath
1 hour ago
-1 or just kick the guy from the call. Everyone knows what's going on, there's no need to draw attention to it
– rath
1 hour ago
-1 or just kick the guy from the call. Everyone knows what's going on, there's no need to draw attention to it
– rath
1 hour ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
Conference calls have their own etiquette, which some people never seem to pick up or internalize. It sounds like your boss is one of those, and so general reminders are not likely to suddenly become more effective.
My best advice (which, in my experience, doesn't always work) is to mention muting microphones at the start of the call. You can use any lead-in you like, it mostly doesn't matter because you are just reminding people that they can, and should, press the mute button.
Hi everyone! I think I forgot to press "mute" last time, so I'm sorry if anyone heard any clicking or breathing or anything. But I put a post-it on my phone, and I won't forget this time!
It won't work well over extended periods of time, because eventually it will be clear that you, yourself, aren't forgetting. If your boss figures out that it's worthwhile, things might improve. If your boss never figures it out, then there may not be much a subordinate can do.
answered 19 mins ago
Upper_Case
56116
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
Conference calls have their own etiquette, which some people never seem to pick up or internalize. It sounds like your boss is one of those, and so general reminders are not likely to suddenly become more effective.
My best advice (which, in my experience, doesn't always work) is to mention muting microphones at the start of the call. You can use any lead-in you like, it mostly doesn't matter because you are just reminding people that they can, and should, press the mute button.
Hi everyone! I think I forgot to press "mute" last time, so I'm sorry if anyone heard any clicking or breathing or anything. But I put a post-it on my phone, and I won't forget this time!
It won't work well over extended periods of time, because eventually it will be clear that you, yourself, aren't forgetting. If your boss figures out that it's worthwhile, things might improve. If your boss never figures it out, then there may not be much a subordinate can do.
answered 19 mins ago
Upper_Case
56116
add a comment |Â
up vote
0
down vote
up vote
0
down vote
Conference calls have their own etiquette, which some people never seem to pick up or internalize. It sounds like your boss is one of those, and so general reminders are not likely to suddenly become more effective.
My best advice (which, in my experience, doesn't always work) is to mention muting microphones at the start of the call. You can use any lead-in you like, it mostly doesn't matter because you are just reminding people that they can, and should, press the mute button.
Hi everyone! I think I forgot to press "mute" last time, so I'm sorry if anyone heard any clicking or breathing or anything. But I put a post-it on my phone, and I won't forget this time!
It won't work well over extended periods of time, because eventually it will be clear that you, yourself, aren't forgetting. If your boss figures out that it's worthwhile, things might improve. If your boss never figures it out, then there may not be much a subordinate can do.
answered 19 mins ago
Upper_Case
56116
Conference calls have their own etiquette, which some people never seem to pick up or internalize. It sounds like your boss is one of those, and so general reminders are not likely to suddenly become more effective.
My best advice (which, in my experience, doesn't always work) is to mention muting microphones at the start of the call. You can use any lead-in you like, it mostly doesn't matter because you are just reminding people that they can, and should, press the mute button.
Hi everyone! I think I forgot to press "mute" last time, so I'm sorry if anyone heard any clicking or breathing or anything. But I put a post-it on my phone, and I won't forget this time!
It won't work well over extended periods of time, because eventually it will be clear that you, yourself, aren't forgetting. If your boss figures out that it's worthwhile, things might improve. If your boss never figures it out, then there may not be much a subordinate can do.
answered 19 mins ago
Upper_Case
56116
answered 19 mins ago
Upper_Case
56116
answered 19 mins ago
Upper_Case
56116
answered 19 mins ago
Upper_Case
56116
56116
add a comment |Â
add a comment |Â
Pokeman432 is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
Pokeman432 is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
Pokeman432 is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
Pokeman432 is a new contributor. Be nice, and check out our Code of Conduct.
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1
Are you the only person on the calls with him? Has he ever done this with one of his superiors on the call?
– Kent A.
2 hours ago
4
I'm just waiting for the day when Push To Talk becomes mandatory for all business meetings
– rath
2 hours ago
1
this is amazing
– atxgis
2 hours ago
1
What kind of relationship do you have with your boss? If it's common in your shop to "talk truth to power" then presumably your boss would welcome your bluntness. If not, then you'll just have to bear things as they are.
– Joe Strazzere
2 hours ago
2
@rath - Pushing while he's talking seems to be part of the problem here...
– ItWasLikeThatWhenIGotHere
1 hour ago