How do you deal with colleagues, acquaintances asking you for knowledge that you gained with months of effort?

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I'm pretty sure that these are things that we all face. Let's say that you spent months researching about something (be it moving from full time job to being a freelancer, creating a website, starting a business etc). There are colleagues who don't speak to you, but want to learn how they can do what you did from you with no other interest in you.



Let's take the case of starting a non-commercial website. I asked my friends, acquaintances and none of them could help me out with any info. Next I spent months in researching various ways I could build a site, various hosting sites, how to go about hosting my site, designing it, what software to use, what customizations to apply. This was apart from my 80 hour work weeks.



After months of constant effort and sacrificing other goals I was able to publish my website. And now people just walk up to me, comment on how great the site is, and then want to know what specific software I have used to create my site. Once I answer it, they quiz me around various other topics around how they can create it themselves. After their queries are answered they walk off, never to speak to me again.



Hence, I do not feel like sharing this info with someone who's not interested in making a connection with me. Also, it's because I have sacrificed a lot of energy into getting it. If a good friend of mine asks me then I'm more than happy to share whatever I have learnt. However, when colleagues or acquaintances ask me about what API, tools, software my website is based on then I don't want to declare it to them because they haven't built up enough friendship with me to deserve the fruits of my labor.



How do you not reveal info when colleagues or acquaintances ask you about something without being mean to them?










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  • To rule out the 'simplest' answer of 'don't tell them you have a website to begin with' > How did your co-workers/acquaintances find out about your website to begin with? I'm guessing just not telling them you have one didn't work?
    – Tinkeringbell♦
    33 mins ago











  • Also... I'm curious how you do answer their questions, do you make it a bit chatty or just business? Questions about something you did can be a way to start a friendship, but business-like answers might have conveyed a disinterest in developing one from your side, hence the co-workers never speaking to you again...
    – Tinkeringbell♦
    29 mins ago














up vote
3
down vote

favorite












I'm pretty sure that these are things that we all face. Let's say that you spent months researching about something (be it moving from full time job to being a freelancer, creating a website, starting a business etc). There are colleagues who don't speak to you, but want to learn how they can do what you did from you with no other interest in you.



Let's take the case of starting a non-commercial website. I asked my friends, acquaintances and none of them could help me out with any info. Next I spent months in researching various ways I could build a site, various hosting sites, how to go about hosting my site, designing it, what software to use, what customizations to apply. This was apart from my 80 hour work weeks.



After months of constant effort and sacrificing other goals I was able to publish my website. And now people just walk up to me, comment on how great the site is, and then want to know what specific software I have used to create my site. Once I answer it, they quiz me around various other topics around how they can create it themselves. After their queries are answered they walk off, never to speak to me again.



Hence, I do not feel like sharing this info with someone who's not interested in making a connection with me. Also, it's because I have sacrificed a lot of energy into getting it. If a good friend of mine asks me then I'm more than happy to share whatever I have learnt. However, when colleagues or acquaintances ask me about what API, tools, software my website is based on then I don't want to declare it to them because they haven't built up enough friendship with me to deserve the fruits of my labor.



How do you not reveal info when colleagues or acquaintances ask you about something without being mean to them?










share|improve this question





















  • To rule out the 'simplest' answer of 'don't tell them you have a website to begin with' > How did your co-workers/acquaintances find out about your website to begin with? I'm guessing just not telling them you have one didn't work?
    – Tinkeringbell♦
    33 mins ago











  • Also... I'm curious how you do answer their questions, do you make it a bit chatty or just business? Questions about something you did can be a way to start a friendship, but business-like answers might have conveyed a disinterest in developing one from your side, hence the co-workers never speaking to you again...
    – Tinkeringbell♦
    29 mins ago












up vote
3
down vote

favorite









up vote
3
down vote

favorite











I'm pretty sure that these are things that we all face. Let's say that you spent months researching about something (be it moving from full time job to being a freelancer, creating a website, starting a business etc). There are colleagues who don't speak to you, but want to learn how they can do what you did from you with no other interest in you.



Let's take the case of starting a non-commercial website. I asked my friends, acquaintances and none of them could help me out with any info. Next I spent months in researching various ways I could build a site, various hosting sites, how to go about hosting my site, designing it, what software to use, what customizations to apply. This was apart from my 80 hour work weeks.



After months of constant effort and sacrificing other goals I was able to publish my website. And now people just walk up to me, comment on how great the site is, and then want to know what specific software I have used to create my site. Once I answer it, they quiz me around various other topics around how they can create it themselves. After their queries are answered they walk off, never to speak to me again.



Hence, I do not feel like sharing this info with someone who's not interested in making a connection with me. Also, it's because I have sacrificed a lot of energy into getting it. If a good friend of mine asks me then I'm more than happy to share whatever I have learnt. However, when colleagues or acquaintances ask me about what API, tools, software my website is based on then I don't want to declare it to them because they haven't built up enough friendship with me to deserve the fruits of my labor.



How do you not reveal info when colleagues or acquaintances ask you about something without being mean to them?










share|improve this question













I'm pretty sure that these are things that we all face. Let's say that you spent months researching about something (be it moving from full time job to being a freelancer, creating a website, starting a business etc). There are colleagues who don't speak to you, but want to learn how they can do what you did from you with no other interest in you.



Let's take the case of starting a non-commercial website. I asked my friends, acquaintances and none of them could help me out with any info. Next I spent months in researching various ways I could build a site, various hosting sites, how to go about hosting my site, designing it, what software to use, what customizations to apply. This was apart from my 80 hour work weeks.



After months of constant effort and sacrificing other goals I was able to publish my website. And now people just walk up to me, comment on how great the site is, and then want to know what specific software I have used to create my site. Once I answer it, they quiz me around various other topics around how they can create it themselves. After their queries are answered they walk off, never to speak to me again.



Hence, I do not feel like sharing this info with someone who's not interested in making a connection with me. Also, it's because I have sacrificed a lot of energy into getting it. If a good friend of mine asks me then I'm more than happy to share whatever I have learnt. However, when colleagues or acquaintances ask me about what API, tools, software my website is based on then I don't want to declare it to them because they haven't built up enough friendship with me to deserve the fruits of my labor.



How do you not reveal info when colleagues or acquaintances ask you about something without being mean to them?







acquaintances colleagues






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asked 45 mins ago









Mugen

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  • To rule out the 'simplest' answer of 'don't tell them you have a website to begin with' > How did your co-workers/acquaintances find out about your website to begin with? I'm guessing just not telling them you have one didn't work?
    – Tinkeringbell♦
    33 mins ago











  • Also... I'm curious how you do answer their questions, do you make it a bit chatty or just business? Questions about something you did can be a way to start a friendship, but business-like answers might have conveyed a disinterest in developing one from your side, hence the co-workers never speaking to you again...
    – Tinkeringbell♦
    29 mins ago
















  • To rule out the 'simplest' answer of 'don't tell them you have a website to begin with' > How did your co-workers/acquaintances find out about your website to begin with? I'm guessing just not telling them you have one didn't work?
    – Tinkeringbell♦
    33 mins ago











  • Also... I'm curious how you do answer their questions, do you make it a bit chatty or just business? Questions about something you did can be a way to start a friendship, but business-like answers might have conveyed a disinterest in developing one from your side, hence the co-workers never speaking to you again...
    – Tinkeringbell♦
    29 mins ago















To rule out the 'simplest' answer of 'don't tell them you have a website to begin with' > How did your co-workers/acquaintances find out about your website to begin with? I'm guessing just not telling them you have one didn't work?
– Tinkeringbell♦
33 mins ago





To rule out the 'simplest' answer of 'don't tell them you have a website to begin with' > How did your co-workers/acquaintances find out about your website to begin with? I'm guessing just not telling them you have one didn't work?
– Tinkeringbell♦
33 mins ago













Also... I'm curious how you do answer their questions, do you make it a bit chatty or just business? Questions about something you did can be a way to start a friendship, but business-like answers might have conveyed a disinterest in developing one from your side, hence the co-workers never speaking to you again...
– Tinkeringbell♦
29 mins ago




Also... I'm curious how you do answer their questions, do you make it a bit chatty or just business? Questions about something you did can be a way to start a friendship, but business-like answers might have conveyed a disinterest in developing one from your side, hence the co-workers never speaking to you again...
– Tinkeringbell♦
29 mins ago










4 Answers
4






active

oldest

votes

















up vote
4
down vote













Welcome to StackExchange, a website where strangers can ask for and provide months worth of knowledge to others around the world, without any interest in the person behind the account.



Can you imagine everybody on the internet had the attitude of "Well, I spend loads of time figuring this out, so why would I provide this information freely?"? There would be no tutorials, no documentation and no StackExchange.



This doesn't mean that you should freely provide everything to know, but it stands to help to be a slight bit more helpful. You say you spent a lot of time looking for the right approach. Point them to the information you found that led you to what you made. You don't necessarily have to share the information itself, but sharing the source of the information can be really helpful without costing a lot of effort from your part.



So point them towards a tutorial or a knowledge base of the software/whatever that you used.






share|improve this answer




















  • lol I think you beat me with a few seconds to the answer
    – Ontamu
    28 mins ago










  • @Ontamu actually, the timestamps are the exact same second :D
    – JAD
    27 mins ago






  • 1




    Maybe you can also tell them (try to deflect) that: 1. it takes too much time to explain to them, as much time that it took you to search and understand 2. you can't make the choice for them, so they have to read what you've read yourself. TL:DR: show the shelves in the library, recommend some books, don't read it for them :)
    – OldPadawan
    25 mins ago











  • @OldPadawan give a man a fish...
    – JAD
    24 mins ago










  • @JAD: that's the point yeah ;)
    – OldPadawan
    23 mins ago

















up vote
0
down vote













If you feel the need to avoid sharing your knowledge and experiences with your colleagues - which I think is a shame - then direct them to online resources (articles / tutorials) which would enable you to help them help themselves. If they want direct help then let them know you're busy and might be able to help them later in the day, or later that week.



I believe there's a lot of value to being someone who people come to for help. If it's having an impact on your workload then of course, speak to your manager about it for advice. He might give you the power to say no to people at busy times. I'd imagine he'd rather you help others than not though.



In my experience, knowledge in one particular area lead to me being called upon by lots of people throughout the organisation for assistance... and this was getting in the way of the work I was there to do. It took time and sharing / documenting my knowledge in that field to pass the baton on but this was a good thing for my project, good for me personally, and good for the wider organisation.



I know it's hard at times feeling "used" by colleagues but oftentimes people go to work to work and get things done and see others around them as resources to getting that work done. It's not personal - they're not being heartless or mean - it's just the way some are.



And the interpersonal connections will come in time, if you and the other people want that to happen. Be friendly when helping people and it'll naturally follow.






share|improve this answer



























    up vote
    0
    down vote













    This remembers me of some classmate that ask to see my homework without anything in return. It was like I busted my ass to do my homework and they get to see the solution for free.



    I suggest taking this last word literally and see this as unpaid work. After all, they are asking you information on a topic you rather not talk about and are taking your time without nothing for you in return.



    So, what I would suggest you do is:



    • Allow them to ask a couple of question. They might just be polite by showing interest.


    • When you feel that they have asked enough question, tell them that:



    I'm sorry but I'm not really interested in talking about this. Can we talk about X/something else instead?




    It's okay to not be interested in speaking about something and suggesting to talk about something show that you are open to speaking with them, just not about your website.



    Alternatively, if they are really interested in building a website, you can propose to them a "private class" where you will act as a teacher in return for some money.






    share|improve this answer



























      up vote
      0
      down vote













      An approach that would work nicely in your situation is to just point them to where you got your research done. For example to the question of "What software did you use to create it?" you can say something like: "Oh there are hundreds of options for that, I read about it on ...... .com. Different options are explained there better than I could explain them to you, you should check it out.".



      This way you are not totally brushing them off and you are referring people to the sources that helped you which will also help the creators of those sources. If you feel someone is close enough to go into more details.



      I think this would work as it is giving people a starting point, which is what they need.



      I have a better answer too but your only interest in me is my expertise on this topic and I have spend a lot of time to get it so I am not telling.






      share|improve this answer






















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        4 Answers
        4






        active

        oldest

        votes








        4 Answers
        4






        active

        oldest

        votes









        active

        oldest

        votes






        active

        oldest

        votes








        up vote
        4
        down vote













        Welcome to StackExchange, a website where strangers can ask for and provide months worth of knowledge to others around the world, without any interest in the person behind the account.



        Can you imagine everybody on the internet had the attitude of "Well, I spend loads of time figuring this out, so why would I provide this information freely?"? There would be no tutorials, no documentation and no StackExchange.



        This doesn't mean that you should freely provide everything to know, but it stands to help to be a slight bit more helpful. You say you spent a lot of time looking for the right approach. Point them to the information you found that led you to what you made. You don't necessarily have to share the information itself, but sharing the source of the information can be really helpful without costing a lot of effort from your part.



        So point them towards a tutorial or a knowledge base of the software/whatever that you used.






        share|improve this answer




















        • lol I think you beat me with a few seconds to the answer
          – Ontamu
          28 mins ago










        • @Ontamu actually, the timestamps are the exact same second :D
          – JAD
          27 mins ago






        • 1




          Maybe you can also tell them (try to deflect) that: 1. it takes too much time to explain to them, as much time that it took you to search and understand 2. you can't make the choice for them, so they have to read what you've read yourself. TL:DR: show the shelves in the library, recommend some books, don't read it for them :)
          – OldPadawan
          25 mins ago











        • @OldPadawan give a man a fish...
          – JAD
          24 mins ago










        • @JAD: that's the point yeah ;)
          – OldPadawan
          23 mins ago














        up vote
        4
        down vote













        Welcome to StackExchange, a website where strangers can ask for and provide months worth of knowledge to others around the world, without any interest in the person behind the account.



        Can you imagine everybody on the internet had the attitude of "Well, I spend loads of time figuring this out, so why would I provide this information freely?"? There would be no tutorials, no documentation and no StackExchange.



        This doesn't mean that you should freely provide everything to know, but it stands to help to be a slight bit more helpful. You say you spent a lot of time looking for the right approach. Point them to the information you found that led you to what you made. You don't necessarily have to share the information itself, but sharing the source of the information can be really helpful without costing a lot of effort from your part.



        So point them towards a tutorial or a knowledge base of the software/whatever that you used.






        share|improve this answer




















        • lol I think you beat me with a few seconds to the answer
          – Ontamu
          28 mins ago










        • @Ontamu actually, the timestamps are the exact same second :D
          – JAD
          27 mins ago






        • 1




          Maybe you can also tell them (try to deflect) that: 1. it takes too much time to explain to them, as much time that it took you to search and understand 2. you can't make the choice for them, so they have to read what you've read yourself. TL:DR: show the shelves in the library, recommend some books, don't read it for them :)
          – OldPadawan
          25 mins ago











        • @OldPadawan give a man a fish...
          – JAD
          24 mins ago










        • @JAD: that's the point yeah ;)
          – OldPadawan
          23 mins ago












        up vote
        4
        down vote










        up vote
        4
        down vote









        Welcome to StackExchange, a website where strangers can ask for and provide months worth of knowledge to others around the world, without any interest in the person behind the account.



        Can you imagine everybody on the internet had the attitude of "Well, I spend loads of time figuring this out, so why would I provide this information freely?"? There would be no tutorials, no documentation and no StackExchange.



        This doesn't mean that you should freely provide everything to know, but it stands to help to be a slight bit more helpful. You say you spent a lot of time looking for the right approach. Point them to the information you found that led you to what you made. You don't necessarily have to share the information itself, but sharing the source of the information can be really helpful without costing a lot of effort from your part.



        So point them towards a tutorial or a knowledge base of the software/whatever that you used.






        share|improve this answer












        Welcome to StackExchange, a website where strangers can ask for and provide months worth of knowledge to others around the world, without any interest in the person behind the account.



        Can you imagine everybody on the internet had the attitude of "Well, I spend loads of time figuring this out, so why would I provide this information freely?"? There would be no tutorials, no documentation and no StackExchange.



        This doesn't mean that you should freely provide everything to know, but it stands to help to be a slight bit more helpful. You say you spent a lot of time looking for the right approach. Point them to the information you found that led you to what you made. You don't necessarily have to share the information itself, but sharing the source of the information can be really helpful without costing a lot of effort from your part.



        So point them towards a tutorial or a knowledge base of the software/whatever that you used.







        share|improve this answer












        share|improve this answer



        share|improve this answer










        answered 29 mins ago









        JAD

        4,38932343




        4,38932343











        • lol I think you beat me with a few seconds to the answer
          – Ontamu
          28 mins ago










        • @Ontamu actually, the timestamps are the exact same second :D
          – JAD
          27 mins ago






        • 1




          Maybe you can also tell them (try to deflect) that: 1. it takes too much time to explain to them, as much time that it took you to search and understand 2. you can't make the choice for them, so they have to read what you've read yourself. TL:DR: show the shelves in the library, recommend some books, don't read it for them :)
          – OldPadawan
          25 mins ago











        • @OldPadawan give a man a fish...
          – JAD
          24 mins ago










        • @JAD: that's the point yeah ;)
          – OldPadawan
          23 mins ago
















        • lol I think you beat me with a few seconds to the answer
          – Ontamu
          28 mins ago










        • @Ontamu actually, the timestamps are the exact same second :D
          – JAD
          27 mins ago






        • 1




          Maybe you can also tell them (try to deflect) that: 1. it takes too much time to explain to them, as much time that it took you to search and understand 2. you can't make the choice for them, so they have to read what you've read yourself. TL:DR: show the shelves in the library, recommend some books, don't read it for them :)
          – OldPadawan
          25 mins ago











        • @OldPadawan give a man a fish...
          – JAD
          24 mins ago










        • @JAD: that's the point yeah ;)
          – OldPadawan
          23 mins ago















        lol I think you beat me with a few seconds to the answer
        – Ontamu
        28 mins ago




        lol I think you beat me with a few seconds to the answer
        – Ontamu
        28 mins ago












        @Ontamu actually, the timestamps are the exact same second :D
        – JAD
        27 mins ago




        @Ontamu actually, the timestamps are the exact same second :D
        – JAD
        27 mins ago




        1




        1




        Maybe you can also tell them (try to deflect) that: 1. it takes too much time to explain to them, as much time that it took you to search and understand 2. you can't make the choice for them, so they have to read what you've read yourself. TL:DR: show the shelves in the library, recommend some books, don't read it for them :)
        – OldPadawan
        25 mins ago





        Maybe you can also tell them (try to deflect) that: 1. it takes too much time to explain to them, as much time that it took you to search and understand 2. you can't make the choice for them, so they have to read what you've read yourself. TL:DR: show the shelves in the library, recommend some books, don't read it for them :)
        – OldPadawan
        25 mins ago













        @OldPadawan give a man a fish...
        – JAD
        24 mins ago




        @OldPadawan give a man a fish...
        – JAD
        24 mins ago












        @JAD: that's the point yeah ;)
        – OldPadawan
        23 mins ago




        @JAD: that's the point yeah ;)
        – OldPadawan
        23 mins ago










        up vote
        0
        down vote













        If you feel the need to avoid sharing your knowledge and experiences with your colleagues - which I think is a shame - then direct them to online resources (articles / tutorials) which would enable you to help them help themselves. If they want direct help then let them know you're busy and might be able to help them later in the day, or later that week.



        I believe there's a lot of value to being someone who people come to for help. If it's having an impact on your workload then of course, speak to your manager about it for advice. He might give you the power to say no to people at busy times. I'd imagine he'd rather you help others than not though.



        In my experience, knowledge in one particular area lead to me being called upon by lots of people throughout the organisation for assistance... and this was getting in the way of the work I was there to do. It took time and sharing / documenting my knowledge in that field to pass the baton on but this was a good thing for my project, good for me personally, and good for the wider organisation.



        I know it's hard at times feeling "used" by colleagues but oftentimes people go to work to work and get things done and see others around them as resources to getting that work done. It's not personal - they're not being heartless or mean - it's just the way some are.



        And the interpersonal connections will come in time, if you and the other people want that to happen. Be friendly when helping people and it'll naturally follow.






        share|improve this answer
























          up vote
          0
          down vote













          If you feel the need to avoid sharing your knowledge and experiences with your colleagues - which I think is a shame - then direct them to online resources (articles / tutorials) which would enable you to help them help themselves. If they want direct help then let them know you're busy and might be able to help them later in the day, or later that week.



          I believe there's a lot of value to being someone who people come to for help. If it's having an impact on your workload then of course, speak to your manager about it for advice. He might give you the power to say no to people at busy times. I'd imagine he'd rather you help others than not though.



          In my experience, knowledge in one particular area lead to me being called upon by lots of people throughout the organisation for assistance... and this was getting in the way of the work I was there to do. It took time and sharing / documenting my knowledge in that field to pass the baton on but this was a good thing for my project, good for me personally, and good for the wider organisation.



          I know it's hard at times feeling "used" by colleagues but oftentimes people go to work to work and get things done and see others around them as resources to getting that work done. It's not personal - they're not being heartless or mean - it's just the way some are.



          And the interpersonal connections will come in time, if you and the other people want that to happen. Be friendly when helping people and it'll naturally follow.






          share|improve this answer






















            up vote
            0
            down vote










            up vote
            0
            down vote









            If you feel the need to avoid sharing your knowledge and experiences with your colleagues - which I think is a shame - then direct them to online resources (articles / tutorials) which would enable you to help them help themselves. If they want direct help then let them know you're busy and might be able to help them later in the day, or later that week.



            I believe there's a lot of value to being someone who people come to for help. If it's having an impact on your workload then of course, speak to your manager about it for advice. He might give you the power to say no to people at busy times. I'd imagine he'd rather you help others than not though.



            In my experience, knowledge in one particular area lead to me being called upon by lots of people throughout the organisation for assistance... and this was getting in the way of the work I was there to do. It took time and sharing / documenting my knowledge in that field to pass the baton on but this was a good thing for my project, good for me personally, and good for the wider organisation.



            I know it's hard at times feeling "used" by colleagues but oftentimes people go to work to work and get things done and see others around them as resources to getting that work done. It's not personal - they're not being heartless or mean - it's just the way some are.



            And the interpersonal connections will come in time, if you and the other people want that to happen. Be friendly when helping people and it'll naturally follow.






            share|improve this answer












            If you feel the need to avoid sharing your knowledge and experiences with your colleagues - which I think is a shame - then direct them to online resources (articles / tutorials) which would enable you to help them help themselves. If they want direct help then let them know you're busy and might be able to help them later in the day, or later that week.



            I believe there's a lot of value to being someone who people come to for help. If it's having an impact on your workload then of course, speak to your manager about it for advice. He might give you the power to say no to people at busy times. I'd imagine he'd rather you help others than not though.



            In my experience, knowledge in one particular area lead to me being called upon by lots of people throughout the organisation for assistance... and this was getting in the way of the work I was there to do. It took time and sharing / documenting my knowledge in that field to pass the baton on but this was a good thing for my project, good for me personally, and good for the wider organisation.



            I know it's hard at times feeling "used" by colleagues but oftentimes people go to work to work and get things done and see others around them as resources to getting that work done. It's not personal - they're not being heartless or mean - it's just the way some are.



            And the interpersonal connections will come in time, if you and the other people want that to happen. Be friendly when helping people and it'll naturally follow.







            share|improve this answer












            share|improve this answer



            share|improve this answer










            answered 29 mins ago









            Matthew E Cornish

            1073




            1073




















                up vote
                0
                down vote













                This remembers me of some classmate that ask to see my homework without anything in return. It was like I busted my ass to do my homework and they get to see the solution for free.



                I suggest taking this last word literally and see this as unpaid work. After all, they are asking you information on a topic you rather not talk about and are taking your time without nothing for you in return.



                So, what I would suggest you do is:



                • Allow them to ask a couple of question. They might just be polite by showing interest.


                • When you feel that they have asked enough question, tell them that:



                I'm sorry but I'm not really interested in talking about this. Can we talk about X/something else instead?




                It's okay to not be interested in speaking about something and suggesting to talk about something show that you are open to speaking with them, just not about your website.



                Alternatively, if they are really interested in building a website, you can propose to them a "private class" where you will act as a teacher in return for some money.






                share|improve this answer
























                  up vote
                  0
                  down vote













                  This remembers me of some classmate that ask to see my homework without anything in return. It was like I busted my ass to do my homework and they get to see the solution for free.



                  I suggest taking this last word literally and see this as unpaid work. After all, they are asking you information on a topic you rather not talk about and are taking your time without nothing for you in return.



                  So, what I would suggest you do is:



                  • Allow them to ask a couple of question. They might just be polite by showing interest.


                  • When you feel that they have asked enough question, tell them that:



                  I'm sorry but I'm not really interested in talking about this. Can we talk about X/something else instead?




                  It's okay to not be interested in speaking about something and suggesting to talk about something show that you are open to speaking with them, just not about your website.



                  Alternatively, if they are really interested in building a website, you can propose to them a "private class" where you will act as a teacher in return for some money.






                  share|improve this answer






















                    up vote
                    0
                    down vote










                    up vote
                    0
                    down vote









                    This remembers me of some classmate that ask to see my homework without anything in return. It was like I busted my ass to do my homework and they get to see the solution for free.



                    I suggest taking this last word literally and see this as unpaid work. After all, they are asking you information on a topic you rather not talk about and are taking your time without nothing for you in return.



                    So, what I would suggest you do is:



                    • Allow them to ask a couple of question. They might just be polite by showing interest.


                    • When you feel that they have asked enough question, tell them that:



                    I'm sorry but I'm not really interested in talking about this. Can we talk about X/something else instead?




                    It's okay to not be interested in speaking about something and suggesting to talk about something show that you are open to speaking with them, just not about your website.



                    Alternatively, if they are really interested in building a website, you can propose to them a "private class" where you will act as a teacher in return for some money.






                    share|improve this answer












                    This remembers me of some classmate that ask to see my homework without anything in return. It was like I busted my ass to do my homework and they get to see the solution for free.



                    I suggest taking this last word literally and see this as unpaid work. After all, they are asking you information on a topic you rather not talk about and are taking your time without nothing for you in return.



                    So, what I would suggest you do is:



                    • Allow them to ask a couple of question. They might just be polite by showing interest.


                    • When you feel that they have asked enough question, tell them that:



                    I'm sorry but I'm not really interested in talking about this. Can we talk about X/something else instead?




                    It's okay to not be interested in speaking about something and suggesting to talk about something show that you are open to speaking with them, just not about your website.



                    Alternatively, if they are really interested in building a website, you can propose to them a "private class" where you will act as a teacher in return for some money.







                    share|improve this answer












                    share|improve this answer



                    share|improve this answer










                    answered 23 mins ago









                    Noon

                    2,0721524




                    2,0721524




















                        up vote
                        0
                        down vote













                        An approach that would work nicely in your situation is to just point them to where you got your research done. For example to the question of "What software did you use to create it?" you can say something like: "Oh there are hundreds of options for that, I read about it on ...... .com. Different options are explained there better than I could explain them to you, you should check it out.".



                        This way you are not totally brushing them off and you are referring people to the sources that helped you which will also help the creators of those sources. If you feel someone is close enough to go into more details.



                        I think this would work as it is giving people a starting point, which is what they need.



                        I have a better answer too but your only interest in me is my expertise on this topic and I have spend a lot of time to get it so I am not telling.






                        share|improve this answer


























                          up vote
                          0
                          down vote













                          An approach that would work nicely in your situation is to just point them to where you got your research done. For example to the question of "What software did you use to create it?" you can say something like: "Oh there are hundreds of options for that, I read about it on ...... .com. Different options are explained there better than I could explain them to you, you should check it out.".



                          This way you are not totally brushing them off and you are referring people to the sources that helped you which will also help the creators of those sources. If you feel someone is close enough to go into more details.



                          I think this would work as it is giving people a starting point, which is what they need.



                          I have a better answer too but your only interest in me is my expertise on this topic and I have spend a lot of time to get it so I am not telling.






                          share|improve this answer
























                            up vote
                            0
                            down vote










                            up vote
                            0
                            down vote









                            An approach that would work nicely in your situation is to just point them to where you got your research done. For example to the question of "What software did you use to create it?" you can say something like: "Oh there are hundreds of options for that, I read about it on ...... .com. Different options are explained there better than I could explain them to you, you should check it out.".



                            This way you are not totally brushing them off and you are referring people to the sources that helped you which will also help the creators of those sources. If you feel someone is close enough to go into more details.



                            I think this would work as it is giving people a starting point, which is what they need.



                            I have a better answer too but your only interest in me is my expertise on this topic and I have spend a lot of time to get it so I am not telling.






                            share|improve this answer














                            An approach that would work nicely in your situation is to just point them to where you got your research done. For example to the question of "What software did you use to create it?" you can say something like: "Oh there are hundreds of options for that, I read about it on ...... .com. Different options are explained there better than I could explain them to you, you should check it out.".



                            This way you are not totally brushing them off and you are referring people to the sources that helped you which will also help the creators of those sources. If you feel someone is close enough to go into more details.



                            I think this would work as it is giving people a starting point, which is what they need.



                            I have a better answer too but your only interest in me is my expertise on this topic and I have spend a lot of time to get it so I am not telling.







                            share|improve this answer














                            share|improve this answer



                            share|improve this answer








                            edited 23 mins ago

























                            answered 29 mins ago









                            Ontamu

                            3,68721132




                            3,68721132



























                                 

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