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How do I have a conversation about stress with my manager when he is the cause?
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This question follows from How to deal with mixed messages during the probation period?
My situation is that my probation period has been extended. Moreover, my manager sends me mixed messages about my performance.
Seeing as my probation period is almost up and I don't have any information as to how that will proceed, then I'm stressed. Moreover, I haven't found a 'back-up' job, but I do have a decent amount of savings.
I know that I'm stressed (as opposed to 'under pressure') because my blood pressure has increased to 'high' levels whilst working here. I don't have any other drivers of high blood pressure (smoking, obesity, high-salt diet etc.)
I want to have a conversation with my manager about the stress he has been causing me and the potential health consequences it may have. Ideally I want to have a situation where going forwards he gives me consistent feedback on my work. Negative feedback is fine; at least I'll know where I stand.
My question is, how can I hold a conversation about workplace stress when I know my manager is the cause?
manager stress conversation
asked 4 hours ago
WorkerWithoutACause
9,21863257
add a comment |Â
up vote
3
down vote
favorite
This question follows from How to deal with mixed messages during the probation period?
My situation is that my probation period has been extended. Moreover, my manager sends me mixed messages about my performance.
Seeing as my probation period is almost up and I don't have any information as to how that will proceed, then I'm stressed. Moreover, I haven't found a 'back-up' job, but I do have a decent amount of savings.
I know that I'm stressed (as opposed to 'under pressure') because my blood pressure has increased to 'high' levels whilst working here. I don't have any other drivers of high blood pressure (smoking, obesity, high-salt diet etc.)
I want to have a conversation with my manager about the stress he has been causing me and the potential health consequences it may have. Ideally I want to have a situation where going forwards he gives me consistent feedback on my work. Negative feedback is fine; at least I'll know where I stand.
My question is, how can I hold a conversation about workplace stress when I know my manager is the cause?
manager stress conversation
asked 4 hours ago
WorkerWithoutACause
9,21863257
If you want feedback, you need to ask for feedback until you get it. For stress, talk to your doctor.
– Joe Strazzere
53 mins ago
"Seeing as my probation period is almost up and I don't have any information as to how that will proceed, then I'm stressed." - if your non-medical assessment of your symptoms is correct, then your stress will going away soon one way or the other.
– Joe Strazzere
49 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
3
down vote
favorite
up vote
3
down vote
favorite
This question follows from How to deal with mixed messages during the probation period?
My situation is that my probation period has been extended. Moreover, my manager sends me mixed messages about my performance.
Seeing as my probation period is almost up and I don't have any information as to how that will proceed, then I'm stressed. Moreover, I haven't found a 'back-up' job, but I do have a decent amount of savings.
I know that I'm stressed (as opposed to 'under pressure') because my blood pressure has increased to 'high' levels whilst working here. I don't have any other drivers of high blood pressure (smoking, obesity, high-salt diet etc.)
I want to have a conversation with my manager about the stress he has been causing me and the potential health consequences it may have. Ideally I want to have a situation where going forwards he gives me consistent feedback on my work. Negative feedback is fine; at least I'll know where I stand.
My question is, how can I hold a conversation about workplace stress when I know my manager is the cause?
manager stress conversation
asked 4 hours ago
WorkerWithoutACause
9,21863257
This question follows from How to deal with mixed messages during the probation period?
My situation is that my probation period has been extended. Moreover, my manager sends me mixed messages about my performance.
Seeing as my probation period is almost up and I don't have any information as to how that will proceed, then I'm stressed. Moreover, I haven't found a 'back-up' job, but I do have a decent amount of savings.
I know that I'm stressed (as opposed to 'under pressure') because my blood pressure has increased to 'high' levels whilst working here. I don't have any other drivers of high blood pressure (smoking, obesity, high-salt diet etc.)
I want to have a conversation with my manager about the stress he has been causing me and the potential health consequences it may have. Ideally I want to have a situation where going forwards he gives me consistent feedback on my work. Negative feedback is fine; at least I'll know where I stand.
My question is, how can I hold a conversation about workplace stress when I know my manager is the cause?
manager stress conversation
manager stress conversation
asked 4 hours ago
WorkerWithoutACause
9,21863257
asked 4 hours ago
WorkerWithoutACause
9,21863257
asked 4 hours ago
WorkerWithoutACause
9,21863257
asked 4 hours ago
WorkerWithoutACause
9,21863257
asked 4 hours ago
WorkerWithoutACause
9,21863257
9,21863257
If you want feedback, you need to ask for feedback until you get it. For stress, talk to your doctor.
– Joe Strazzere
53 mins ago
"Seeing as my probation period is almost up and I don't have any information as to how that will proceed, then I'm stressed." - if your non-medical assessment of your symptoms is correct, then your stress will going away soon one way or the other.
– Joe Strazzere
49 mins ago
add a comment |Â
If you want feedback, you need to ask for feedback until you get it. For stress, talk to your doctor.
– Joe Strazzere
53 mins ago
"Seeing as my probation period is almost up and I don't have any information as to how that will proceed, then I'm stressed." - if your non-medical assessment of your symptoms is correct, then your stress will going away soon one way or the other.
– Joe Strazzere
49 mins ago
If you want feedback, you need to ask for feedback until you get it. For stress, talk to your doctor.
– Joe Strazzere
53 mins ago
If you want feedback, you need to ask for feedback until you get it. For stress, talk to your doctor.
– Joe Strazzere
53 mins ago
"Seeing as my probation period is almost up and I don't have any information as to how that will proceed, then I'm stressed." - if your non-medical assessment of your symptoms is correct, then your stress will going away soon one way or the other.
– Joe Strazzere
49 mins ago
"Seeing as my probation period is almost up and I don't have any information as to how that will proceed, then I'm stressed." - if your non-medical assessment of your symptoms is correct, then your stress will going away soon one way or the other.
– Joe Strazzere
49 mins ago
add a comment |Â
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
up vote
10
down vote
Don't talk to him about the stress that he's causing you.
Do have a talk with him regarding the stress that the situation is causing you.
Tell him what situation is causing you problems and how you'd ideally like to resolve them, or give specifics about what it is that you find difficult to deal with.
I'm finding it hard to do x, y, and z because I also have priorities with a, b, and c.
So, it's the situation that's stressful, let your manager infers what he needs to about the causes for you being pulled in different directions.
answered 4 hours ago
Snow♦
51.7k46170214
1
To address getting mixed messages on your performance, I would add to this answer that that OP should be pushing for clearer expectations too.
– jcmack
4 hours ago
And in addition to this, you should have a department like Human Resources / Personnel wherein someone should be able to listen to your concerns and help / advice you; possibly even mediate for you if need be.
– Matthew E Cornish
4 hours ago
Alleviating stress isn't your manager's job. If you are having trouble getting work done, talk to your manager about that.
– Joe Strazzere
52 mins ago
add a comment |Â
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
up vote
10
down vote
Don't talk to him about the stress that he's causing you.
Do have a talk with him regarding the stress that the situation is causing you.
Tell him what situation is causing you problems and how you'd ideally like to resolve them, or give specifics about what it is that you find difficult to deal with.
I'm finding it hard to do x, y, and z because I also have priorities with a, b, and c.
So, it's the situation that's stressful, let your manager infers what he needs to about the causes for you being pulled in different directions.
answered 4 hours ago
Snow♦
51.7k46170214
1
To address getting mixed messages on your performance, I would add to this answer that that OP should be pushing for clearer expectations too.
– jcmack
4 hours ago
And in addition to this, you should have a department like Human Resources / Personnel wherein someone should be able to listen to your concerns and help / advice you; possibly even mediate for you if need be.
– Matthew E Cornish
4 hours ago
Alleviating stress isn't your manager's job. If you are having trouble getting work done, talk to your manager about that.
– Joe Strazzere
52 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
10
down vote
Don't talk to him about the stress that he's causing you.
Do have a talk with him regarding the stress that the situation is causing you.
Tell him what situation is causing you problems and how you'd ideally like to resolve them, or give specifics about what it is that you find difficult to deal with.
I'm finding it hard to do x, y, and z because I also have priorities with a, b, and c.
So, it's the situation that's stressful, let your manager infers what he needs to about the causes for you being pulled in different directions.
answered 4 hours ago
Snow♦
51.7k46170214
1
To address getting mixed messages on your performance, I would add to this answer that that OP should be pushing for clearer expectations too.
– jcmack
4 hours ago
And in addition to this, you should have a department like Human Resources / Personnel wherein someone should be able to listen to your concerns and help / advice you; possibly even mediate for you if need be.
– Matthew E Cornish
4 hours ago
Alleviating stress isn't your manager's job. If you are having trouble getting work done, talk to your manager about that.
– Joe Strazzere
52 mins ago
add a comment |Â
up vote
10
down vote
up vote
10
down vote
Don't talk to him about the stress that he's causing you.
Do have a talk with him regarding the stress that the situation is causing you.
Tell him what situation is causing you problems and how you'd ideally like to resolve them, or give specifics about what it is that you find difficult to deal with.
I'm finding it hard to do x, y, and z because I also have priorities with a, b, and c.
So, it's the situation that's stressful, let your manager infers what he needs to about the causes for you being pulled in different directions.
answered 4 hours ago
Snow♦
51.7k46170214
Don't talk to him about the stress that he's causing you.
Do have a talk with him regarding the stress that the situation is causing you.
Tell him what situation is causing you problems and how you'd ideally like to resolve them, or give specifics about what it is that you find difficult to deal with.
I'm finding it hard to do x, y, and z because I also have priorities with a, b, and c.
So, it's the situation that's stressful, let your manager infers what he needs to about the causes for you being pulled in different directions.
answered 4 hours ago
Snow♦
51.7k46170214
answered 4 hours ago
Snow♦
51.7k46170214
answered 4 hours ago
Snow♦
51.7k46170214
answered 4 hours ago
Snow♦
51.7k46170214
51.7k46170214
1
To address getting mixed messages on your performance, I would add to this answer that that OP should be pushing for clearer expectations too.
– jcmack
4 hours ago
And in addition to this, you should have a department like Human Resources / Personnel wherein someone should be able to listen to your concerns and help / advice you; possibly even mediate for you if need be.
– Matthew E Cornish
4 hours ago
Alleviating stress isn't your manager's job. If you are having trouble getting work done, talk to your manager about that.
– Joe Strazzere
52 mins ago
add a comment |Â
1
To address getting mixed messages on your performance, I would add to this answer that that OP should be pushing for clearer expectations too.
– jcmack
4 hours ago
And in addition to this, you should have a department like Human Resources / Personnel wherein someone should be able to listen to your concerns and help / advice you; possibly even mediate for you if need be.
– Matthew E Cornish
4 hours ago
Alleviating stress isn't your manager's job. If you are having trouble getting work done, talk to your manager about that.
– Joe Strazzere
52 mins ago
1
1
To address getting mixed messages on your performance, I would add to this answer that that OP should be pushing for clearer expectations too.
– jcmack
4 hours ago
To address getting mixed messages on your performance, I would add to this answer that that OP should be pushing for clearer expectations too.
– jcmack
4 hours ago
And in addition to this, you should have a department like Human Resources / Personnel wherein someone should be able to listen to your concerns and help / advice you; possibly even mediate for you if need be.
– Matthew E Cornish
4 hours ago
And in addition to this, you should have a department like Human Resources / Personnel wherein someone should be able to listen to your concerns and help / advice you; possibly even mediate for you if need be.
– Matthew E Cornish
4 hours ago
Alleviating stress isn't your manager's job. If you are having trouble getting work done, talk to your manager about that.
– Joe Strazzere
52 mins ago
Alleviating stress isn't your manager's job. If you are having trouble getting work done, talk to your manager about that.
– Joe Strazzere
52 mins ago
add a comment |Â
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If you want feedback, you need to ask for feedback until you get it. For stress, talk to your doctor.
– Joe Strazzere
53 mins ago
"Seeing as my probation period is almost up and I don't have any information as to how that will proceed, then I'm stressed." - if your non-medical assessment of your symptoms is correct, then your stress will going away soon one way or the other.
– Joe Strazzere
49 mins ago