What do I say if my manager asks me if there is someone in the company I would rather not work with?

The name of the pictureThe name of the pictureThe name of the pictureClash Royale CLAN TAG#URR8PPP





.everyoneloves__top-leaderboard:empty,.everyoneloves__mid-leaderboard:empty margin-bottom:0;







up vote
31
down vote

favorite
4












As I was meeting with my manager the other day, he asked me who in the department I looked up to, besides my mentor. I named several people. Then he asked me if there was anyone in the company I would rather not work with, or that I would be happy if they just left.



Now admittedly I don't enjoy working with all my coworkers equally, but under that kind of pressure I honestly couldn't think of anyone I wanted to call out. So instead I told him that one person I really did not like working with had already left, which was true. He still seemed to want to know about someone who was still working at the company, though.



I'm wondering if it is related to performance evaluations coming up. I wanted to be honest, but I also was hesitant to throw anyone under the bus even though some of my coworkers are less deserving than others. I was also afraid that by criticizing others I could make myself look bad. I have a good relationship with my manager and am confident it was not a trap, but it felt that way.



How can I answer a question like that truthfully but politely (and ethically!), and with a minimum of damage to other coworkers' careers?







share|improve this question


















  • 23




    IMHO you answered it well, and you should stay the course.
    – MrFox
    Apr 9 '14 at 17:02






  • 1




    Tell it like it is - believe it or not, some managers actually appreciate honesty.
    – user17354
    Apr 10 '14 at 16:14










  • You can smile and say, "I love everyone equally!" and then wink. He'll get the message.
    – Ege Ersoz
    Aug 25 '14 at 21:02
















up vote
31
down vote

favorite
4












As I was meeting with my manager the other day, he asked me who in the department I looked up to, besides my mentor. I named several people. Then he asked me if there was anyone in the company I would rather not work with, or that I would be happy if they just left.



Now admittedly I don't enjoy working with all my coworkers equally, but under that kind of pressure I honestly couldn't think of anyone I wanted to call out. So instead I told him that one person I really did not like working with had already left, which was true. He still seemed to want to know about someone who was still working at the company, though.



I'm wondering if it is related to performance evaluations coming up. I wanted to be honest, but I also was hesitant to throw anyone under the bus even though some of my coworkers are less deserving than others. I was also afraid that by criticizing others I could make myself look bad. I have a good relationship with my manager and am confident it was not a trap, but it felt that way.



How can I answer a question like that truthfully but politely (and ethically!), and with a minimum of damage to other coworkers' careers?







share|improve this question


















  • 23




    IMHO you answered it well, and you should stay the course.
    – MrFox
    Apr 9 '14 at 17:02






  • 1




    Tell it like it is - believe it or not, some managers actually appreciate honesty.
    – user17354
    Apr 10 '14 at 16:14










  • You can smile and say, "I love everyone equally!" and then wink. He'll get the message.
    – Ege Ersoz
    Aug 25 '14 at 21:02












up vote
31
down vote

favorite
4









up vote
31
down vote

favorite
4






4





As I was meeting with my manager the other day, he asked me who in the department I looked up to, besides my mentor. I named several people. Then he asked me if there was anyone in the company I would rather not work with, or that I would be happy if they just left.



Now admittedly I don't enjoy working with all my coworkers equally, but under that kind of pressure I honestly couldn't think of anyone I wanted to call out. So instead I told him that one person I really did not like working with had already left, which was true. He still seemed to want to know about someone who was still working at the company, though.



I'm wondering if it is related to performance evaluations coming up. I wanted to be honest, but I also was hesitant to throw anyone under the bus even though some of my coworkers are less deserving than others. I was also afraid that by criticizing others I could make myself look bad. I have a good relationship with my manager and am confident it was not a trap, but it felt that way.



How can I answer a question like that truthfully but politely (and ethically!), and with a minimum of damage to other coworkers' careers?







share|improve this question














As I was meeting with my manager the other day, he asked me who in the department I looked up to, besides my mentor. I named several people. Then he asked me if there was anyone in the company I would rather not work with, or that I would be happy if they just left.



Now admittedly I don't enjoy working with all my coworkers equally, but under that kind of pressure I honestly couldn't think of anyone I wanted to call out. So instead I told him that one person I really did not like working with had already left, which was true. He still seemed to want to know about someone who was still working at the company, though.



I'm wondering if it is related to performance evaluations coming up. I wanted to be honest, but I also was hesitant to throw anyone under the bus even though some of my coworkers are less deserving than others. I was also afraid that by criticizing others I could make myself look bad. I have a good relationship with my manager and am confident it was not a trap, but it felt that way.



How can I answer a question like that truthfully but politely (and ethically!), and with a minimum of damage to other coworkers' careers?









share|improve this question













share|improve this question




share|improve this question








edited Dec 20 '14 at 0:25









starsplusplus

1,2741220




1,2741220










asked Apr 9 '14 at 16:50









Kazark

405716




405716







  • 23




    IMHO you answered it well, and you should stay the course.
    – MrFox
    Apr 9 '14 at 17:02






  • 1




    Tell it like it is - believe it or not, some managers actually appreciate honesty.
    – user17354
    Apr 10 '14 at 16:14










  • You can smile and say, "I love everyone equally!" and then wink. He'll get the message.
    – Ege Ersoz
    Aug 25 '14 at 21:02












  • 23




    IMHO you answered it well, and you should stay the course.
    – MrFox
    Apr 9 '14 at 17:02






  • 1




    Tell it like it is - believe it or not, some managers actually appreciate honesty.
    – user17354
    Apr 10 '14 at 16:14










  • You can smile and say, "I love everyone equally!" and then wink. He'll get the message.
    – Ege Ersoz
    Aug 25 '14 at 21:02







23




23




IMHO you answered it well, and you should stay the course.
– MrFox
Apr 9 '14 at 17:02




IMHO you answered it well, and you should stay the course.
– MrFox
Apr 9 '14 at 17:02




1




1




Tell it like it is - believe it or not, some managers actually appreciate honesty.
– user17354
Apr 10 '14 at 16:14




Tell it like it is - believe it or not, some managers actually appreciate honesty.
– user17354
Apr 10 '14 at 16:14












You can smile and say, "I love everyone equally!" and then wink. He'll get the message.
– Ege Ersoz
Aug 25 '14 at 21:02




You can smile and say, "I love everyone equally!" and then wink. He'll get the message.
– Ege Ersoz
Aug 25 '14 at 21:02










4 Answers
4






active

oldest

votes

















up vote
42
down vote



accepted










You can make it about you, plural or the interaction more than about the other person. You can also soften it by saying something positive about the other person. Some (approximate) examples of things I have either said (as an employee) or heard (as a manager) include:



  • "Alice and I seem to have very different styles of interactions; I find her pushy while she finds me too reticent. She works great with Bob and I work great with Carol, so it's not a problem with either of us on our own -- but something about the two of us makes for frustrating interactions."


  • "I like David but for some reason he doesn't seem to like me much. I don't know what that's about, but all else being equal, it might be better for us not to work closely so he doesn't get aggravated."


  • "Ellen is an early-morning person and I prefer to get routine tasks out of the way first so I can focus on harder work in the afternoons. One of us could change our routine if we were working together, of course." (Implied: "...but we don't want to".)


  • "Fred is smart and I sure could learn a lot from him, but I have a lot of trouble understanding his accent and I can tell he's self-conscious about it, so pair-programming doesn't work as well as stuff that can be done via email/wiki/IM/etc."






share|improve this answer




















  • Monica, thank you for this. I wish I could have read it before I was asked that question. That would have turned it from an awkward situation into an opportunity to get my two-cents in for the next time teams are reformed. Is this sort of question from a manager not uncommon, then?
    – Kazark
    Apr 9 '14 at 17:07






  • 5




    I've never been asked (nor asked) that question directly. Asking for constructive feedback from peers as part of performance reviews is pretty common in my experience, but there it's not so much "who would you rather not work with" as "what is Gina doing well and what could she be doing better?".
    – Monica Cellio♦
    Apr 9 '14 at 17:10






  • 3




    I think this sort of question from a manager is very uncommon. (I'm 40, worked in software the whole time, from startups to 300-developer projects.) Yes, ask outright for an evaluation of particular people, but not asking as described.
    – Jonathan Hartley
    Apr 10 '14 at 7:58


















up vote
29
down vote













It's fair to ask "why are you asking?"



Performance reviews may be a reason, or they may be replanning who is on what team, or trying to figure out a team leader for a new project. There's plenty of reasons to ask - he may even be touching base. But particularly when there's an attempt to probe for a final answer, you're fair to say "with respect to what, exactly?"



It's also fair to say the truth - you don't like speaking ill of others when the issues between you are (I assume) somewhat minor. If you had such a problem with a coworker that you couldn't do your work, you'd be be bringing the problem up in meetings with your boss -- so the problems can't be that bad. It's also fair to say that where everyone is a mixed blessing (being human and all), that you'd love some better insight than just "people who you are least compatible with" - for example, I have some great colleagues who I'd never want to work for. And I have some colleagues who are great team players, but very bad at certain elements of the work, while great at others. So I'd pick them for one task and make sure that they had serious mentoring for another.



From there, I really love Monica's insights on how to relay interaction issues - focus on the issue, not the person. And short and sweet.






share|improve this answer



























    up vote
    2
    down vote













    To me this sounds like there may be an upcoming organization change and he wants to place you best, OR there is a pending reduction in force. I suspect the latter is more likely.



    Your manager is fishing for feedback to support his decision, which he has probably already made.



    This is a rather unfair position to put people in, but one that is rather common. As a senior developer I have frequently been asked by my manager to evaluate other members of my team. Honesty is best, also asking your manager frankly as to why he is asking the question may help you answer fairly.






    share|improve this answer



























      up vote
      1
      down vote













      I think it’s fine to say that there isn’t anyone at the company you’d rather not work with, if that’s true.



      You might be really happy with all of your colleagues, or at least happy enough that you wouldn’t want any of them to lose their job just to make you slightly happier.



      I wouldn’t be afraid to say that just because your manager prompted you again after you said there wasn’t anyone. The manager may well be aware that speaking ill of co-workers feels awkward to you, and may have just been trying to make you feel like you didn’t have to hold back out of politeness.






      share|improve this answer




















        Your Answer







        StackExchange.ready(function()
        var channelOptions =
        tags: "".split(" "),
        id: "423"
        ;
        initTagRenderer("".split(" "), "".split(" "), channelOptions);

        StackExchange.using("externalEditor", function()
        // Have to fire editor after snippets, if snippets enabled
        if (StackExchange.settings.snippets.snippetsEnabled)
        StackExchange.using("snippets", function()
        createEditor();
        );

        else
        createEditor();

        );

        function createEditor()
        StackExchange.prepareEditor(
        heartbeatType: 'answer',
        convertImagesToLinks: false,
        noModals: false,
        showLowRepImageUploadWarning: true,
        reputationToPostImages: null,
        bindNavPrevention: true,
        postfix: "",
        noCode: true, onDemand: false,
        discardSelector: ".discard-answer"
        ,immediatelyShowMarkdownHelp:true
        );



        );








         

        draft saved


        draft discarded


















        StackExchange.ready(
        function ()
        StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fworkplace.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f22450%2fwhat-do-i-say-if-my-manager-asks-me-if-there-is-someone-in-the-company-i-would-r%23new-answer', 'question_page');

        );

        Post as a guest

























        StackExchange.ready(function ()
        $("#show-editor-button input, #show-editor-button button").click(function ()
        var showEditor = function()
        $("#show-editor-button").hide();
        $("#post-form").removeClass("dno");
        StackExchange.editor.finallyInit();
        ;

        var useFancy = $(this).data('confirm-use-fancy');
        if(useFancy == 'True')
        var popupTitle = $(this).data('confirm-fancy-title');
        var popupBody = $(this).data('confirm-fancy-body');
        var popupAccept = $(this).data('confirm-fancy-accept-button');

        $(this).loadPopup(
        url: '/post/self-answer-popup',
        loaded: function(popup)
        var pTitle = $(popup).find('h2');
        var pBody = $(popup).find('.popup-body');
        var pSubmit = $(popup).find('.popup-submit');

        pTitle.text(popupTitle);
        pBody.html(popupBody);
        pSubmit.val(popupAccept).click(showEditor);

        )
        else
        var confirmText = $(this).data('confirm-text');
        if (confirmText ? confirm(confirmText) : true)
        showEditor();


        );
        );






        4 Answers
        4






        active

        oldest

        votes








        4 Answers
        4






        active

        oldest

        votes









        active

        oldest

        votes






        active

        oldest

        votes








        up vote
        42
        down vote



        accepted










        You can make it about you, plural or the interaction more than about the other person. You can also soften it by saying something positive about the other person. Some (approximate) examples of things I have either said (as an employee) or heard (as a manager) include:



        • "Alice and I seem to have very different styles of interactions; I find her pushy while she finds me too reticent. She works great with Bob and I work great with Carol, so it's not a problem with either of us on our own -- but something about the two of us makes for frustrating interactions."


        • "I like David but for some reason he doesn't seem to like me much. I don't know what that's about, but all else being equal, it might be better for us not to work closely so he doesn't get aggravated."


        • "Ellen is an early-morning person and I prefer to get routine tasks out of the way first so I can focus on harder work in the afternoons. One of us could change our routine if we were working together, of course." (Implied: "...but we don't want to".)


        • "Fred is smart and I sure could learn a lot from him, but I have a lot of trouble understanding his accent and I can tell he's self-conscious about it, so pair-programming doesn't work as well as stuff that can be done via email/wiki/IM/etc."






        share|improve this answer




















        • Monica, thank you for this. I wish I could have read it before I was asked that question. That would have turned it from an awkward situation into an opportunity to get my two-cents in for the next time teams are reformed. Is this sort of question from a manager not uncommon, then?
          – Kazark
          Apr 9 '14 at 17:07






        • 5




          I've never been asked (nor asked) that question directly. Asking for constructive feedback from peers as part of performance reviews is pretty common in my experience, but there it's not so much "who would you rather not work with" as "what is Gina doing well and what could she be doing better?".
          – Monica Cellio♦
          Apr 9 '14 at 17:10






        • 3




          I think this sort of question from a manager is very uncommon. (I'm 40, worked in software the whole time, from startups to 300-developer projects.) Yes, ask outright for an evaluation of particular people, but not asking as described.
          – Jonathan Hartley
          Apr 10 '14 at 7:58















        up vote
        42
        down vote



        accepted










        You can make it about you, plural or the interaction more than about the other person. You can also soften it by saying something positive about the other person. Some (approximate) examples of things I have either said (as an employee) or heard (as a manager) include:



        • "Alice and I seem to have very different styles of interactions; I find her pushy while she finds me too reticent. She works great with Bob and I work great with Carol, so it's not a problem with either of us on our own -- but something about the two of us makes for frustrating interactions."


        • "I like David but for some reason he doesn't seem to like me much. I don't know what that's about, but all else being equal, it might be better for us not to work closely so he doesn't get aggravated."


        • "Ellen is an early-morning person and I prefer to get routine tasks out of the way first so I can focus on harder work in the afternoons. One of us could change our routine if we were working together, of course." (Implied: "...but we don't want to".)


        • "Fred is smart and I sure could learn a lot from him, but I have a lot of trouble understanding his accent and I can tell he's self-conscious about it, so pair-programming doesn't work as well as stuff that can be done via email/wiki/IM/etc."






        share|improve this answer




















        • Monica, thank you for this. I wish I could have read it before I was asked that question. That would have turned it from an awkward situation into an opportunity to get my two-cents in for the next time teams are reformed. Is this sort of question from a manager not uncommon, then?
          – Kazark
          Apr 9 '14 at 17:07






        • 5




          I've never been asked (nor asked) that question directly. Asking for constructive feedback from peers as part of performance reviews is pretty common in my experience, but there it's not so much "who would you rather not work with" as "what is Gina doing well and what could she be doing better?".
          – Monica Cellio♦
          Apr 9 '14 at 17:10






        • 3




          I think this sort of question from a manager is very uncommon. (I'm 40, worked in software the whole time, from startups to 300-developer projects.) Yes, ask outright for an evaluation of particular people, but not asking as described.
          – Jonathan Hartley
          Apr 10 '14 at 7:58













        up vote
        42
        down vote



        accepted







        up vote
        42
        down vote



        accepted






        You can make it about you, plural or the interaction more than about the other person. You can also soften it by saying something positive about the other person. Some (approximate) examples of things I have either said (as an employee) or heard (as a manager) include:



        • "Alice and I seem to have very different styles of interactions; I find her pushy while she finds me too reticent. She works great with Bob and I work great with Carol, so it's not a problem with either of us on our own -- but something about the two of us makes for frustrating interactions."


        • "I like David but for some reason he doesn't seem to like me much. I don't know what that's about, but all else being equal, it might be better for us not to work closely so he doesn't get aggravated."


        • "Ellen is an early-morning person and I prefer to get routine tasks out of the way first so I can focus on harder work in the afternoons. One of us could change our routine if we were working together, of course." (Implied: "...but we don't want to".)


        • "Fred is smart and I sure could learn a lot from him, but I have a lot of trouble understanding his accent and I can tell he's self-conscious about it, so pair-programming doesn't work as well as stuff that can be done via email/wiki/IM/etc."






        share|improve this answer












        You can make it about you, plural or the interaction more than about the other person. You can also soften it by saying something positive about the other person. Some (approximate) examples of things I have either said (as an employee) or heard (as a manager) include:



        • "Alice and I seem to have very different styles of interactions; I find her pushy while she finds me too reticent. She works great with Bob and I work great with Carol, so it's not a problem with either of us on our own -- but something about the two of us makes for frustrating interactions."


        • "I like David but for some reason he doesn't seem to like me much. I don't know what that's about, but all else being equal, it might be better for us not to work closely so he doesn't get aggravated."


        • "Ellen is an early-morning person and I prefer to get routine tasks out of the way first so I can focus on harder work in the afternoons. One of us could change our routine if we were working together, of course." (Implied: "...but we don't want to".)


        • "Fred is smart and I sure could learn a lot from him, but I have a lot of trouble understanding his accent and I can tell he's self-conscious about it, so pair-programming doesn't work as well as stuff that can be done via email/wiki/IM/etc."







        share|improve this answer












        share|improve this answer



        share|improve this answer










        answered Apr 9 '14 at 17:03









        Monica Cellio♦

        43.7k17114191




        43.7k17114191











        • Monica, thank you for this. I wish I could have read it before I was asked that question. That would have turned it from an awkward situation into an opportunity to get my two-cents in for the next time teams are reformed. Is this sort of question from a manager not uncommon, then?
          – Kazark
          Apr 9 '14 at 17:07






        • 5




          I've never been asked (nor asked) that question directly. Asking for constructive feedback from peers as part of performance reviews is pretty common in my experience, but there it's not so much "who would you rather not work with" as "what is Gina doing well and what could she be doing better?".
          – Monica Cellio♦
          Apr 9 '14 at 17:10






        • 3




          I think this sort of question from a manager is very uncommon. (I'm 40, worked in software the whole time, from startups to 300-developer projects.) Yes, ask outright for an evaluation of particular people, but not asking as described.
          – Jonathan Hartley
          Apr 10 '14 at 7:58

















        • Monica, thank you for this. I wish I could have read it before I was asked that question. That would have turned it from an awkward situation into an opportunity to get my two-cents in for the next time teams are reformed. Is this sort of question from a manager not uncommon, then?
          – Kazark
          Apr 9 '14 at 17:07






        • 5




          I've never been asked (nor asked) that question directly. Asking for constructive feedback from peers as part of performance reviews is pretty common in my experience, but there it's not so much "who would you rather not work with" as "what is Gina doing well and what could she be doing better?".
          – Monica Cellio♦
          Apr 9 '14 at 17:10






        • 3




          I think this sort of question from a manager is very uncommon. (I'm 40, worked in software the whole time, from startups to 300-developer projects.) Yes, ask outright for an evaluation of particular people, but not asking as described.
          – Jonathan Hartley
          Apr 10 '14 at 7:58
















        Monica, thank you for this. I wish I could have read it before I was asked that question. That would have turned it from an awkward situation into an opportunity to get my two-cents in for the next time teams are reformed. Is this sort of question from a manager not uncommon, then?
        – Kazark
        Apr 9 '14 at 17:07




        Monica, thank you for this. I wish I could have read it before I was asked that question. That would have turned it from an awkward situation into an opportunity to get my two-cents in for the next time teams are reformed. Is this sort of question from a manager not uncommon, then?
        – Kazark
        Apr 9 '14 at 17:07




        5




        5




        I've never been asked (nor asked) that question directly. Asking for constructive feedback from peers as part of performance reviews is pretty common in my experience, but there it's not so much "who would you rather not work with" as "what is Gina doing well and what could she be doing better?".
        – Monica Cellio♦
        Apr 9 '14 at 17:10




        I've never been asked (nor asked) that question directly. Asking for constructive feedback from peers as part of performance reviews is pretty common in my experience, but there it's not so much "who would you rather not work with" as "what is Gina doing well and what could she be doing better?".
        – Monica Cellio♦
        Apr 9 '14 at 17:10




        3




        3




        I think this sort of question from a manager is very uncommon. (I'm 40, worked in software the whole time, from startups to 300-developer projects.) Yes, ask outright for an evaluation of particular people, but not asking as described.
        – Jonathan Hartley
        Apr 10 '14 at 7:58





        I think this sort of question from a manager is very uncommon. (I'm 40, worked in software the whole time, from startups to 300-developer projects.) Yes, ask outright for an evaluation of particular people, but not asking as described.
        – Jonathan Hartley
        Apr 10 '14 at 7:58













        up vote
        29
        down vote













        It's fair to ask "why are you asking?"



        Performance reviews may be a reason, or they may be replanning who is on what team, or trying to figure out a team leader for a new project. There's plenty of reasons to ask - he may even be touching base. But particularly when there's an attempt to probe for a final answer, you're fair to say "with respect to what, exactly?"



        It's also fair to say the truth - you don't like speaking ill of others when the issues between you are (I assume) somewhat minor. If you had such a problem with a coworker that you couldn't do your work, you'd be be bringing the problem up in meetings with your boss -- so the problems can't be that bad. It's also fair to say that where everyone is a mixed blessing (being human and all), that you'd love some better insight than just "people who you are least compatible with" - for example, I have some great colleagues who I'd never want to work for. And I have some colleagues who are great team players, but very bad at certain elements of the work, while great at others. So I'd pick them for one task and make sure that they had serious mentoring for another.



        From there, I really love Monica's insights on how to relay interaction issues - focus on the issue, not the person. And short and sweet.






        share|improve this answer
























          up vote
          29
          down vote













          It's fair to ask "why are you asking?"



          Performance reviews may be a reason, or they may be replanning who is on what team, or trying to figure out a team leader for a new project. There's plenty of reasons to ask - he may even be touching base. But particularly when there's an attempt to probe for a final answer, you're fair to say "with respect to what, exactly?"



          It's also fair to say the truth - you don't like speaking ill of others when the issues between you are (I assume) somewhat minor. If you had such a problem with a coworker that you couldn't do your work, you'd be be bringing the problem up in meetings with your boss -- so the problems can't be that bad. It's also fair to say that where everyone is a mixed blessing (being human and all), that you'd love some better insight than just "people who you are least compatible with" - for example, I have some great colleagues who I'd never want to work for. And I have some colleagues who are great team players, but very bad at certain elements of the work, while great at others. So I'd pick them for one task and make sure that they had serious mentoring for another.



          From there, I really love Monica's insights on how to relay interaction issues - focus on the issue, not the person. And short and sweet.






          share|improve this answer






















            up vote
            29
            down vote










            up vote
            29
            down vote









            It's fair to ask "why are you asking?"



            Performance reviews may be a reason, or they may be replanning who is on what team, or trying to figure out a team leader for a new project. There's plenty of reasons to ask - he may even be touching base. But particularly when there's an attempt to probe for a final answer, you're fair to say "with respect to what, exactly?"



            It's also fair to say the truth - you don't like speaking ill of others when the issues between you are (I assume) somewhat minor. If you had such a problem with a coworker that you couldn't do your work, you'd be be bringing the problem up in meetings with your boss -- so the problems can't be that bad. It's also fair to say that where everyone is a mixed blessing (being human and all), that you'd love some better insight than just "people who you are least compatible with" - for example, I have some great colleagues who I'd never want to work for. And I have some colleagues who are great team players, but very bad at certain elements of the work, while great at others. So I'd pick them for one task and make sure that they had serious mentoring for another.



            From there, I really love Monica's insights on how to relay interaction issues - focus on the issue, not the person. And short and sweet.






            share|improve this answer












            It's fair to ask "why are you asking?"



            Performance reviews may be a reason, or they may be replanning who is on what team, or trying to figure out a team leader for a new project. There's plenty of reasons to ask - he may even be touching base. But particularly when there's an attempt to probe for a final answer, you're fair to say "with respect to what, exactly?"



            It's also fair to say the truth - you don't like speaking ill of others when the issues between you are (I assume) somewhat minor. If you had such a problem with a coworker that you couldn't do your work, you'd be be bringing the problem up in meetings with your boss -- so the problems can't be that bad. It's also fair to say that where everyone is a mixed blessing (being human and all), that you'd love some better insight than just "people who you are least compatible with" - for example, I have some great colleagues who I'd never want to work for. And I have some colleagues who are great team players, but very bad at certain elements of the work, while great at others. So I'd pick them for one task and make sure that they had serious mentoring for another.



            From there, I really love Monica's insights on how to relay interaction issues - focus on the issue, not the person. And short and sweet.







            share|improve this answer












            share|improve this answer



            share|improve this answer










            answered Apr 9 '14 at 18:01









            bethlakshmi

            70.3k4136277




            70.3k4136277




















                up vote
                2
                down vote













                To me this sounds like there may be an upcoming organization change and he wants to place you best, OR there is a pending reduction in force. I suspect the latter is more likely.



                Your manager is fishing for feedback to support his decision, which he has probably already made.



                This is a rather unfair position to put people in, but one that is rather common. As a senior developer I have frequently been asked by my manager to evaluate other members of my team. Honesty is best, also asking your manager frankly as to why he is asking the question may help you answer fairly.






                share|improve this answer
























                  up vote
                  2
                  down vote













                  To me this sounds like there may be an upcoming organization change and he wants to place you best, OR there is a pending reduction in force. I suspect the latter is more likely.



                  Your manager is fishing for feedback to support his decision, which he has probably already made.



                  This is a rather unfair position to put people in, but one that is rather common. As a senior developer I have frequently been asked by my manager to evaluate other members of my team. Honesty is best, also asking your manager frankly as to why he is asking the question may help you answer fairly.






                  share|improve this answer






















                    up vote
                    2
                    down vote










                    up vote
                    2
                    down vote









                    To me this sounds like there may be an upcoming organization change and he wants to place you best, OR there is a pending reduction in force. I suspect the latter is more likely.



                    Your manager is fishing for feedback to support his decision, which he has probably already made.



                    This is a rather unfair position to put people in, but one that is rather common. As a senior developer I have frequently been asked by my manager to evaluate other members of my team. Honesty is best, also asking your manager frankly as to why he is asking the question may help you answer fairly.






                    share|improve this answer












                    To me this sounds like there may be an upcoming organization change and he wants to place you best, OR there is a pending reduction in force. I suspect the latter is more likely.



                    Your manager is fishing for feedback to support his decision, which he has probably already made.



                    This is a rather unfair position to put people in, but one that is rather common. As a senior developer I have frequently been asked by my manager to evaluate other members of my team. Honesty is best, also asking your manager frankly as to why he is asking the question may help you answer fairly.







                    share|improve this answer












                    share|improve this answer



                    share|improve this answer










                    answered Apr 9 '14 at 20:37









                    Bill Leeper

                    10.7k2735




                    10.7k2735




















                        up vote
                        1
                        down vote













                        I think it’s fine to say that there isn’t anyone at the company you’d rather not work with, if that’s true.



                        You might be really happy with all of your colleagues, or at least happy enough that you wouldn’t want any of them to lose their job just to make you slightly happier.



                        I wouldn’t be afraid to say that just because your manager prompted you again after you said there wasn’t anyone. The manager may well be aware that speaking ill of co-workers feels awkward to you, and may have just been trying to make you feel like you didn’t have to hold back out of politeness.






                        share|improve this answer
























                          up vote
                          1
                          down vote













                          I think it’s fine to say that there isn’t anyone at the company you’d rather not work with, if that’s true.



                          You might be really happy with all of your colleagues, or at least happy enough that you wouldn’t want any of them to lose their job just to make you slightly happier.



                          I wouldn’t be afraid to say that just because your manager prompted you again after you said there wasn’t anyone. The manager may well be aware that speaking ill of co-workers feels awkward to you, and may have just been trying to make you feel like you didn’t have to hold back out of politeness.






                          share|improve this answer






















                            up vote
                            1
                            down vote










                            up vote
                            1
                            down vote









                            I think it’s fine to say that there isn’t anyone at the company you’d rather not work with, if that’s true.



                            You might be really happy with all of your colleagues, or at least happy enough that you wouldn’t want any of them to lose their job just to make you slightly happier.



                            I wouldn’t be afraid to say that just because your manager prompted you again after you said there wasn’t anyone. The manager may well be aware that speaking ill of co-workers feels awkward to you, and may have just been trying to make you feel like you didn’t have to hold back out of politeness.






                            share|improve this answer












                            I think it’s fine to say that there isn’t anyone at the company you’d rather not work with, if that’s true.



                            You might be really happy with all of your colleagues, or at least happy enough that you wouldn’t want any of them to lose their job just to make you slightly happier.



                            I wouldn’t be afraid to say that just because your manager prompted you again after you said there wasn’t anyone. The manager may well be aware that speaking ill of co-workers feels awkward to you, and may have just been trying to make you feel like you didn’t have to hold back out of politeness.







                            share|improve this answer












                            share|improve this answer



                            share|improve this answer










                            answered Apr 10 '14 at 9:19









                            Paul D. Waite

                            417410




                            417410






















                                 

                                draft saved


                                draft discarded


























                                 


                                draft saved


                                draft discarded














                                StackExchange.ready(
                                function ()
                                StackExchange.openid.initPostLogin('.new-post-login', 'https%3a%2f%2fworkplace.stackexchange.com%2fquestions%2f22450%2fwhat-do-i-say-if-my-manager-asks-me-if-there-is-someone-in-the-company-i-would-r%23new-answer', 'question_page');

                                );

                                Post as a guest

















































































                                Comments

                                Popular posts from this blog

                                What does second last employer means? [closed]

                                List of Gilmore Girls characters

                                Confectionery