How to work with a picky project manager?

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I have a sense that my project manager is very picky with me. She speak bluntly. Her words made me uncomfortable sometimes. Once she reported a list of mistakes including very detailed ones I did to the director and I have heard of that from others. I still try to be nice to her and do whatever I can to meet her requirement. She kept being very demanding on me. I am wondering what I can do to improve this work relationship with her.







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  • 2




    Project managers are supposed to be tough on you. What you do is pick up your performance so she has nothing to complain about you.
    – HLGEM
    Sep 1 '16 at 17:27






  • 4




    Have clear deliverables, and deliver on them. Communicate issues clearly and immediately.
    – Jon Custer
    Sep 1 '16 at 17:29










  • Is she also your manager, or do you have a separate manager?
    – thursdaysgeek
    Sep 2 '16 at 0:54






  • 1




    Does she treat other people the same way?
    – thursdaysgeek
    Sep 2 '16 at 0:55
















up vote
0
down vote

favorite












I have a sense that my project manager is very picky with me. She speak bluntly. Her words made me uncomfortable sometimes. Once she reported a list of mistakes including very detailed ones I did to the director and I have heard of that from others. I still try to be nice to her and do whatever I can to meet her requirement. She kept being very demanding on me. I am wondering what I can do to improve this work relationship with her.







share|improve this question

















  • 2




    Project managers are supposed to be tough on you. What you do is pick up your performance so she has nothing to complain about you.
    – HLGEM
    Sep 1 '16 at 17:27






  • 4




    Have clear deliverables, and deliver on them. Communicate issues clearly and immediately.
    – Jon Custer
    Sep 1 '16 at 17:29










  • Is she also your manager, or do you have a separate manager?
    – thursdaysgeek
    Sep 2 '16 at 0:54






  • 1




    Does she treat other people the same way?
    – thursdaysgeek
    Sep 2 '16 at 0:55












up vote
0
down vote

favorite









up vote
0
down vote

favorite











I have a sense that my project manager is very picky with me. She speak bluntly. Her words made me uncomfortable sometimes. Once she reported a list of mistakes including very detailed ones I did to the director and I have heard of that from others. I still try to be nice to her and do whatever I can to meet her requirement. She kept being very demanding on me. I am wondering what I can do to improve this work relationship with her.







share|improve this question













I have a sense that my project manager is very picky with me. She speak bluntly. Her words made me uncomfortable sometimes. Once she reported a list of mistakes including very detailed ones I did to the director and I have heard of that from others. I still try to be nice to her and do whatever I can to meet her requirement. She kept being very demanding on me. I am wondering what I can do to improve this work relationship with her.









share|improve this question












share|improve this question




share|improve this question








edited Sep 2 '16 at 12:26









Richard U

77.2k56200307




77.2k56200307









asked Sep 1 '16 at 17:24









Snowy

241




241







  • 2




    Project managers are supposed to be tough on you. What you do is pick up your performance so she has nothing to complain about you.
    – HLGEM
    Sep 1 '16 at 17:27






  • 4




    Have clear deliverables, and deliver on them. Communicate issues clearly and immediately.
    – Jon Custer
    Sep 1 '16 at 17:29










  • Is she also your manager, or do you have a separate manager?
    – thursdaysgeek
    Sep 2 '16 at 0:54






  • 1




    Does she treat other people the same way?
    – thursdaysgeek
    Sep 2 '16 at 0:55












  • 2




    Project managers are supposed to be tough on you. What you do is pick up your performance so she has nothing to complain about you.
    – HLGEM
    Sep 1 '16 at 17:27






  • 4




    Have clear deliverables, and deliver on them. Communicate issues clearly and immediately.
    – Jon Custer
    Sep 1 '16 at 17:29










  • Is she also your manager, or do you have a separate manager?
    – thursdaysgeek
    Sep 2 '16 at 0:54






  • 1




    Does she treat other people the same way?
    – thursdaysgeek
    Sep 2 '16 at 0:55







2




2




Project managers are supposed to be tough on you. What you do is pick up your performance so she has nothing to complain about you.
– HLGEM
Sep 1 '16 at 17:27




Project managers are supposed to be tough on you. What you do is pick up your performance so she has nothing to complain about you.
– HLGEM
Sep 1 '16 at 17:27




4




4




Have clear deliverables, and deliver on them. Communicate issues clearly and immediately.
– Jon Custer
Sep 1 '16 at 17:29




Have clear deliverables, and deliver on them. Communicate issues clearly and immediately.
– Jon Custer
Sep 1 '16 at 17:29












Is she also your manager, or do you have a separate manager?
– thursdaysgeek
Sep 2 '16 at 0:54




Is she also your manager, or do you have a separate manager?
– thursdaysgeek
Sep 2 '16 at 0:54




1




1




Does she treat other people the same way?
– thursdaysgeek
Sep 2 '16 at 0:55




Does she treat other people the same way?
– thursdaysgeek
Sep 2 '16 at 0:55










2 Answers
2






active

oldest

votes

















up vote
3
down vote













Documentation, documentation, documentation. Your PM should be giving you a clear and detailed design doc. If that's not happening, then communicate that to her. Communicate that to your boss.



Depending on the culture, a PM is a manager with absolutely no authority and lots of responsibility. They are there to manage the scope, design and implementation of a project. All of that should come with very clear expectations with regards to



  • tasks to be performed

  • time alotted to perform tasks

  • deadline for completion

The more vague a PM is with any of these, the more trouble there will be. At the end of the day, she isn't your boss; just another client you are serving. But you should be talking to your boss about the problem(s) you are facing while working with this person.



If you are being provided with documentation and you are not delivering as designed, are going over budget, and missing deadlines...that is your problem and she's not being picky; she's doing her job.






share|improve this answer




























    up vote
    0
    down vote













    As a former Project Manager and current Program Manager I can tell you that it either her fault, or your fault that this is happening.



    PMs are just that - managers of a project, yes they are supposed to lead the team but that is more of a coach/taskmaster roal versus an actual manager/supervisor in most settings.



    So if she is providing clear instructions through scope documentation, a project plan/charter that spells out major deliverables and milestones as well as a detailed requirements list and/or infrastructure/software design plan and you are fumbling these - then is totally on you. She is tasking you, you fail so the only way for her as a PM to back down is for you to start producing.



    Now, if she is giving you high level business reqs and expecting you to to turn them into increments of a "done" product without any clear guidance or support she is not an effective PM and she is taking out frustration. That needs to be communicated to your Lead/Manager and her leadership as well.



    A third possibility is the PMO, Program Manager or PM Director is applying unnecessary pressure on her despite the job being done then there is not a whole lot you can do.



    End of the day she is human, and if you approach her tactfully, assuming you are not dropping the ball, that would be best avenue of approach.






    share|improve this answer





















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      2 Answers
      2






      active

      oldest

      votes








      2 Answers
      2






      active

      oldest

      votes









      active

      oldest

      votes






      active

      oldest

      votes








      up vote
      3
      down vote













      Documentation, documentation, documentation. Your PM should be giving you a clear and detailed design doc. If that's not happening, then communicate that to her. Communicate that to your boss.



      Depending on the culture, a PM is a manager with absolutely no authority and lots of responsibility. They are there to manage the scope, design and implementation of a project. All of that should come with very clear expectations with regards to



      • tasks to be performed

      • time alotted to perform tasks

      • deadline for completion

      The more vague a PM is with any of these, the more trouble there will be. At the end of the day, she isn't your boss; just another client you are serving. But you should be talking to your boss about the problem(s) you are facing while working with this person.



      If you are being provided with documentation and you are not delivering as designed, are going over budget, and missing deadlines...that is your problem and she's not being picky; she's doing her job.






      share|improve this answer

























        up vote
        3
        down vote













        Documentation, documentation, documentation. Your PM should be giving you a clear and detailed design doc. If that's not happening, then communicate that to her. Communicate that to your boss.



        Depending on the culture, a PM is a manager with absolutely no authority and lots of responsibility. They are there to manage the scope, design and implementation of a project. All of that should come with very clear expectations with regards to



        • tasks to be performed

        • time alotted to perform tasks

        • deadline for completion

        The more vague a PM is with any of these, the more trouble there will be. At the end of the day, she isn't your boss; just another client you are serving. But you should be talking to your boss about the problem(s) you are facing while working with this person.



        If you are being provided with documentation and you are not delivering as designed, are going over budget, and missing deadlines...that is your problem and she's not being picky; she's doing her job.






        share|improve this answer























          up vote
          3
          down vote










          up vote
          3
          down vote









          Documentation, documentation, documentation. Your PM should be giving you a clear and detailed design doc. If that's not happening, then communicate that to her. Communicate that to your boss.



          Depending on the culture, a PM is a manager with absolutely no authority and lots of responsibility. They are there to manage the scope, design and implementation of a project. All of that should come with very clear expectations with regards to



          • tasks to be performed

          • time alotted to perform tasks

          • deadline for completion

          The more vague a PM is with any of these, the more trouble there will be. At the end of the day, she isn't your boss; just another client you are serving. But you should be talking to your boss about the problem(s) you are facing while working with this person.



          If you are being provided with documentation and you are not delivering as designed, are going over budget, and missing deadlines...that is your problem and she's not being picky; she's doing her job.






          share|improve this answer













          Documentation, documentation, documentation. Your PM should be giving you a clear and detailed design doc. If that's not happening, then communicate that to her. Communicate that to your boss.



          Depending on the culture, a PM is a manager with absolutely no authority and lots of responsibility. They are there to manage the scope, design and implementation of a project. All of that should come with very clear expectations with regards to



          • tasks to be performed

          • time alotted to perform tasks

          • deadline for completion

          The more vague a PM is with any of these, the more trouble there will be. At the end of the day, she isn't your boss; just another client you are serving. But you should be talking to your boss about the problem(s) you are facing while working with this person.



          If you are being provided with documentation and you are not delivering as designed, are going over budget, and missing deadlines...that is your problem and she's not being picky; she's doing her job.







          share|improve this answer













          share|improve this answer



          share|improve this answer











          answered Sep 1 '16 at 20:41









          Steve Mangiameli

          70849




          70849






















              up vote
              0
              down vote













              As a former Project Manager and current Program Manager I can tell you that it either her fault, or your fault that this is happening.



              PMs are just that - managers of a project, yes they are supposed to lead the team but that is more of a coach/taskmaster roal versus an actual manager/supervisor in most settings.



              So if she is providing clear instructions through scope documentation, a project plan/charter that spells out major deliverables and milestones as well as a detailed requirements list and/or infrastructure/software design plan and you are fumbling these - then is totally on you. She is tasking you, you fail so the only way for her as a PM to back down is for you to start producing.



              Now, if she is giving you high level business reqs and expecting you to to turn them into increments of a "done" product without any clear guidance or support she is not an effective PM and she is taking out frustration. That needs to be communicated to your Lead/Manager and her leadership as well.



              A third possibility is the PMO, Program Manager or PM Director is applying unnecessary pressure on her despite the job being done then there is not a whole lot you can do.



              End of the day she is human, and if you approach her tactfully, assuming you are not dropping the ball, that would be best avenue of approach.






              share|improve this answer

























                up vote
                0
                down vote













                As a former Project Manager and current Program Manager I can tell you that it either her fault, or your fault that this is happening.



                PMs are just that - managers of a project, yes they are supposed to lead the team but that is more of a coach/taskmaster roal versus an actual manager/supervisor in most settings.



                So if she is providing clear instructions through scope documentation, a project plan/charter that spells out major deliverables and milestones as well as a detailed requirements list and/or infrastructure/software design plan and you are fumbling these - then is totally on you. She is tasking you, you fail so the only way for her as a PM to back down is for you to start producing.



                Now, if she is giving you high level business reqs and expecting you to to turn them into increments of a "done" product without any clear guidance or support she is not an effective PM and she is taking out frustration. That needs to be communicated to your Lead/Manager and her leadership as well.



                A third possibility is the PMO, Program Manager or PM Director is applying unnecessary pressure on her despite the job being done then there is not a whole lot you can do.



                End of the day she is human, and if you approach her tactfully, assuming you are not dropping the ball, that would be best avenue of approach.






                share|improve this answer























                  up vote
                  0
                  down vote










                  up vote
                  0
                  down vote









                  As a former Project Manager and current Program Manager I can tell you that it either her fault, or your fault that this is happening.



                  PMs are just that - managers of a project, yes they are supposed to lead the team but that is more of a coach/taskmaster roal versus an actual manager/supervisor in most settings.



                  So if she is providing clear instructions through scope documentation, a project plan/charter that spells out major deliverables and milestones as well as a detailed requirements list and/or infrastructure/software design plan and you are fumbling these - then is totally on you. She is tasking you, you fail so the only way for her as a PM to back down is for you to start producing.



                  Now, if she is giving you high level business reqs and expecting you to to turn them into increments of a "done" product without any clear guidance or support she is not an effective PM and she is taking out frustration. That needs to be communicated to your Lead/Manager and her leadership as well.



                  A third possibility is the PMO, Program Manager or PM Director is applying unnecessary pressure on her despite the job being done then there is not a whole lot you can do.



                  End of the day she is human, and if you approach her tactfully, assuming you are not dropping the ball, that would be best avenue of approach.






                  share|improve this answer













                  As a former Project Manager and current Program Manager I can tell you that it either her fault, or your fault that this is happening.



                  PMs are just that - managers of a project, yes they are supposed to lead the team but that is more of a coach/taskmaster roal versus an actual manager/supervisor in most settings.



                  So if she is providing clear instructions through scope documentation, a project plan/charter that spells out major deliverables and milestones as well as a detailed requirements list and/or infrastructure/software design plan and you are fumbling these - then is totally on you. She is tasking you, you fail so the only way for her as a PM to back down is for you to start producing.



                  Now, if she is giving you high level business reqs and expecting you to to turn them into increments of a "done" product without any clear guidance or support she is not an effective PM and she is taking out frustration. That needs to be communicated to your Lead/Manager and her leadership as well.



                  A third possibility is the PMO, Program Manager or PM Director is applying unnecessary pressure on her despite the job being done then there is not a whole lot you can do.



                  End of the day she is human, and if you approach her tactfully, assuming you are not dropping the ball, that would be best avenue of approach.







                  share|improve this answer













                  share|improve this answer



                  share|improve this answer











                  answered Sep 7 '16 at 0:49









                  VaeInimicus

                  1,231312




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