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My ex-employer wants me back? My reporting manager never liked me [closed]
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Today my ex-employer asked me if I am can join company back. I am not sure how to evaluate.
I was the second employee of the off-shore branch. I was liking the job and learnt a lot of technologies. I was growing with the company, until the new manager was recruited to head the off-shore branch and started showing disrespect and started manipulating.
The reasons why I resigned from the company:
- I was not treated well.
- It was becoming a hostile environment.
- My immediate reporting manager was not respecting my presence and was unprofessional. He would constantly pass personal remarks. He was threatening me.
If I go back I will have to work with them again and report to the same manager, my ex-employer is saying he(manager) has changed and it will be a different situation now.
- Is there anything redeeming for me to go back to work for him?
- Would they hire and fire me?
- How do I evaluate?
More information:
- I am currently not working.
job-offer employer-relations employer
asked May 14 '15 at 8:54
Prabhanjan Naib
1074
closed as off-topic by Philipp, gnat, scaaahu, NotMe, IDrinkandIKnowThings May 14 '15 at 15:15
This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:
- "Questions asking for advice on what to do are not practical answerable questions (e.g. "what job should I take?", or "what skills should I learn?"). Questions should get answers explaining why and how to make a decision, not advice on what to do. For more information, click here." – Philipp, gnat, scaaahu, NotMe, IDrinkandIKnowThings
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
0
down vote
favorite
Today my ex-employer asked me if I am can join company back. I am not sure how to evaluate.
I was the second employee of the off-shore branch. I was liking the job and learnt a lot of technologies. I was growing with the company, until the new manager was recruited to head the off-shore branch and started showing disrespect and started manipulating.
The reasons why I resigned from the company:
- I was not treated well.
- It was becoming a hostile environment.
- My immediate reporting manager was not respecting my presence and was unprofessional. He would constantly pass personal remarks. He was threatening me.
If I go back I will have to work with them again and report to the same manager, my ex-employer is saying he(manager) has changed and it will be a different situation now.
- Is there anything redeeming for me to go back to work for him?
- Would they hire and fire me?
- How do I evaluate?
More information:
- I am currently not working.
job-offer employer-relations employer
asked May 14 '15 at 8:54
Prabhanjan Naib
1074
closed as off-topic by Philipp, gnat, scaaahu, NotMe, IDrinkandIKnowThings May 14 '15 at 15:15
This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:
- "Questions asking for advice on what to do are not practical answerable questions (e.g. "what job should I take?", or "what skills should I learn?"). Questions should get answers explaining why and how to make a decision, not advice on what to do. For more information, click here." – Philipp, gnat, scaaahu, NotMe, IDrinkandIKnowThings
3
Have you spoken with the reporting manager? If you're interested in going back, then it's you that needs to see and believe the change in behaviour, not the ex-employer.
– Hazel
May 14 '15 at 9:16
3
It doesn't sound like ANY of the reasons why you quit have gone away. And if they haven't.. going back would seem to be a very, very poor decision.
– Carson63000
May 14 '15 at 10:00
3
Is there any reason to leave the employer you are currently at? If not, then none of the other questions matter.
– NotMe
May 14 '15 at 13:39
2
Unless you desperately need a job for some reason, do not go back. Do not trust promises that the manager has changed. Things like threatening people can be deeply ingrained behavior patterns, which he'll likely to go back to, and no one should be in a position of getting regularly threatened. If you leave a job once due to environment being that bad, it's unlikely to have gotten significantly better, and it's also likely you will not be able to use it as a reference to get work later, as it's likely you will end up on bad terms, having already left once due to being really unhappy.
– Kai
May 14 '15 at 15:26
Have you asked if there's a position available outside of this manager's domain?
– Wesley Long
May 14 '15 at 17:48
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
0
down vote
favorite
up vote
0
down vote
favorite
Today my ex-employer asked me if I am can join company back. I am not sure how to evaluate.
I was the second employee of the off-shore branch. I was liking the job and learnt a lot of technologies. I was growing with the company, until the new manager was recruited to head the off-shore branch and started showing disrespect and started manipulating.
The reasons why I resigned from the company:
- I was not treated well.
- It was becoming a hostile environment.
- My immediate reporting manager was not respecting my presence and was unprofessional. He would constantly pass personal remarks. He was threatening me.
If I go back I will have to work with them again and report to the same manager, my ex-employer is saying he(manager) has changed and it will be a different situation now.
- Is there anything redeeming for me to go back to work for him?
- Would they hire and fire me?
- How do I evaluate?
More information:
- I am currently not working.
job-offer employer-relations employer
asked May 14 '15 at 8:54
Prabhanjan Naib
1074
Today my ex-employer asked me if I am can join company back. I am not sure how to evaluate.
I was the second employee of the off-shore branch. I was liking the job and learnt a lot of technologies. I was growing with the company, until the new manager was recruited to head the off-shore branch and started showing disrespect and started manipulating.
The reasons why I resigned from the company:
- I was not treated well.
- It was becoming a hostile environment.
- My immediate reporting manager was not respecting my presence and was unprofessional. He would constantly pass personal remarks. He was threatening me.
If I go back I will have to work with them again and report to the same manager, my ex-employer is saying he(manager) has changed and it will be a different situation now.
- Is there anything redeeming for me to go back to work for him?
- Would they hire and fire me?
- How do I evaluate?
More information:
- I am currently not working.
job-offer employer-relations employer
asked May 14 '15 at 8:54
Prabhanjan Naib
1074
edited May 14 '15 at 14:32
asked May 14 '15 at 8:54
Prabhanjan Naib
1074
asked May 14 '15 at 8:54
Prabhanjan Naib
1074
asked May 14 '15 at 8:54
Prabhanjan Naib
1074
1074
closed as off-topic by Philipp, gnat, scaaahu, NotMe, IDrinkandIKnowThings May 14 '15 at 15:15
This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:
- "Questions asking for advice on what to do are not practical answerable questions (e.g. "what job should I take?", or "what skills should I learn?"). Questions should get answers explaining why and how to make a decision, not advice on what to do. For more information, click here." – Philipp, gnat, scaaahu, NotMe, IDrinkandIKnowThings
closed as off-topic by Philipp, gnat, scaaahu, NotMe, IDrinkandIKnowThings May 14 '15 at 15:15
This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:
- "Questions asking for advice on what to do are not practical answerable questions (e.g. "what job should I take?", or "what skills should I learn?"). Questions should get answers explaining why and how to make a decision, not advice on what to do. For more information, click here." – Philipp, gnat, scaaahu, NotMe, IDrinkandIKnowThings
3
Have you spoken with the reporting manager? If you're interested in going back, then it's you that needs to see and believe the change in behaviour, not the ex-employer.
– Hazel
May 14 '15 at 9:16
3
It doesn't sound like ANY of the reasons why you quit have gone away. And if they haven't.. going back would seem to be a very, very poor decision.
– Carson63000
May 14 '15 at 10:00
3
Is there any reason to leave the employer you are currently at? If not, then none of the other questions matter.
– NotMe
May 14 '15 at 13:39
2
Unless you desperately need a job for some reason, do not go back. Do not trust promises that the manager has changed. Things like threatening people can be deeply ingrained behavior patterns, which he'll likely to go back to, and no one should be in a position of getting regularly threatened. If you leave a job once due to environment being that bad, it's unlikely to have gotten significantly better, and it's also likely you will not be able to use it as a reference to get work later, as it's likely you will end up on bad terms, having already left once due to being really unhappy.
– Kai
May 14 '15 at 15:26
Have you asked if there's a position available outside of this manager's domain?
– Wesley Long
May 14 '15 at 17:48
suggest improvements |Â
3
Have you spoken with the reporting manager? If you're interested in going back, then it's you that needs to see and believe the change in behaviour, not the ex-employer.
– Hazel
May 14 '15 at 9:16
3
It doesn't sound like ANY of the reasons why you quit have gone away. And if they haven't.. going back would seem to be a very, very poor decision.
– Carson63000
May 14 '15 at 10:00
3
Is there any reason to leave the employer you are currently at? If not, then none of the other questions matter.
– NotMe
May 14 '15 at 13:39
2
Unless you desperately need a job for some reason, do not go back. Do not trust promises that the manager has changed. Things like threatening people can be deeply ingrained behavior patterns, which he'll likely to go back to, and no one should be in a position of getting regularly threatened. If you leave a job once due to environment being that bad, it's unlikely to have gotten significantly better, and it's also likely you will not be able to use it as a reference to get work later, as it's likely you will end up on bad terms, having already left once due to being really unhappy.
– Kai
May 14 '15 at 15:26
Have you asked if there's a position available outside of this manager's domain?
– Wesley Long
May 14 '15 at 17:48
3
3
Have you spoken with the reporting manager? If you're interested in going back, then it's you that needs to see and believe the change in behaviour, not the ex-employer.
– Hazel
May 14 '15 at 9:16
Have you spoken with the reporting manager? If you're interested in going back, then it's you that needs to see and believe the change in behaviour, not the ex-employer.
– Hazel
May 14 '15 at 9:16
3
3
It doesn't sound like ANY of the reasons why you quit have gone away. And if they haven't.. going back would seem to be a very, very poor decision.
– Carson63000
May 14 '15 at 10:00
It doesn't sound like ANY of the reasons why you quit have gone away. And if they haven't.. going back would seem to be a very, very poor decision.
– Carson63000
May 14 '15 at 10:00
3
3
Is there any reason to leave the employer you are currently at? If not, then none of the other questions matter.
– NotMe
May 14 '15 at 13:39
Is there any reason to leave the employer you are currently at? If not, then none of the other questions matter.
– NotMe
May 14 '15 at 13:39
2
2
Unless you desperately need a job for some reason, do not go back. Do not trust promises that the manager has changed. Things like threatening people can be deeply ingrained behavior patterns, which he'll likely to go back to, and no one should be in a position of getting regularly threatened. If you leave a job once due to environment being that bad, it's unlikely to have gotten significantly better, and it's also likely you will not be able to use it as a reference to get work later, as it's likely you will end up on bad terms, having already left once due to being really unhappy.
– Kai
May 14 '15 at 15:26
Unless you desperately need a job for some reason, do not go back. Do not trust promises that the manager has changed. Things like threatening people can be deeply ingrained behavior patterns, which he'll likely to go back to, and no one should be in a position of getting regularly threatened. If you leave a job once due to environment being that bad, it's unlikely to have gotten significantly better, and it's also likely you will not be able to use it as a reference to get work later, as it's likely you will end up on bad terms, having already left once due to being really unhappy.
– Kai
May 14 '15 at 15:26
Have you asked if there's a position available outside of this manager's domain?
– Wesley Long
May 14 '15 at 17:48
Have you asked if there's a position available outside of this manager's domain?
– Wesley Long
May 14 '15 at 17:48
suggest improvements |Â
3 Answers
3
active
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up vote
4
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Your ex-employer says that your reporting manager changed. So your ex-employer is acknowledging your reporting manager's bad behavior. It's up to you to do the leg work and find out for yourself whether the reporting manager actually changed and whether it has changed enough to matter to you.
I'd call the reporting manager and put him on the spot and under stress. I'll note that if your reporting manager has truly changed, then he shouldn't feel under stress from your questions. "[Fill in name of your ex-employer] wants me back in. What do you think of his idea?" Next question: "What was your evaluation of my performance back then?" If you sense ANY hostility in the reporting manager's answer, you know what to do. You could follow up with "What do you think I could have done to improve my performance by you?" Look for any hint of hostility or unprofessionalism on his part. If at the end of your questioning, you decide that you still can't trust the reporting manager, say so to your ex-employer and don't look back.
answered May 14 '15 at 10:54
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
2
Excellent answer. I would however insist on a formal interview with the reporting manager, not an informal phone call. And I would ask explicitly what he acknowledges was wrong last time, and what is going to be different this time around. And I would then make sure this is put in writing.
– DJClayworth
May 14 '15 at 13:46
My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:35
3
So you are saying that both the employer and the reporting manager are each other's evil twin? If that's what you are saying, then you are the canary who flew off the bird cage to get away from the stares of the tomcat, and who is considering flying back into the bird cage :) My advice is, keep well away from tomcats. Your ex-employer saying that there is nothing wrong with the reporting manager is like Dracula's mother saying that there is nothing wrong with her son.
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:57
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
2
down vote
You have to view this as you would any approach by another company - will you get a better package by moving than you will by staying? That means weighing up the usual factors:
- salary
- work environment
- scope for advancement
- work-life balance
- damage caused by burning bridges
In this case you happen to have inside knowledge about the approach - that you will be working for an individual that made your last spell so bad you left. How many of the above factors are good enough that they will compensate if he turns out to be as bad as before, or only marginally better? People do not have complete personality changes - he may treat you more professionally because he's been warned about his behaviour but he won't suddenly like you.
Personally, it sounds like the employer is desperate for someone who can slot in quickly (has your successor quit, perhaps?), in which case he obviously has to convince you things have changed. I would be very wary; if things quickly go sour again then it will be very bad for your CV.
answered May 14 '15 at 10:01
Julia Hayward
12k53438
I am the only resource who is trained under that technology.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:41
1
That's what I feared. The more they need specifically you (and not just a good quality person to fill the role), the more incentive they have to tell you what you want to hear, not what is true.
– Julia Hayward
May 14 '15 at 14:52
On the other hand, the more they need you, the more you can demand from them. Including more money and not reporting to that idiot.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 21:53
1
@keshlam, yes that is true. We had an employee who got 100% raise and a private office to return to her old company two months later after her replacement managed to trash the production database.
– HLGEM
May 15 '15 at 17:37
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
2
down vote
Forget money, advancement etc. This was a toxic workplace. If you really want to consider going back, there are two linked questions to ask:
- What was the manager's problem with you?
- Who is asking you back?
It's possible the manager was going through something at the time, and they realise they were out of line. If you have some idea that you were just collateral damage (rather than the intended victim), you may be able to repair the relationship with the manager.
But part of this depends on the second question. If the manager wants you back and wants to build again, you might be ok. If your returning is being forced on the manager, it will return to what was happening before. Maybe not immediately, but it will. Also be sure you aren't being set up to take the blame for something by the manager.
If it was me, I doubt I could find it in me to return if I'd had no alternative but resign, even if they offered me a king's ransom.
answered May 14 '15 at 12:19
The Wandering Dev Manager
29.8k956107
6
My own reaction would be "If I would be reporting to the same manager, not a chance. Get him out of the way -- and make sure his replacement knows what this guy did wrong so he doesn't make the same mistakes -- and we can discuss it. And I'd better get a significant salary boost, both because you clearly need me and because I'm taking a chance on you after having been burned before." I'm not sure whether a consulting engagement would be any safer, but it is another option.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 13:52
Take the king's ransom and when the gold and silver is in your hands, resign - assuming there is a king's ransom to put your hands on, that is, given people's tendency to exaggerate :)
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:28
1. My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors. I think my employer likes to micro-control everything and everyone. 2. Founder of the company.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:38
suggest improvements |Â
3 Answers
3
active
oldest
votes
3 Answers
3
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
up vote
4
down vote
Your ex-employer says that your reporting manager changed. So your ex-employer is acknowledging your reporting manager's bad behavior. It's up to you to do the leg work and find out for yourself whether the reporting manager actually changed and whether it has changed enough to matter to you.
I'd call the reporting manager and put him on the spot and under stress. I'll note that if your reporting manager has truly changed, then he shouldn't feel under stress from your questions. "[Fill in name of your ex-employer] wants me back in. What do you think of his idea?" Next question: "What was your evaluation of my performance back then?" If you sense ANY hostility in the reporting manager's answer, you know what to do. You could follow up with "What do you think I could have done to improve my performance by you?" Look for any hint of hostility or unprofessionalism on his part. If at the end of your questioning, you decide that you still can't trust the reporting manager, say so to your ex-employer and don't look back.
answered May 14 '15 at 10:54
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
2
Excellent answer. I would however insist on a formal interview with the reporting manager, not an informal phone call. And I would ask explicitly what he acknowledges was wrong last time, and what is going to be different this time around. And I would then make sure this is put in writing.
– DJClayworth
May 14 '15 at 13:46
My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:35
3
So you are saying that both the employer and the reporting manager are each other's evil twin? If that's what you are saying, then you are the canary who flew off the bird cage to get away from the stares of the tomcat, and who is considering flying back into the bird cage :) My advice is, keep well away from tomcats. Your ex-employer saying that there is nothing wrong with the reporting manager is like Dracula's mother saying that there is nothing wrong with her son.
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:57
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
4
down vote
Your ex-employer says that your reporting manager changed. So your ex-employer is acknowledging your reporting manager's bad behavior. It's up to you to do the leg work and find out for yourself whether the reporting manager actually changed and whether it has changed enough to matter to you.
I'd call the reporting manager and put him on the spot and under stress. I'll note that if your reporting manager has truly changed, then he shouldn't feel under stress from your questions. "[Fill in name of your ex-employer] wants me back in. What do you think of his idea?" Next question: "What was your evaluation of my performance back then?" If you sense ANY hostility in the reporting manager's answer, you know what to do. You could follow up with "What do you think I could have done to improve my performance by you?" Look for any hint of hostility or unprofessionalism on his part. If at the end of your questioning, you decide that you still can't trust the reporting manager, say so to your ex-employer and don't look back.
answered May 14 '15 at 10:54
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
2
Excellent answer. I would however insist on a formal interview with the reporting manager, not an informal phone call. And I would ask explicitly what he acknowledges was wrong last time, and what is going to be different this time around. And I would then make sure this is put in writing.
– DJClayworth
May 14 '15 at 13:46
My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:35
3
So you are saying that both the employer and the reporting manager are each other's evil twin? If that's what you are saying, then you are the canary who flew off the bird cage to get away from the stares of the tomcat, and who is considering flying back into the bird cage :) My advice is, keep well away from tomcats. Your ex-employer saying that there is nothing wrong with the reporting manager is like Dracula's mother saying that there is nothing wrong with her son.
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:57
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
4
down vote
up vote
4
down vote
Your ex-employer says that your reporting manager changed. So your ex-employer is acknowledging your reporting manager's bad behavior. It's up to you to do the leg work and find out for yourself whether the reporting manager actually changed and whether it has changed enough to matter to you.
I'd call the reporting manager and put him on the spot and under stress. I'll note that if your reporting manager has truly changed, then he shouldn't feel under stress from your questions. "[Fill in name of your ex-employer] wants me back in. What do you think of his idea?" Next question: "What was your evaluation of my performance back then?" If you sense ANY hostility in the reporting manager's answer, you know what to do. You could follow up with "What do you think I could have done to improve my performance by you?" Look for any hint of hostility or unprofessionalism on his part. If at the end of your questioning, you decide that you still can't trust the reporting manager, say so to your ex-employer and don't look back.
answered May 14 '15 at 10:54
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
Your ex-employer says that your reporting manager changed. So your ex-employer is acknowledging your reporting manager's bad behavior. It's up to you to do the leg work and find out for yourself whether the reporting manager actually changed and whether it has changed enough to matter to you.
I'd call the reporting manager and put him on the spot and under stress. I'll note that if your reporting manager has truly changed, then he shouldn't feel under stress from your questions. "[Fill in name of your ex-employer] wants me back in. What do you think of his idea?" Next question: "What was your evaluation of my performance back then?" If you sense ANY hostility in the reporting manager's answer, you know what to do. You could follow up with "What do you think I could have done to improve my performance by you?" Look for any hint of hostility or unprofessionalism on his part. If at the end of your questioning, you decide that you still can't trust the reporting manager, say so to your ex-employer and don't look back.
answered May 14 '15 at 10:54
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
edited May 14 '15 at 11:01
answered May 14 '15 at 10:54
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
answered May 14 '15 at 10:54
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
answered May 14 '15 at 10:54
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
68.9k7118254
2
Excellent answer. I would however insist on a formal interview with the reporting manager, not an informal phone call. And I would ask explicitly what he acknowledges was wrong last time, and what is going to be different this time around. And I would then make sure this is put in writing.
– DJClayworth
May 14 '15 at 13:46
My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:35
3
So you are saying that both the employer and the reporting manager are each other's evil twin? If that's what you are saying, then you are the canary who flew off the bird cage to get away from the stares of the tomcat, and who is considering flying back into the bird cage :) My advice is, keep well away from tomcats. Your ex-employer saying that there is nothing wrong with the reporting manager is like Dracula's mother saying that there is nothing wrong with her son.
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:57
suggest improvements |Â
2
Excellent answer. I would however insist on a formal interview with the reporting manager, not an informal phone call. And I would ask explicitly what he acknowledges was wrong last time, and what is going to be different this time around. And I would then make sure this is put in writing.
– DJClayworth
May 14 '15 at 13:46
My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:35
3
So you are saying that both the employer and the reporting manager are each other's evil twin? If that's what you are saying, then you are the canary who flew off the bird cage to get away from the stares of the tomcat, and who is considering flying back into the bird cage :) My advice is, keep well away from tomcats. Your ex-employer saying that there is nothing wrong with the reporting manager is like Dracula's mother saying that there is nothing wrong with her son.
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:57
2
2
Excellent answer. I would however insist on a formal interview with the reporting manager, not an informal phone call. And I would ask explicitly what he acknowledges was wrong last time, and what is going to be different this time around. And I would then make sure this is put in writing.
– DJClayworth
May 14 '15 at 13:46
Excellent answer. I would however insist on a formal interview with the reporting manager, not an informal phone call. And I would ask explicitly what he acknowledges was wrong last time, and what is going to be different this time around. And I would then make sure this is put in writing.
– DJClayworth
May 14 '15 at 13:46
My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:35
My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:35
3
3
So you are saying that both the employer and the reporting manager are each other's evil twin? If that's what you are saying, then you are the canary who flew off the bird cage to get away from the stares of the tomcat, and who is considering flying back into the bird cage :) My advice is, keep well away from tomcats. Your ex-employer saying that there is nothing wrong with the reporting manager is like Dracula's mother saying that there is nothing wrong with her son.
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:57
So you are saying that both the employer and the reporting manager are each other's evil twin? If that's what you are saying, then you are the canary who flew off the bird cage to get away from the stares of the tomcat, and who is considering flying back into the bird cage :) My advice is, keep well away from tomcats. Your ex-employer saying that there is nothing wrong with the reporting manager is like Dracula's mother saying that there is nothing wrong with her son.
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:57
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
2
down vote
You have to view this as you would any approach by another company - will you get a better package by moving than you will by staying? That means weighing up the usual factors:
- salary
- work environment
- scope for advancement
- work-life balance
- damage caused by burning bridges
In this case you happen to have inside knowledge about the approach - that you will be working for an individual that made your last spell so bad you left. How many of the above factors are good enough that they will compensate if he turns out to be as bad as before, or only marginally better? People do not have complete personality changes - he may treat you more professionally because he's been warned about his behaviour but he won't suddenly like you.
Personally, it sounds like the employer is desperate for someone who can slot in quickly (has your successor quit, perhaps?), in which case he obviously has to convince you things have changed. I would be very wary; if things quickly go sour again then it will be very bad for your CV.
answered May 14 '15 at 10:01
Julia Hayward
12k53438
I am the only resource who is trained under that technology.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:41
1
That's what I feared. The more they need specifically you (and not just a good quality person to fill the role), the more incentive they have to tell you what you want to hear, not what is true.
– Julia Hayward
May 14 '15 at 14:52
On the other hand, the more they need you, the more you can demand from them. Including more money and not reporting to that idiot.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 21:53
1
@keshlam, yes that is true. We had an employee who got 100% raise and a private office to return to her old company two months later after her replacement managed to trash the production database.
– HLGEM
May 15 '15 at 17:37
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
2
down vote
You have to view this as you would any approach by another company - will you get a better package by moving than you will by staying? That means weighing up the usual factors:
- salary
- work environment
- scope for advancement
- work-life balance
- damage caused by burning bridges
In this case you happen to have inside knowledge about the approach - that you will be working for an individual that made your last spell so bad you left. How many of the above factors are good enough that they will compensate if he turns out to be as bad as before, or only marginally better? People do not have complete personality changes - he may treat you more professionally because he's been warned about his behaviour but he won't suddenly like you.
Personally, it sounds like the employer is desperate for someone who can slot in quickly (has your successor quit, perhaps?), in which case he obviously has to convince you things have changed. I would be very wary; if things quickly go sour again then it will be very bad for your CV.
answered May 14 '15 at 10:01
Julia Hayward
12k53438
I am the only resource who is trained under that technology.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:41
1
That's what I feared. The more they need specifically you (and not just a good quality person to fill the role), the more incentive they have to tell you what you want to hear, not what is true.
– Julia Hayward
May 14 '15 at 14:52
On the other hand, the more they need you, the more you can demand from them. Including more money and not reporting to that idiot.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 21:53
1
@keshlam, yes that is true. We had an employee who got 100% raise and a private office to return to her old company two months later after her replacement managed to trash the production database.
– HLGEM
May 15 '15 at 17:37
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
2
down vote
up vote
2
down vote
You have to view this as you would any approach by another company - will you get a better package by moving than you will by staying? That means weighing up the usual factors:
- salary
- work environment
- scope for advancement
- work-life balance
- damage caused by burning bridges
In this case you happen to have inside knowledge about the approach - that you will be working for an individual that made your last spell so bad you left. How many of the above factors are good enough that they will compensate if he turns out to be as bad as before, or only marginally better? People do not have complete personality changes - he may treat you more professionally because he's been warned about his behaviour but he won't suddenly like you.
Personally, it sounds like the employer is desperate for someone who can slot in quickly (has your successor quit, perhaps?), in which case he obviously has to convince you things have changed. I would be very wary; if things quickly go sour again then it will be very bad for your CV.
answered May 14 '15 at 10:01
Julia Hayward
12k53438
You have to view this as you would any approach by another company - will you get a better package by moving than you will by staying? That means weighing up the usual factors:
- salary
- work environment
- scope for advancement
- work-life balance
- damage caused by burning bridges
In this case you happen to have inside knowledge about the approach - that you will be working for an individual that made your last spell so bad you left. How many of the above factors are good enough that they will compensate if he turns out to be as bad as before, or only marginally better? People do not have complete personality changes - he may treat you more professionally because he's been warned about his behaviour but he won't suddenly like you.
Personally, it sounds like the employer is desperate for someone who can slot in quickly (has your successor quit, perhaps?), in which case he obviously has to convince you things have changed. I would be very wary; if things quickly go sour again then it will be very bad for your CV.
answered May 14 '15 at 10:01
Julia Hayward
12k53438
answered May 14 '15 at 10:01
Julia Hayward
12k53438
answered May 14 '15 at 10:01
Julia Hayward
12k53438
answered May 14 '15 at 10:01
Julia Hayward
12k53438
12k53438
I am the only resource who is trained under that technology.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:41
1
That's what I feared. The more they need specifically you (and not just a good quality person to fill the role), the more incentive they have to tell you what you want to hear, not what is true.
– Julia Hayward
May 14 '15 at 14:52
On the other hand, the more they need you, the more you can demand from them. Including more money and not reporting to that idiot.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 21:53
1
@keshlam, yes that is true. We had an employee who got 100% raise and a private office to return to her old company two months later after her replacement managed to trash the production database.
– HLGEM
May 15 '15 at 17:37
suggest improvements |Â
I am the only resource who is trained under that technology.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:41
1
That's what I feared. The more they need specifically you (and not just a good quality person to fill the role), the more incentive they have to tell you what you want to hear, not what is true.
– Julia Hayward
May 14 '15 at 14:52
On the other hand, the more they need you, the more you can demand from them. Including more money and not reporting to that idiot.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 21:53
1
@keshlam, yes that is true. We had an employee who got 100% raise and a private office to return to her old company two months later after her replacement managed to trash the production database.
– HLGEM
May 15 '15 at 17:37
I am the only resource who is trained under that technology.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:41
I am the only resource who is trained under that technology.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:41
1
1
That's what I feared. The more they need specifically you (and not just a good quality person to fill the role), the more incentive they have to tell you what you want to hear, not what is true.
– Julia Hayward
May 14 '15 at 14:52
That's what I feared. The more they need specifically you (and not just a good quality person to fill the role), the more incentive they have to tell you what you want to hear, not what is true.
– Julia Hayward
May 14 '15 at 14:52
On the other hand, the more they need you, the more you can demand from them. Including more money and not reporting to that idiot.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 21:53
On the other hand, the more they need you, the more you can demand from them. Including more money and not reporting to that idiot.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 21:53
1
1
@keshlam, yes that is true. We had an employee who got 100% raise and a private office to return to her old company two months later after her replacement managed to trash the production database.
– HLGEM
May 15 '15 at 17:37
@keshlam, yes that is true. We had an employee who got 100% raise and a private office to return to her old company two months later after her replacement managed to trash the production database.
– HLGEM
May 15 '15 at 17:37
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
2
down vote
Forget money, advancement etc. This was a toxic workplace. If you really want to consider going back, there are two linked questions to ask:
- What was the manager's problem with you?
- Who is asking you back?
It's possible the manager was going through something at the time, and they realise they were out of line. If you have some idea that you were just collateral damage (rather than the intended victim), you may be able to repair the relationship with the manager.
But part of this depends on the second question. If the manager wants you back and wants to build again, you might be ok. If your returning is being forced on the manager, it will return to what was happening before. Maybe not immediately, but it will. Also be sure you aren't being set up to take the blame for something by the manager.
If it was me, I doubt I could find it in me to return if I'd had no alternative but resign, even if they offered me a king's ransom.
answered May 14 '15 at 12:19
The Wandering Dev Manager
29.8k956107
6
My own reaction would be "If I would be reporting to the same manager, not a chance. Get him out of the way -- and make sure his replacement knows what this guy did wrong so he doesn't make the same mistakes -- and we can discuss it. And I'd better get a significant salary boost, both because you clearly need me and because I'm taking a chance on you after having been burned before." I'm not sure whether a consulting engagement would be any safer, but it is another option.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 13:52
Take the king's ransom and when the gold and silver is in your hands, resign - assuming there is a king's ransom to put your hands on, that is, given people's tendency to exaggerate :)
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:28
1. My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors. I think my employer likes to micro-control everything and everyone. 2. Founder of the company.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:38
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
2
down vote
Forget money, advancement etc. This was a toxic workplace. If you really want to consider going back, there are two linked questions to ask:
- What was the manager's problem with you?
- Who is asking you back?
It's possible the manager was going through something at the time, and they realise they were out of line. If you have some idea that you were just collateral damage (rather than the intended victim), you may be able to repair the relationship with the manager.
But part of this depends on the second question. If the manager wants you back and wants to build again, you might be ok. If your returning is being forced on the manager, it will return to what was happening before. Maybe not immediately, but it will. Also be sure you aren't being set up to take the blame for something by the manager.
If it was me, I doubt I could find it in me to return if I'd had no alternative but resign, even if they offered me a king's ransom.
answered May 14 '15 at 12:19
The Wandering Dev Manager
29.8k956107
6
My own reaction would be "If I would be reporting to the same manager, not a chance. Get him out of the way -- and make sure his replacement knows what this guy did wrong so he doesn't make the same mistakes -- and we can discuss it. And I'd better get a significant salary boost, both because you clearly need me and because I'm taking a chance on you after having been burned before." I'm not sure whether a consulting engagement would be any safer, but it is another option.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 13:52
Take the king's ransom and when the gold and silver is in your hands, resign - assuming there is a king's ransom to put your hands on, that is, given people's tendency to exaggerate :)
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:28
1. My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors. I think my employer likes to micro-control everything and everyone. 2. Founder of the company.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:38
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
2
down vote
up vote
2
down vote
Forget money, advancement etc. This was a toxic workplace. If you really want to consider going back, there are two linked questions to ask:
- What was the manager's problem with you?
- Who is asking you back?
It's possible the manager was going through something at the time, and they realise they were out of line. If you have some idea that you were just collateral damage (rather than the intended victim), you may be able to repair the relationship with the manager.
But part of this depends on the second question. If the manager wants you back and wants to build again, you might be ok. If your returning is being forced on the manager, it will return to what was happening before. Maybe not immediately, but it will. Also be sure you aren't being set up to take the blame for something by the manager.
If it was me, I doubt I could find it in me to return if I'd had no alternative but resign, even if they offered me a king's ransom.
answered May 14 '15 at 12:19
The Wandering Dev Manager
29.8k956107
Forget money, advancement etc. This was a toxic workplace. If you really want to consider going back, there are two linked questions to ask:
- What was the manager's problem with you?
- Who is asking you back?
It's possible the manager was going through something at the time, and they realise they were out of line. If you have some idea that you were just collateral damage (rather than the intended victim), you may be able to repair the relationship with the manager.
But part of this depends on the second question. If the manager wants you back and wants to build again, you might be ok. If your returning is being forced on the manager, it will return to what was happening before. Maybe not immediately, but it will. Also be sure you aren't being set up to take the blame for something by the manager.
If it was me, I doubt I could find it in me to return if I'd had no alternative but resign, even if they offered me a king's ransom.
answered May 14 '15 at 12:19
The Wandering Dev Manager
29.8k956107
answered May 14 '15 at 12:19
The Wandering Dev Manager
29.8k956107
answered May 14 '15 at 12:19
The Wandering Dev Manager
29.8k956107
answered May 14 '15 at 12:19
The Wandering Dev Manager
29.8k956107
29.8k956107
6
My own reaction would be "If I would be reporting to the same manager, not a chance. Get him out of the way -- and make sure his replacement knows what this guy did wrong so he doesn't make the same mistakes -- and we can discuss it. And I'd better get a significant salary boost, both because you clearly need me and because I'm taking a chance on you after having been burned before." I'm not sure whether a consulting engagement would be any safer, but it is another option.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 13:52
Take the king's ransom and when the gold and silver is in your hands, resign - assuming there is a king's ransom to put your hands on, that is, given people's tendency to exaggerate :)
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:28
1. My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors. I think my employer likes to micro-control everything and everyone. 2. Founder of the company.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:38
suggest improvements |Â
6
My own reaction would be "If I would be reporting to the same manager, not a chance. Get him out of the way -- and make sure his replacement knows what this guy did wrong so he doesn't make the same mistakes -- and we can discuss it. And I'd better get a significant salary boost, both because you clearly need me and because I'm taking a chance on you after having been burned before." I'm not sure whether a consulting engagement would be any safer, but it is another option.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 13:52
Take the king's ransom and when the gold and silver is in your hands, resign - assuming there is a king's ransom to put your hands on, that is, given people's tendency to exaggerate :)
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:28
1. My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors. I think my employer likes to micro-control everything and everyone. 2. Founder of the company.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:38
6
6
My own reaction would be "If I would be reporting to the same manager, not a chance. Get him out of the way -- and make sure his replacement knows what this guy did wrong so he doesn't make the same mistakes -- and we can discuss it. And I'd better get a significant salary boost, both because you clearly need me and because I'm taking a chance on you after having been burned before." I'm not sure whether a consulting engagement would be any safer, but it is another option.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 13:52
My own reaction would be "If I would be reporting to the same manager, not a chance. Get him out of the way -- and make sure his replacement knows what this guy did wrong so he doesn't make the same mistakes -- and we can discuss it. And I'd better get a significant salary boost, both because you clearly need me and because I'm taking a chance on you after having been burned before." I'm not sure whether a consulting engagement would be any safer, but it is another option.
– keshlam
May 14 '15 at 13:52
Take the king's ransom and when the gold and silver is in your hands, resign - assuming there is a king's ransom to put your hands on, that is, given people's tendency to exaggerate :)
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:28
Take the king's ransom and when the gold and silver is in your hands, resign - assuming there is a king's ransom to put your hands on, that is, given people's tendency to exaggerate :)
– Vietnhi Phuvan
May 14 '15 at 14:28
1. My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors. I think my employer likes to micro-control everything and everyone. 2. Founder of the company.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:38
1. My employer then when I complained about what was happening he told me he has appointed him to be like what he was doing --- manipulating, poking, intruding everyone's personal space, standing behind and peeping into the monitors. I think my employer likes to micro-control everything and everyone. 2. Founder of the company.
– Prabhanjan Naib
May 14 '15 at 14:38
suggest improvements |Â
3
Have you spoken with the reporting manager? If you're interested in going back, then it's you that needs to see and believe the change in behaviour, not the ex-employer.
– Hazel
May 14 '15 at 9:16
3
It doesn't sound like ANY of the reasons why you quit have gone away. And if they haven't.. going back would seem to be a very, very poor decision.
– Carson63000
May 14 '15 at 10:00
3
Is there any reason to leave the employer you are currently at? If not, then none of the other questions matter.
– NotMe
May 14 '15 at 13:39
2
Unless you desperately need a job for some reason, do not go back. Do not trust promises that the manager has changed. Things like threatening people can be deeply ingrained behavior patterns, which he'll likely to go back to, and no one should be in a position of getting regularly threatened. If you leave a job once due to environment being that bad, it's unlikely to have gotten significantly better, and it's also likely you will not be able to use it as a reference to get work later, as it's likely you will end up on bad terms, having already left once due to being really unhappy.
– Kai
May 14 '15 at 15:26
Have you asked if there's a position available outside of this manager's domain?
– Wesley Long
May 14 '15 at 17:48