Mixing
Colleague feedback - asking them to relax
Clash Royale CLAN TAG#URR8PPP
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I currently work in a fast paced I.T environment and have to give one of my colleagues feedback (I am not his manager).
He is a very strong developer with excellent work ethics which I have wrote down in his feedback. In the areas for improvement I want to focus on that he can sometimes be overwhelmed and can get stressed from time to time.
My question is, how can I constructively phrase this?
I want the feedback to be constructive and not to come across negative.
stress feedback
asked Nov 24 '14 at 9:23
user29891
182
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
3
down vote
favorite
I currently work in a fast paced I.T environment and have to give one of my colleagues feedback (I am not his manager).
He is a very strong developer with excellent work ethics which I have wrote down in his feedback. In the areas for improvement I want to focus on that he can sometimes be overwhelmed and can get stressed from time to time.
My question is, how can I constructively phrase this?
I want the feedback to be constructive and not to come across negative.
stress feedback
asked Nov 24 '14 at 9:23
user29891
182
@teego1967 - This colleague has specifically requested feedback on what they can do better. He is a colleague and a friend who wants to improve their own ability, if I let it "slide" I don't see how he will benefit.
– user29891
Nov 24 '14 at 13:44
There's nothing wrong with providing such feedback when asked personally. I had thought your question was about an "on the record" exercise that is part of an annual review (eg read by others such as managment and HR and part of compensation decisions).
– teego1967
Nov 24 '14 at 15:14
When you say "overwhelmed and can get stressed" what do you mean? Everyone get's overwhelmed and stressed, it's their reaction to it that matters. And how you phrase you feedback should rely heavily on how they react to stress (since, you know, your review could be a stressor.) Could you clarify?
– Jay Carr
Sep 8 '16 at 23:59
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
3
down vote
favorite
up vote
3
down vote
favorite
I currently work in a fast paced I.T environment and have to give one of my colleagues feedback (I am not his manager).
He is a very strong developer with excellent work ethics which I have wrote down in his feedback. In the areas for improvement I want to focus on that he can sometimes be overwhelmed and can get stressed from time to time.
My question is, how can I constructively phrase this?
I want the feedback to be constructive and not to come across negative.
stress feedback
asked Nov 24 '14 at 9:23
user29891
182
I currently work in a fast paced I.T environment and have to give one of my colleagues feedback (I am not his manager).
He is a very strong developer with excellent work ethics which I have wrote down in his feedback. In the areas for improvement I want to focus on that he can sometimes be overwhelmed and can get stressed from time to time.
My question is, how can I constructively phrase this?
I want the feedback to be constructive and not to come across negative.
stress feedback
asked Nov 24 '14 at 9:23
user29891
182
asked Nov 24 '14 at 9:23
user29891
182
asked Nov 24 '14 at 9:23
user29891
182
asked Nov 24 '14 at 9:23
user29891
182
182
@teego1967 - This colleague has specifically requested feedback on what they can do better. He is a colleague and a friend who wants to improve their own ability, if I let it "slide" I don't see how he will benefit.
– user29891
Nov 24 '14 at 13:44
There's nothing wrong with providing such feedback when asked personally. I had thought your question was about an "on the record" exercise that is part of an annual review (eg read by others such as managment and HR and part of compensation decisions).
– teego1967
Nov 24 '14 at 15:14
When you say "overwhelmed and can get stressed" what do you mean? Everyone get's overwhelmed and stressed, it's their reaction to it that matters. And how you phrase you feedback should rely heavily on how they react to stress (since, you know, your review could be a stressor.) Could you clarify?
– Jay Carr
Sep 8 '16 at 23:59
suggest improvements |Â
@teego1967 - This colleague has specifically requested feedback on what they can do better. He is a colleague and a friend who wants to improve their own ability, if I let it "slide" I don't see how he will benefit.
– user29891
Nov 24 '14 at 13:44
There's nothing wrong with providing such feedback when asked personally. I had thought your question was about an "on the record" exercise that is part of an annual review (eg read by others such as managment and HR and part of compensation decisions).
– teego1967
Nov 24 '14 at 15:14
When you say "overwhelmed and can get stressed" what do you mean? Everyone get's overwhelmed and stressed, it's their reaction to it that matters. And how you phrase you feedback should rely heavily on how they react to stress (since, you know, your review could be a stressor.) Could you clarify?
– Jay Carr
Sep 8 '16 at 23:59
@teego1967 - This colleague has specifically requested feedback on what they can do better. He is a colleague and a friend who wants to improve their own ability, if I let it "slide" I don't see how he will benefit.
– user29891
Nov 24 '14 at 13:44
@teego1967 - This colleague has specifically requested feedback on what they can do better. He is a colleague and a friend who wants to improve their own ability, if I let it "slide" I don't see how he will benefit.
– user29891
Nov 24 '14 at 13:44
There's nothing wrong with providing such feedback when asked personally. I had thought your question was about an "on the record" exercise that is part of an annual review (eg read by others such as managment and HR and part of compensation decisions).
– teego1967
Nov 24 '14 at 15:14
There's nothing wrong with providing such feedback when asked personally. I had thought your question was about an "on the record" exercise that is part of an annual review (eg read by others such as managment and HR and part of compensation decisions).
– teego1967
Nov 24 '14 at 15:14
When you say "overwhelmed and can get stressed" what do you mean? Everyone get's overwhelmed and stressed, it's their reaction to it that matters. And how you phrase you feedback should rely heavily on how they react to stress (since, you know, your review could be a stressor.) Could you clarify?
– Jay Carr
Sep 8 '16 at 23:59
When you say "overwhelmed and can get stressed" what do you mean? Everyone get's overwhelmed and stressed, it's their reaction to it that matters. And how you phrase you feedback should rely heavily on how they react to stress (since, you know, your review could be a stressor.) Could you clarify?
– Jay Carr
Sep 8 '16 at 23:59
suggest improvements |Â
1 Answer
1
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votes
up vote
2
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accepted
You are not coming across as negative. At least not from the feedback you have given as described in your post.
If that developer gets short-tempered as a result of the stress, then you need to point it out because people choose how they react to stimuli including bad stimuli and the developer is reacting badly to the bad stimuli when he could be making a better choice on how he reacts. That is, if he is getting short-tempered and harder to work with from the stress, of course.
Stress does not bring out the best in most of us and reacting positively and constructively to stress was, at least in my case, a matter of reconditioning myself to not let it get to my head. Fortunately, I took care of this business more than 35 years ago.
answered Nov 24 '14 at 9:40
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
suggest improvements |Â
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
up vote
2
down vote
accepted
You are not coming across as negative. At least not from the feedback you have given as described in your post.
If that developer gets short-tempered as a result of the stress, then you need to point it out because people choose how they react to stimuli including bad stimuli and the developer is reacting badly to the bad stimuli when he could be making a better choice on how he reacts. That is, if he is getting short-tempered and harder to work with from the stress, of course.
Stress does not bring out the best in most of us and reacting positively and constructively to stress was, at least in my case, a matter of reconditioning myself to not let it get to my head. Fortunately, I took care of this business more than 35 years ago.
answered Nov 24 '14 at 9:40
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
2
down vote
accepted
You are not coming across as negative. At least not from the feedback you have given as described in your post.
If that developer gets short-tempered as a result of the stress, then you need to point it out because people choose how they react to stimuli including bad stimuli and the developer is reacting badly to the bad stimuli when he could be making a better choice on how he reacts. That is, if he is getting short-tempered and harder to work with from the stress, of course.
Stress does not bring out the best in most of us and reacting positively and constructively to stress was, at least in my case, a matter of reconditioning myself to not let it get to my head. Fortunately, I took care of this business more than 35 years ago.
answered Nov 24 '14 at 9:40
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
suggest improvements |Â
up vote
2
down vote
accepted
up vote
2
down vote
accepted
You are not coming across as negative. At least not from the feedback you have given as described in your post.
If that developer gets short-tempered as a result of the stress, then you need to point it out because people choose how they react to stimuli including bad stimuli and the developer is reacting badly to the bad stimuli when he could be making a better choice on how he reacts. That is, if he is getting short-tempered and harder to work with from the stress, of course.
Stress does not bring out the best in most of us and reacting positively and constructively to stress was, at least in my case, a matter of reconditioning myself to not let it get to my head. Fortunately, I took care of this business more than 35 years ago.
answered Nov 24 '14 at 9:40
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
You are not coming across as negative. At least not from the feedback you have given as described in your post.
If that developer gets short-tempered as a result of the stress, then you need to point it out because people choose how they react to stimuli including bad stimuli and the developer is reacting badly to the bad stimuli when he could be making a better choice on how he reacts. That is, if he is getting short-tempered and harder to work with from the stress, of course.
Stress does not bring out the best in most of us and reacting positively and constructively to stress was, at least in my case, a matter of reconditioning myself to not let it get to my head. Fortunately, I took care of this business more than 35 years ago.
answered Nov 24 '14 at 9:40
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
answered Nov 24 '14 at 9:40
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
answered Nov 24 '14 at 9:40
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
answered Nov 24 '14 at 9:40
Vietnhi Phuvan
68.9k7118254
68.9k7118254
suggest improvements |Â
suggest improvements |Â
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@teego1967 - This colleague has specifically requested feedback on what they can do better. He is a colleague and a friend who wants to improve their own ability, if I let it "slide" I don't see how he will benefit.
– user29891
Nov 24 '14 at 13:44
There's nothing wrong with providing such feedback when asked personally. I had thought your question was about an "on the record" exercise that is part of an annual review (eg read by others such as managment and HR and part of compensation decisions).
– teego1967
Nov 24 '14 at 15:14
When you say "overwhelmed and can get stressed" what do you mean? Everyone get's overwhelmed and stressed, it's their reaction to it that matters. And how you phrase you feedback should rely heavily on how they react to stress (since, you know, your review could be a stressor.) Could you clarify?
– Jay Carr
Sep 8 '16 at 23:59