Dealing with a bipolar boss [closed]
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My boss is really a brilliant guy, gutsy, full of ideas and very driven. Lately he has been exhibiting a very irrational behavior, squandering deals, blaming everybody, and we are beginning to lose big customers. I've seen bipolar people before and it seems pretty clear to me (I am not a doctor so I can't say for sure)
How should one deal with this situation? Try to get help or just go work somewhere else?
work-environment management
closed as off-topic by Lilienthalâ¦, Chris E, mcknz, Myles, jcmeloni Jun 17 '16 at 15:12
This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:
- "Questions asking for advice on what to do are not practical answerable questions (e.g. "what job should I take?", or "what skills should I learn?"). Questions should get answers explaining why and how to make a decision, not advice on what to do. For more information, click here." â Lilienthal, Chris E, mcknz, Myles, jcmeloni
add a comment |Â
up vote
4
down vote
favorite
My boss is really a brilliant guy, gutsy, full of ideas and very driven. Lately he has been exhibiting a very irrational behavior, squandering deals, blaming everybody, and we are beginning to lose big customers. I've seen bipolar people before and it seems pretty clear to me (I am not a doctor so I can't say for sure)
How should one deal with this situation? Try to get help or just go work somewhere else?
work-environment management
closed as off-topic by Lilienthalâ¦, Chris E, mcknz, Myles, jcmeloni Jun 17 '16 at 15:12
This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:
- "Questions asking for advice on what to do are not practical answerable questions (e.g. "what job should I take?", or "what skills should I learn?"). Questions should get answers explaining why and how to make a decision, not advice on what to do. For more information, click here." â Lilienthal, Chris E, mcknz, Myles, jcmeloni
add a comment |Â
up vote
4
down vote
favorite
up vote
4
down vote
favorite
My boss is really a brilliant guy, gutsy, full of ideas and very driven. Lately he has been exhibiting a very irrational behavior, squandering deals, blaming everybody, and we are beginning to lose big customers. I've seen bipolar people before and it seems pretty clear to me (I am not a doctor so I can't say for sure)
How should one deal with this situation? Try to get help or just go work somewhere else?
work-environment management
My boss is really a brilliant guy, gutsy, full of ideas and very driven. Lately he has been exhibiting a very irrational behavior, squandering deals, blaming everybody, and we are beginning to lose big customers. I've seen bipolar people before and it seems pretty clear to me (I am not a doctor so I can't say for sure)
How should one deal with this situation? Try to get help or just go work somewhere else?
work-environment management
edited Jul 13 '12 at 13:48
Rarity
4,37643457
4,37643457
asked Jun 2 '12 at 0:53
user1220
4,80622644
4,80622644
closed as off-topic by Lilienthalâ¦, Chris E, mcknz, Myles, jcmeloni Jun 17 '16 at 15:12
This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:
- "Questions asking for advice on what to do are not practical answerable questions (e.g. "what job should I take?", or "what skills should I learn?"). Questions should get answers explaining why and how to make a decision, not advice on what to do. For more information, click here." â Lilienthal, Chris E, mcknz, Myles, jcmeloni
closed as off-topic by Lilienthalâ¦, Chris E, mcknz, Myles, jcmeloni Jun 17 '16 at 15:12
This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:
- "Questions asking for advice on what to do are not practical answerable questions (e.g. "what job should I take?", or "what skills should I learn?"). Questions should get answers explaining why and how to make a decision, not advice on what to do. For more information, click here." â Lilienthal, Chris E, mcknz, Myles, jcmeloni
add a comment |Â
add a comment |Â
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
up vote
15
down vote
accepted
First let me say that this is a difficult situation, and you don't know for sure if bipolar is the cause of your boss's unusual and counterproductive behavior. Regardless of the cause, the way to respond will be similar and will vary a lot depending on other aspects of each unique case.
It sounds like you suspect your boss is either untreated or the treatment is not working, because the behaviot is affecting your boss's ability to perform his job to his normal standards.
You ask whether to try to get help or to just work someplace else. The answer depends a lot on other aspects of the boss and your relationship with him. I'd suggest thinking through the following questions to decide if you should try to gently approach the issue, or just move on:
- Does your boss respond well to constructive feedback?
- Does he try to make changes when a problem is identified?
- Do you have a strong channel of communication with him?
- If this were about another employee rather than him directly, would he respond reasonably to such concerns?
- Are there others in the company you can go to with your concerns?
- Is there a precedent in your workplace for employee feedback on working environment or company policies and practices?
If you can think of a less significant situation that has been handled poorly or ignored, I wouldn't hold out hope that this one will be handled well. I've been in situations before where I've tried to address issues but the truth is that the management just does not have the skill or motivation to deal with complex and sensitive issues such as the one you describe, and I've never doubted that moving on was the right thing to do.
However, if the company is reasonable in other respects and deals with smaller issues well, and you have a good relationship with your boss, then it may make sense to try to discuss your concerns with your boss. Perhaps broach the subject by first stating your admiration and respect, and then gently expressing concern that something is amiss because recent behavior has been so inconsistent.
Thank you for the thoughtful answer. It didn't use to be like this, but now even the other senior partner gets its share of rage and dressing downs. He cannot deal with any feedback, and even when third parties are invited to help if they come up with anything negative about how the business is being ran he dismisses them. The telltale sign for me is - everybody else is at fault even though we have unanimity in our opinion that it is not the case.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:04
I'm sorry to say that doesnt sound good. Possibly talk to the other senior partner about your concerns and assess whether he or she is willing to attempt to broach the issue. If the other partner won't address it either, it may well be time for you to find a greener pasture.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 2 '12 at 2:16
Oh boy... I have been thinking about it, it is hard to do that after so many years. I have been reading about bipolar disease and to my astonishment the symptoms of mania episodes are all there. The other senior partner at meetings looks like a deer in the headlights and later he doesn't have the energy to do anything. I guess it is time to dust off my resume.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:24
2
Do keep in mind that the other senior partner may not have the same knowledge of bipolar disorder that you now do. If you think they would consider the information honestly, it might be good to talk to them (while also working on plan B), in case they are able to discuss the concerns with their partner and suggest treatment. It would be a good thing to do, but may not help anyhow because while a person is in a manic phase it is very hard to convince them anything is "wrong" and needs to be treated - they often feel energized and fearless.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 3 '12 at 16:49
3
I don't know if a clinical diagnosis of bipolar disorder is the right answer, since it sounds like both senior partners are desperate and depressed because business is bad. When there is no work at all, contracts that simply break even or aren't as much of a loss as having no work seem appealing. The burden of responsibility for one's employee's welfare can be crushing, especially when things aren't going well.
â David Navarre
Jul 23 '12 at 14:30
add a comment |Â
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
1 Answer
1
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
active
oldest
votes
up vote
15
down vote
accepted
First let me say that this is a difficult situation, and you don't know for sure if bipolar is the cause of your boss's unusual and counterproductive behavior. Regardless of the cause, the way to respond will be similar and will vary a lot depending on other aspects of each unique case.
It sounds like you suspect your boss is either untreated or the treatment is not working, because the behaviot is affecting your boss's ability to perform his job to his normal standards.
You ask whether to try to get help or to just work someplace else. The answer depends a lot on other aspects of the boss and your relationship with him. I'd suggest thinking through the following questions to decide if you should try to gently approach the issue, or just move on:
- Does your boss respond well to constructive feedback?
- Does he try to make changes when a problem is identified?
- Do you have a strong channel of communication with him?
- If this were about another employee rather than him directly, would he respond reasonably to such concerns?
- Are there others in the company you can go to with your concerns?
- Is there a precedent in your workplace for employee feedback on working environment or company policies and practices?
If you can think of a less significant situation that has been handled poorly or ignored, I wouldn't hold out hope that this one will be handled well. I've been in situations before where I've tried to address issues but the truth is that the management just does not have the skill or motivation to deal with complex and sensitive issues such as the one you describe, and I've never doubted that moving on was the right thing to do.
However, if the company is reasonable in other respects and deals with smaller issues well, and you have a good relationship with your boss, then it may make sense to try to discuss your concerns with your boss. Perhaps broach the subject by first stating your admiration and respect, and then gently expressing concern that something is amiss because recent behavior has been so inconsistent.
Thank you for the thoughtful answer. It didn't use to be like this, but now even the other senior partner gets its share of rage and dressing downs. He cannot deal with any feedback, and even when third parties are invited to help if they come up with anything negative about how the business is being ran he dismisses them. The telltale sign for me is - everybody else is at fault even though we have unanimity in our opinion that it is not the case.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:04
I'm sorry to say that doesnt sound good. Possibly talk to the other senior partner about your concerns and assess whether he or she is willing to attempt to broach the issue. If the other partner won't address it either, it may well be time for you to find a greener pasture.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 2 '12 at 2:16
Oh boy... I have been thinking about it, it is hard to do that after so many years. I have been reading about bipolar disease and to my astonishment the symptoms of mania episodes are all there. The other senior partner at meetings looks like a deer in the headlights and later he doesn't have the energy to do anything. I guess it is time to dust off my resume.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:24
2
Do keep in mind that the other senior partner may not have the same knowledge of bipolar disorder that you now do. If you think they would consider the information honestly, it might be good to talk to them (while also working on plan B), in case they are able to discuss the concerns with their partner and suggest treatment. It would be a good thing to do, but may not help anyhow because while a person is in a manic phase it is very hard to convince them anything is "wrong" and needs to be treated - they often feel energized and fearless.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 3 '12 at 16:49
3
I don't know if a clinical diagnosis of bipolar disorder is the right answer, since it sounds like both senior partners are desperate and depressed because business is bad. When there is no work at all, contracts that simply break even or aren't as much of a loss as having no work seem appealing. The burden of responsibility for one's employee's welfare can be crushing, especially when things aren't going well.
â David Navarre
Jul 23 '12 at 14:30
add a comment |Â
up vote
15
down vote
accepted
First let me say that this is a difficult situation, and you don't know for sure if bipolar is the cause of your boss's unusual and counterproductive behavior. Regardless of the cause, the way to respond will be similar and will vary a lot depending on other aspects of each unique case.
It sounds like you suspect your boss is either untreated or the treatment is not working, because the behaviot is affecting your boss's ability to perform his job to his normal standards.
You ask whether to try to get help or to just work someplace else. The answer depends a lot on other aspects of the boss and your relationship with him. I'd suggest thinking through the following questions to decide if you should try to gently approach the issue, or just move on:
- Does your boss respond well to constructive feedback?
- Does he try to make changes when a problem is identified?
- Do you have a strong channel of communication with him?
- If this were about another employee rather than him directly, would he respond reasonably to such concerns?
- Are there others in the company you can go to with your concerns?
- Is there a precedent in your workplace for employee feedback on working environment or company policies and practices?
If you can think of a less significant situation that has been handled poorly or ignored, I wouldn't hold out hope that this one will be handled well. I've been in situations before where I've tried to address issues but the truth is that the management just does not have the skill or motivation to deal with complex and sensitive issues such as the one you describe, and I've never doubted that moving on was the right thing to do.
However, if the company is reasonable in other respects and deals with smaller issues well, and you have a good relationship with your boss, then it may make sense to try to discuss your concerns with your boss. Perhaps broach the subject by first stating your admiration and respect, and then gently expressing concern that something is amiss because recent behavior has been so inconsistent.
Thank you for the thoughtful answer. It didn't use to be like this, but now even the other senior partner gets its share of rage and dressing downs. He cannot deal with any feedback, and even when third parties are invited to help if they come up with anything negative about how the business is being ran he dismisses them. The telltale sign for me is - everybody else is at fault even though we have unanimity in our opinion that it is not the case.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:04
I'm sorry to say that doesnt sound good. Possibly talk to the other senior partner about your concerns and assess whether he or she is willing to attempt to broach the issue. If the other partner won't address it either, it may well be time for you to find a greener pasture.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 2 '12 at 2:16
Oh boy... I have been thinking about it, it is hard to do that after so many years. I have been reading about bipolar disease and to my astonishment the symptoms of mania episodes are all there. The other senior partner at meetings looks like a deer in the headlights and later he doesn't have the energy to do anything. I guess it is time to dust off my resume.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:24
2
Do keep in mind that the other senior partner may not have the same knowledge of bipolar disorder that you now do. If you think they would consider the information honestly, it might be good to talk to them (while also working on plan B), in case they are able to discuss the concerns with their partner and suggest treatment. It would be a good thing to do, but may not help anyhow because while a person is in a manic phase it is very hard to convince them anything is "wrong" and needs to be treated - they often feel energized and fearless.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 3 '12 at 16:49
3
I don't know if a clinical diagnosis of bipolar disorder is the right answer, since it sounds like both senior partners are desperate and depressed because business is bad. When there is no work at all, contracts that simply break even or aren't as much of a loss as having no work seem appealing. The burden of responsibility for one's employee's welfare can be crushing, especially when things aren't going well.
â David Navarre
Jul 23 '12 at 14:30
add a comment |Â
up vote
15
down vote
accepted
up vote
15
down vote
accepted
First let me say that this is a difficult situation, and you don't know for sure if bipolar is the cause of your boss's unusual and counterproductive behavior. Regardless of the cause, the way to respond will be similar and will vary a lot depending on other aspects of each unique case.
It sounds like you suspect your boss is either untreated or the treatment is not working, because the behaviot is affecting your boss's ability to perform his job to his normal standards.
You ask whether to try to get help or to just work someplace else. The answer depends a lot on other aspects of the boss and your relationship with him. I'd suggest thinking through the following questions to decide if you should try to gently approach the issue, or just move on:
- Does your boss respond well to constructive feedback?
- Does he try to make changes when a problem is identified?
- Do you have a strong channel of communication with him?
- If this were about another employee rather than him directly, would he respond reasonably to such concerns?
- Are there others in the company you can go to with your concerns?
- Is there a precedent in your workplace for employee feedback on working environment or company policies and practices?
If you can think of a less significant situation that has been handled poorly or ignored, I wouldn't hold out hope that this one will be handled well. I've been in situations before where I've tried to address issues but the truth is that the management just does not have the skill or motivation to deal with complex and sensitive issues such as the one you describe, and I've never doubted that moving on was the right thing to do.
However, if the company is reasonable in other respects and deals with smaller issues well, and you have a good relationship with your boss, then it may make sense to try to discuss your concerns with your boss. Perhaps broach the subject by first stating your admiration and respect, and then gently expressing concern that something is amiss because recent behavior has been so inconsistent.
First let me say that this is a difficult situation, and you don't know for sure if bipolar is the cause of your boss's unusual and counterproductive behavior. Regardless of the cause, the way to respond will be similar and will vary a lot depending on other aspects of each unique case.
It sounds like you suspect your boss is either untreated or the treatment is not working, because the behaviot is affecting your boss's ability to perform his job to his normal standards.
You ask whether to try to get help or to just work someplace else. The answer depends a lot on other aspects of the boss and your relationship with him. I'd suggest thinking through the following questions to decide if you should try to gently approach the issue, or just move on:
- Does your boss respond well to constructive feedback?
- Does he try to make changes when a problem is identified?
- Do you have a strong channel of communication with him?
- If this were about another employee rather than him directly, would he respond reasonably to such concerns?
- Are there others in the company you can go to with your concerns?
- Is there a precedent in your workplace for employee feedback on working environment or company policies and practices?
If you can think of a less significant situation that has been handled poorly or ignored, I wouldn't hold out hope that this one will be handled well. I've been in situations before where I've tried to address issues but the truth is that the management just does not have the skill or motivation to deal with complex and sensitive issues such as the one you describe, and I've never doubted that moving on was the right thing to do.
However, if the company is reasonable in other respects and deals with smaller issues well, and you have a good relationship with your boss, then it may make sense to try to discuss your concerns with your boss. Perhaps broach the subject by first stating your admiration and respect, and then gently expressing concern that something is amiss because recent behavior has been so inconsistent.
answered Jun 2 '12 at 1:45
Tech Lover in NYC
771617
771617
Thank you for the thoughtful answer. It didn't use to be like this, but now even the other senior partner gets its share of rage and dressing downs. He cannot deal with any feedback, and even when third parties are invited to help if they come up with anything negative about how the business is being ran he dismisses them. The telltale sign for me is - everybody else is at fault even though we have unanimity in our opinion that it is not the case.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:04
I'm sorry to say that doesnt sound good. Possibly talk to the other senior partner about your concerns and assess whether he or she is willing to attempt to broach the issue. If the other partner won't address it either, it may well be time for you to find a greener pasture.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 2 '12 at 2:16
Oh boy... I have been thinking about it, it is hard to do that after so many years. I have been reading about bipolar disease and to my astonishment the symptoms of mania episodes are all there. The other senior partner at meetings looks like a deer in the headlights and later he doesn't have the energy to do anything. I guess it is time to dust off my resume.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:24
2
Do keep in mind that the other senior partner may not have the same knowledge of bipolar disorder that you now do. If you think they would consider the information honestly, it might be good to talk to them (while also working on plan B), in case they are able to discuss the concerns with their partner and suggest treatment. It would be a good thing to do, but may not help anyhow because while a person is in a manic phase it is very hard to convince them anything is "wrong" and needs to be treated - they often feel energized and fearless.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 3 '12 at 16:49
3
I don't know if a clinical diagnosis of bipolar disorder is the right answer, since it sounds like both senior partners are desperate and depressed because business is bad. When there is no work at all, contracts that simply break even or aren't as much of a loss as having no work seem appealing. The burden of responsibility for one's employee's welfare can be crushing, especially when things aren't going well.
â David Navarre
Jul 23 '12 at 14:30
add a comment |Â
Thank you for the thoughtful answer. It didn't use to be like this, but now even the other senior partner gets its share of rage and dressing downs. He cannot deal with any feedback, and even when third parties are invited to help if they come up with anything negative about how the business is being ran he dismisses them. The telltale sign for me is - everybody else is at fault even though we have unanimity in our opinion that it is not the case.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:04
I'm sorry to say that doesnt sound good. Possibly talk to the other senior partner about your concerns and assess whether he or she is willing to attempt to broach the issue. If the other partner won't address it either, it may well be time for you to find a greener pasture.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 2 '12 at 2:16
Oh boy... I have been thinking about it, it is hard to do that after so many years. I have been reading about bipolar disease and to my astonishment the symptoms of mania episodes are all there. The other senior partner at meetings looks like a deer in the headlights and later he doesn't have the energy to do anything. I guess it is time to dust off my resume.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:24
2
Do keep in mind that the other senior partner may not have the same knowledge of bipolar disorder that you now do. If you think they would consider the information honestly, it might be good to talk to them (while also working on plan B), in case they are able to discuss the concerns with their partner and suggest treatment. It would be a good thing to do, but may not help anyhow because while a person is in a manic phase it is very hard to convince them anything is "wrong" and needs to be treated - they often feel energized and fearless.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 3 '12 at 16:49
3
I don't know if a clinical diagnosis of bipolar disorder is the right answer, since it sounds like both senior partners are desperate and depressed because business is bad. When there is no work at all, contracts that simply break even or aren't as much of a loss as having no work seem appealing. The burden of responsibility for one's employee's welfare can be crushing, especially when things aren't going well.
â David Navarre
Jul 23 '12 at 14:30
Thank you for the thoughtful answer. It didn't use to be like this, but now even the other senior partner gets its share of rage and dressing downs. He cannot deal with any feedback, and even when third parties are invited to help if they come up with anything negative about how the business is being ran he dismisses them. The telltale sign for me is - everybody else is at fault even though we have unanimity in our opinion that it is not the case.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:04
Thank you for the thoughtful answer. It didn't use to be like this, but now even the other senior partner gets its share of rage and dressing downs. He cannot deal with any feedback, and even when third parties are invited to help if they come up with anything negative about how the business is being ran he dismisses them. The telltale sign for me is - everybody else is at fault even though we have unanimity in our opinion that it is not the case.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:04
I'm sorry to say that doesnt sound good. Possibly talk to the other senior partner about your concerns and assess whether he or she is willing to attempt to broach the issue. If the other partner won't address it either, it may well be time for you to find a greener pasture.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 2 '12 at 2:16
I'm sorry to say that doesnt sound good. Possibly talk to the other senior partner about your concerns and assess whether he or she is willing to attempt to broach the issue. If the other partner won't address it either, it may well be time for you to find a greener pasture.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 2 '12 at 2:16
Oh boy... I have been thinking about it, it is hard to do that after so many years. I have been reading about bipolar disease and to my astonishment the symptoms of mania episodes are all there. The other senior partner at meetings looks like a deer in the headlights and later he doesn't have the energy to do anything. I guess it is time to dust off my resume.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:24
Oh boy... I have been thinking about it, it is hard to do that after so many years. I have been reading about bipolar disease and to my astonishment the symptoms of mania episodes are all there. The other senior partner at meetings looks like a deer in the headlights and later he doesn't have the energy to do anything. I guess it is time to dust off my resume.
â user1220
Jun 2 '12 at 2:24
2
2
Do keep in mind that the other senior partner may not have the same knowledge of bipolar disorder that you now do. If you think they would consider the information honestly, it might be good to talk to them (while also working on plan B), in case they are able to discuss the concerns with their partner and suggest treatment. It would be a good thing to do, but may not help anyhow because while a person is in a manic phase it is very hard to convince them anything is "wrong" and needs to be treated - they often feel energized and fearless.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 3 '12 at 16:49
Do keep in mind that the other senior partner may not have the same knowledge of bipolar disorder that you now do. If you think they would consider the information honestly, it might be good to talk to them (while also working on plan B), in case they are able to discuss the concerns with their partner and suggest treatment. It would be a good thing to do, but may not help anyhow because while a person is in a manic phase it is very hard to convince them anything is "wrong" and needs to be treated - they often feel energized and fearless.
â Tech Lover in NYC
Jun 3 '12 at 16:49
3
3
I don't know if a clinical diagnosis of bipolar disorder is the right answer, since it sounds like both senior partners are desperate and depressed because business is bad. When there is no work at all, contracts that simply break even or aren't as much of a loss as having no work seem appealing. The burden of responsibility for one's employee's welfare can be crushing, especially when things aren't going well.
â David Navarre
Jul 23 '12 at 14:30
I don't know if a clinical diagnosis of bipolar disorder is the right answer, since it sounds like both senior partners are desperate and depressed because business is bad. When there is no work at all, contracts that simply break even or aren't as much of a loss as having no work seem appealing. The burden of responsibility for one's employee's welfare can be crushing, especially when things aren't going well.
â David Navarre
Jul 23 '12 at 14:30
add a comment |Â