Other Department manager viewing me as a problem and attacking me. How to deal with the situation?

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I am working as a development team lead for a US based Organization. Recently I feel that another department manager is viewing me as a problem and attacking me. Below are reasons



  1. I had arranged a meeting for discussing couple of things related to both departments and she shouted at me at one topic. Even though my team members and myself tried to convince her and explain that we are not responsible or source of her problems, she doesn’t get that point.

  2. In another meeting with PM where agenda was specific to certain point and she asks the information from another area. For her it is related, since I don’t know I told in the meeting I don’t have the information readily and I can provide immediately after the meeting. But she made comment saying “While coming to meeting this information should be handy.”

  3. In another meeting where all departments managers and Directors are there and she asked a question directly referring to me. I got confused and I told that I didn’t understand and requested for more elaboration. She immediately refer to my manager and asks him “Did you understand?”. I have ended up saying “Mr. Manager, please help me to understand EQA managers question”.

The above incidents make me more defensive when she/her team approaches me. How to deal this situation?







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  • 2




    Talk to your manager, explain what's going on, and ask whether you've been missing something or, if not, what you could do to improve this situation. You want your "customer" to be happy, but that may require that themanagers get together and discuss whether everyone's operating from the same expectations. If you don't understand something, saying so and asking for clarification is entirely appropriate. If your manager did understand it, there's nothing wrong with asking him; that's how we find out what we need to learn.
    – keshlam
    Nov 30 '15 at 3:13
















up vote
4
down vote

favorite












I am working as a development team lead for a US based Organization. Recently I feel that another department manager is viewing me as a problem and attacking me. Below are reasons



  1. I had arranged a meeting for discussing couple of things related to both departments and she shouted at me at one topic. Even though my team members and myself tried to convince her and explain that we are not responsible or source of her problems, she doesn’t get that point.

  2. In another meeting with PM where agenda was specific to certain point and she asks the information from another area. For her it is related, since I don’t know I told in the meeting I don’t have the information readily and I can provide immediately after the meeting. But she made comment saying “While coming to meeting this information should be handy.”

  3. In another meeting where all departments managers and Directors are there and she asked a question directly referring to me. I got confused and I told that I didn’t understand and requested for more elaboration. She immediately refer to my manager and asks him “Did you understand?”. I have ended up saying “Mr. Manager, please help me to understand EQA managers question”.

The above incidents make me more defensive when she/her team approaches me. How to deal this situation?







share|improve this question


















  • 2




    Talk to your manager, explain what's going on, and ask whether you've been missing something or, if not, what you could do to improve this situation. You want your "customer" to be happy, but that may require that themanagers get together and discuss whether everyone's operating from the same expectations. If you don't understand something, saying so and asking for clarification is entirely appropriate. If your manager did understand it, there's nothing wrong with asking him; that's how we find out what we need to learn.
    – keshlam
    Nov 30 '15 at 3:13












up vote
4
down vote

favorite









up vote
4
down vote

favorite











I am working as a development team lead for a US based Organization. Recently I feel that another department manager is viewing me as a problem and attacking me. Below are reasons



  1. I had arranged a meeting for discussing couple of things related to both departments and she shouted at me at one topic. Even though my team members and myself tried to convince her and explain that we are not responsible or source of her problems, she doesn’t get that point.

  2. In another meeting with PM where agenda was specific to certain point and she asks the information from another area. For her it is related, since I don’t know I told in the meeting I don’t have the information readily and I can provide immediately after the meeting. But she made comment saying “While coming to meeting this information should be handy.”

  3. In another meeting where all departments managers and Directors are there and she asked a question directly referring to me. I got confused and I told that I didn’t understand and requested for more elaboration. She immediately refer to my manager and asks him “Did you understand?”. I have ended up saying “Mr. Manager, please help me to understand EQA managers question”.

The above incidents make me more defensive when she/her team approaches me. How to deal this situation?







share|improve this question














I am working as a development team lead for a US based Organization. Recently I feel that another department manager is viewing me as a problem and attacking me. Below are reasons



  1. I had arranged a meeting for discussing couple of things related to both departments and she shouted at me at one topic. Even though my team members and myself tried to convince her and explain that we are not responsible or source of her problems, she doesn’t get that point.

  2. In another meeting with PM where agenda was specific to certain point and she asks the information from another area. For her it is related, since I don’t know I told in the meeting I don’t have the information readily and I can provide immediately after the meeting. But she made comment saying “While coming to meeting this information should be handy.”

  3. In another meeting where all departments managers and Directors are there and she asked a question directly referring to me. I got confused and I told that I didn’t understand and requested for more elaboration. She immediately refer to my manager and asks him “Did you understand?”. I have ended up saying “Mr. Manager, please help me to understand EQA managers question”.

The above incidents make me more defensive when she/her team approaches me. How to deal this situation?









share|improve this question













share|improve this question




share|improve this question








edited Nov 30 '15 at 10:10









BiscuitBoy

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asked Nov 30 '15 at 2:00









Babu

3,28332059




3,28332059







  • 2




    Talk to your manager, explain what's going on, and ask whether you've been missing something or, if not, what you could do to improve this situation. You want your "customer" to be happy, but that may require that themanagers get together and discuss whether everyone's operating from the same expectations. If you don't understand something, saying so and asking for clarification is entirely appropriate. If your manager did understand it, there's nothing wrong with asking him; that's how we find out what we need to learn.
    – keshlam
    Nov 30 '15 at 3:13












  • 2




    Talk to your manager, explain what's going on, and ask whether you've been missing something or, if not, what you could do to improve this situation. You want your "customer" to be happy, but that may require that themanagers get together and discuss whether everyone's operating from the same expectations. If you don't understand something, saying so and asking for clarification is entirely appropriate. If your manager did understand it, there's nothing wrong with asking him; that's how we find out what we need to learn.
    – keshlam
    Nov 30 '15 at 3:13







2




2




Talk to your manager, explain what's going on, and ask whether you've been missing something or, if not, what you could do to improve this situation. You want your "customer" to be happy, but that may require that themanagers get together and discuss whether everyone's operating from the same expectations. If you don't understand something, saying so and asking for clarification is entirely appropriate. If your manager did understand it, there's nothing wrong with asking him; that's how we find out what we need to learn.
– keshlam
Nov 30 '15 at 3:13




Talk to your manager, explain what's going on, and ask whether you've been missing something or, if not, what you could do to improve this situation. You want your "customer" to be happy, but that may require that themanagers get together and discuss whether everyone's operating from the same expectations. If you don't understand something, saying so and asking for clarification is entirely appropriate. If your manager did understand it, there's nothing wrong with asking him; that's how we find out what we need to learn.
– keshlam
Nov 30 '15 at 3:13










1 Answer
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The above incidents make me more defensive when she/her team
approaches me. How to deal this situation?




This is something your manager needs to deal with, if others are yelling at his staff then that will affect his teams morale. So speak to your manager about your concerns and that you are uncomfortable. Do NOT personally retaliate to the manager in question, this is unprofessional and could get you in deep trouble. Instead, just refer them to your manager to handle as politely as you can.



At the end of the day you answer to your manager not another teams. Don't let her worry you, just do your job. Be careful to do it properly because you appear to be under some scrutiny, but you should be doing so in any case.






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    1 Answer
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    1 Answer
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    up vote
    5
    down vote














    The above incidents make me more defensive when she/her team
    approaches me. How to deal this situation?




    This is something your manager needs to deal with, if others are yelling at his staff then that will affect his teams morale. So speak to your manager about your concerns and that you are uncomfortable. Do NOT personally retaliate to the manager in question, this is unprofessional and could get you in deep trouble. Instead, just refer them to your manager to handle as politely as you can.



    At the end of the day you answer to your manager not another teams. Don't let her worry you, just do your job. Be careful to do it properly because you appear to be under some scrutiny, but you should be doing so in any case.






    share|improve this answer
























      up vote
      5
      down vote














      The above incidents make me more defensive when she/her team
      approaches me. How to deal this situation?




      This is something your manager needs to deal with, if others are yelling at his staff then that will affect his teams morale. So speak to your manager about your concerns and that you are uncomfortable. Do NOT personally retaliate to the manager in question, this is unprofessional and could get you in deep trouble. Instead, just refer them to your manager to handle as politely as you can.



      At the end of the day you answer to your manager not another teams. Don't let her worry you, just do your job. Be careful to do it properly because you appear to be under some scrutiny, but you should be doing so in any case.






      share|improve this answer






















        up vote
        5
        down vote










        up vote
        5
        down vote










        The above incidents make me more defensive when she/her team
        approaches me. How to deal this situation?




        This is something your manager needs to deal with, if others are yelling at his staff then that will affect his teams morale. So speak to your manager about your concerns and that you are uncomfortable. Do NOT personally retaliate to the manager in question, this is unprofessional and could get you in deep trouble. Instead, just refer them to your manager to handle as politely as you can.



        At the end of the day you answer to your manager not another teams. Don't let her worry you, just do your job. Be careful to do it properly because you appear to be under some scrutiny, but you should be doing so in any case.






        share|improve this answer













        The above incidents make me more defensive when she/her team
        approaches me. How to deal this situation?




        This is something your manager needs to deal with, if others are yelling at his staff then that will affect his teams morale. So speak to your manager about your concerns and that you are uncomfortable. Do NOT personally retaliate to the manager in question, this is unprofessional and could get you in deep trouble. Instead, just refer them to your manager to handle as politely as you can.



        At the end of the day you answer to your manager not another teams. Don't let her worry you, just do your job. Be careful to do it properly because you appear to be under some scrutiny, but you should be doing so in any case.







        share|improve this answer












        share|improve this answer



        share|improve this answer










        answered Nov 30 '15 at 8:17









        Kilisi

        94.7k50216376




        94.7k50216376






















             

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